Child protection plan and SS

[moomoomeadows]

Hi, me and my partner are currently expecting our first baby together in April.
He is on the SOR since 2023 for a total of 10 years.
He has a Sexual Harm prevention order until July 2028, where his conditions state he is not allowed to live in the same place as a person under 18 unless express permission is provided by social services.
We have been very open and honest with the midwives, police child services, health visitors and more since finding out i was pregnant, and have tried our best to cooperate with anything they request.
We recently underwent a Child protection planning conference, where it was deemed my baby needed to be placed on a child protection plan until both him and i could undergo risk assessments to deem he is not a risk or a very low risk, and i am able to protect my baby significantly.
Unfortunately, without these assessments being complete he has been refused to live with us upon my babies arrival, which we both expected.
However, if i am unable to prove that i can protect my baby in his presence, threats have been made for him to be unable to see her unless there is another person who undergoes the same protective assessment.
We dont live close to family, and it is a lot of pressure to put on my friends. If this something they are allowed to enforce?
The only other requirement on his SHPO is that if contact is to be made with a person under 18, their legal carer/guardian must have full knowledge of his offences, and provide a written statement to the council they reside stating full consent is given. Why is it the case i may not be allowed to supervise my baby in his presence if i fail the assessment?

Is there any advice you can give on how to prove to SS i am able to protect my baby?
What is it they are looking for in order to deem me responsible enough to safeguard her?

And with regards to his living arrangements, they have already stated they will not help with housing, so what are the things we need to consider when hegoes for his assessment so he can be allowed to live with us?

Furthermore, if we are still being monitored by SS when his SHPO expires, and he has still not been given permission to live with us, are they still able to enforce this? His SHPO is only in place for a total of 5 years, so will expire July 2028.

Any help would much be appreciated, because the whole situation is really stressing us out. My baby deserves her dad, and im under the impression that he may not ever be able to see her in just my presence if i fail my protective assessment.

Thanks

[Winter25]

Hi moomoomeadows,

I’m really sorry you’re dealing with all of this while pregnant. It’s a lot to carry, especially when what should be an exciting time is dominated by meetings, assessments and uncertainty. The stress you’re feeling is completely understandable.

I want to try to strip this back a bit, because a lot of fear comes from things being said in ways that sound final or threatening, when in reality they’re part of a process rather than a judgement on you or your baby.

Right now, this is pre-birth safeguarding, not punishment. Because your partner is on the SOR and has a SHPO, professionals are legally required to assess risk before the baby is born. That’s why everything feels intense and front-loaded. It does not mean they have decided to remove your baby, or that you are already seen as unsafe, or that your partner will never be involved.

Children’s Services can carry out assessments, put a child protection plan in place while those assessments are ongoing, and require your partner not to live with you until permission is given. That aligns with his SHPO. They can also look at whether you can safely protect your baby and, if needed, suggest supervised contact for a period.

What they cannot do is important too. They can’t permanently stop a parent seeing their child without court involvement. They can’t remove a baby purely because of “association” if there is no evidence of harm. They can’t enforce criminal restrictions forever once orders expire. And they can’t lawfully punish you just for loving someone if you are open, risk-aware and prioritising your child.

A lot of what you’re hearing at the moment will be framed as “if you fail this, then that will happen”. That doesn’t mean those outcomes are inevitable. It means they are testing whether you understand risk and can put your baby first under pressure.

The protective parent assessment isn’t about whether you love your child or your partner. It’s about insight, boundaries and priorities. They’re looking to see that you understand what his offences were, that you don’t minimise them, that you follow safety rules consistently, and that if you were ever faced with a choice, your baby would come first. That doesn’t mean you’re expected to abandon your relationship now, it means you’re expected to show you can act protectively if needed.

On supervision, it’s very common at the start of cases like this for Children’s Services to ask for third-party supervision. That’s usually a temporary measure, not a life sentence. As trust builds and assessments are completed, arrangements often step down. What they can’t do is insist on indefinite supervision unless there is ongoing evidence that risk can’t be safely managed.

Housing is frustrating, and you’re right that they don’t have to help with it. What they are looking for is clarity and stability. Separate accommodation for your partner while assessments are ongoing, clear boundaries, and no “grey areas” all help reduce perceived risk rather than increase it.

About the SHPO ending in 2028: once it expires, criminal restrictions end. Children’s Services don’t get to enforce criminal conditions forever. However, they can still raise safeguarding concerns if they believe there is ongoing risk. That’s why compliance, time, and a lack of incidents really matter, risk narratives weaken when nothing happens.

The most important thing to hold onto is this: you are not powerless in any of this, and this is not decided yet. You are being assessed, and assessments can be passed.

If at any point things feel implied rather than clearly explained, you are allowed to ask for clarity in writing. Sometimes that alone helps calm things down. If it helps, a short, neutral email could be along these lines:

-----
Subject: Clarification of Protective Parent Assessment and Interim Arrangements

Dear [Social Worker’s name],

I hope you are well.

I am writing to ensure I clearly understand what is expected of me while assessments are ongoing, and to confirm how decisions are being approached in relation to my baby’s safety and care.

I am committed to cooperating fully with Children’s Services and to safeguarding my baby. I want to make sure I am meeting expectations appropriately and not making assumptions during this process.

Please could you clarify the following:

What specific factors are being considered within my protective parent assessment

What Children’s Services are looking for in order to demonstrate that I am able to safeguard my baby

Whether the current supervision and living arrangements are intended to be temporary while assessments are completed

What steps or evidence would support progression or review of these arrangements

I appreciate that assessments take time, and I want to work constructively and transparently throughout. Any clarification you can provide in writing would be very helpful in allowing me to engage confidently and appropriately.

Thank you for your time and support.

Kind regards,

--------

That keeps things calm, cooperative and focused on your baby.

You’ve done the right things so far: you’ve been honest which is what is needed, you haven’t hidden anything, and you’re asking questions instead of reacting in panic. None of that points to a parent who can’t protect their child.
========
For full transparency, I am not an official adviser. I am a parent with lived experience of the family court system, offering strategic guidance. Always consult with a solicitor regarding ongoing court proceedings.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi, me and my partner are currently expecting our first baby together in April.
He is on the SOR since 2023 for a total of 10 years.
He has a Sexual Harm prevention order until July 2028, where his conditions state he is not allowed to live in the same place as a person under 18 unless express permission is provided by social services.
We have been very open and honest with the midwives, police child services, health visitors and more since finding out i was pregnant, and have tried our best to cooperate with anything they request.
We recently underwent a Child protection planning conference, where it was deemed my baby needed to be placed on a child protection plan until both him and i could undergo risk assessments to deem he is not a risk or a very low risk, and i am able to protect my baby significantly.
Unfortunately, without these assessments being complete he has been refused to live with us upon my babies arrival, which we both expected.
However, if i am unable to prove that i can protect my baby in his presence, threats have been made for him to be unable to see her unless there is another person who undergoes the same protective assessment.
We dont live close to family, and it is a lot of pressure to put on my friends. If this something they are allowed to enforce?
The only other requirement on his SHPO is that if contact is to be made with a person under 18, their legal carer/guardian must have full knowledge of his offences, and provide a written statement to the council they reside stating full consent is given. Why is it the case i may not be allowed to supervise my baby in his presence if i fail the assessment?

Is there any advice you can give on how to prove to SS i am able to protect my baby?
What is it they are looking for in order to deem me responsible enough to safeguard her?

And with regards to his living arrangements, they have already stated they will not help with housing, so what are the things we need to consider when hegoes for his assessment so he can be allowed to live with us?

Furthermore, if we are still being monitored by SS when his SHPO expires, and he has still not been given permission to live with us, are they still able to enforce this? His SHPO is only in place for a total of 5 years, so will expire July 2028.

Any help would much be appreciated, because the whole situation is really stressing us out. My baby deserves her dad, and im under the impression that he may not ever be able to see her in just my presence if i fail my protective assessment.

Thanks

Dear Moomoomeadows,

Thank you for your post. I am Suzie, an online adviser for Family Rights Group responding to you today.

Congratulations on your pregnancy. I am sorry to read about your stressful circumstances and hope I can guide you to useful information.
You are seeking advice as to how children’s services will assess your ability to protect your child and hope that you will be judged capable of supervising the contact in the future.

As has already been said in your reply from another forum user, children’s services will want to find out if you understand the offences and the impact on the victims; that you do not seek to deny or minimise your partner’s actions and that you are aware of the possible risks to your child that his offender profile presents.

You could ask the social worker to recommend relevant parent education and resources to help you work out how you can protect and manage risk.
Lucy Faithfull Foundation have ample information on their website about keeping children safe and ways to prevent sexual abuse. There is a family and friends’ forum where you can communicate with others affected by issues stemming from sexual offending, and also a helpline. You can link to the website here.
You can read more about child protection procedures and plans here.

You explain that you do not live close to family, and you are worried about putting too much pressure on friends. It could help to bring the network around your baby together to discuss ways that you can be supported to implement a safety plan. The whole situation is putting massive pressure on you, and it would be wise to accept support from people who are prepared to offer it. Family group conference is a way for the network (friends and family) around a child to meet, with the help of a professional chair to plan ways they can help. You can read more about family group conference here. If you feel this could be helpful to you – you could ask the social worker to make a referral.

I hope that this information was useful. Please feel free to post again here or contact us in another way for advice.

You can call our free, confidential adviceline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm) to speak in person with an adviser. We also have a webchat which is currently open on Monday and Thursday afternoons, and an advice enquiry form.
Best wishes,
Suzie

[moomoomeadows]

Thank you so much for the help Winter25.
This has really calmed my nerves a lot.
We had our first core group conference today, it outlines the plan thats currently set in place and what needs to be done regarding each concern raised.
I do feel more confident in the situation, but your email draft will definitely come in handy.
I understand what they want to do regarding the assessments that need completing however still don't know what they expect from us as parents to show them to prove this.

I really appreciate your help and think that we need to look into outlining the importance that baby will always come first.
We have looked into housing, and i have applied to receive help via universal credit. My partner has gone down declaring homelessness through our local council to se if they can find something to accommodate him while assessments are being completed.

Once again, thank you for the information.

Hi moomoomeadows,

I’m really sorry you’re dealing with all of this while pregnant. It’s a lot to carry, especially when what should be an exciting time is dominated by meetings, assessments and uncertainty. The stress you’re feeling is completely understandable.

I want to try to strip this back a bit, because a lot of fear comes from things being said in ways that sound final or threatening, when in reality they’re part of a process rather than a judgement on you or your baby.

Right now, this is pre-birth safeguarding, not punishment. Because your partner is on the SOR and has a SHPO, professionals are legally required to assess risk before the baby is born. That’s why everything feels intense and front-loaded. It does not mean they have decided to remove your baby, or that you are already seen as unsafe, or that your partner will never be involved.

Children’s Services can carry out assessments, put a child protection plan in place while those assessments are ongoing, and require your partner not to live with you until permission is given. That aligns with his SHPO. They can also look at whether you can safely protect your baby and, if needed, suggest supervised contact for a period.

What they cannot do is important too. They can’t permanently stop a parent seeing their child without court involvement. They can’t remove a baby purely because of “association” if there is no evidence of harm. They can’t enforce criminal restrictions forever once orders expire. And they can’t lawfully punish you just for loving someone if you are open, risk-aware and prioritising your child.

A lot of what you’re hearing at the moment will be framed as “if you fail this, then that will happen”. That doesn’t mean those outcomes are inevitable. It means they are testing whether you understand risk and can put your baby first under pressure.

The protective parent assessment isn’t about whether you love your child or your partner. It’s about insight, boundaries and priorities. They’re looking to see that you understand what his offences were, that you don’t minimise them, that you follow safety rules consistently, and that if you were ever faced with a choice, your baby would come first. That doesn’t mean you’re expected to abandon your relationship now, it means you’re expected to show you can act protectively if needed.

On supervision, it’s very common at the start of cases like this for Children’s Services to ask for third-party supervision. That’s usually a temporary measure, not a life sentence. As trust builds and assessments are completed, arrangements often step down. What they can’t do is insist on indefinite supervision unless there is ongoing evidence that risk can’t be safely managed.

Housing is frustrating, and you’re right that they don’t have to help with it. What they are looking for is clarity and stability. Separate accommodation for your partner while assessments are ongoing, clear boundaries, and no “grey areas” all help reduce perceived risk rather than increase it.

About the SHPO ending in 2028: once it expires, criminal restrictions end. Children’s Services don’t get to enforce criminal conditions forever. However, they can still raise safeguarding concerns if they believe there is ongoing risk. That’s why compliance, time, and a lack of incidents really matter, risk narratives weaken when nothing happens.

The most important thing to hold onto is this: you are not powerless in any of this, and this is not decided yet. You are being assessed, and assessments can be passed.

If at any point things feel implied rather than clearly explained, you are allowed to ask for clarity in writing. Sometimes that alone helps calm things down. If it helps, a short, neutral email could be along these lines:

-----
Subject: Clarification of Protective Parent Assessment and Interim Arrangements

Dear [Social Worker’s name],

I hope you are well.

I am writing to ensure I clearly understand what is expected of me while assessments are ongoing, and to confirm how decisions are being approached in relation to my baby’s safety and care.

I am committed to cooperating fully with Children’s Services and to safeguarding my baby. I want to make sure I am meeting expectations appropriately and not making assumptions during this process.

Please could you clarify the following:

What specific factors are being considered within my protective parent assessment

What Children’s Services are looking for in order to demonstrate that I am able to safeguard my baby

Whether the current supervision and living arrangements are intended to be temporary while assessments are completed

What steps or evidence would support progression or review of these arrangements

I appreciate that assessments take time, and I want to work constructively and transparently throughout. Any clarification you can provide in writing would be very helpful in allowing me to engage confidently and appropriately.

Thank you for your time and support.

Kind regards,

--------

That keeps things calm, cooperative and focused on your baby.

You’ve done the right things so far: you’ve been honest which is what is needed, you haven’t hidden anything, and you’re asking questions instead of reacting in panic. None of that points to a parent who can’t protect their child.
========
For full transparency, I am not an official adviser. I am a parent with lived experience of the family court system, offering strategic guidance. Always consult with a solicitor regarding ongoing court proceedings.

[moomoomeadows]

Hi Suzie,

Thank you for your reply.
We have been referred to a family social worker, who should be in contact with me to start sessions to help me understand offending behaviour and why people offend in the first place. They normally do these as a group, but have decided to do it as 1-1 sessions instead specifically tailored to our situation.
I think i might start writing down a lot of questions to ask them in these meetings so i can fully understand what they are looking for and this may help me to understand the best ways to explain to them how i am capable of protecting my baby.
They had concerns initially because i stated i had complete trust in my partner as he hasnt shown me any reason he should be of concern. However, in the Child protection conference i had started to realise my naivety and tried explaining how my views have changed.
They brought this as a concern mainly because was i just stating this following the situation, or do i actually understand the risk he poses to my baby.
Do you have any advice on how i can further express that my views have changed, or will this be something that comes with time following my protective assessment?

Thank you so much for your help!

Hi, me and my partner are currently expecting our first baby together in April.
He is on the SOR since 2023 for a total of 10 years.
He has a Sexual Harm prevention order until July 2028, where his conditions state he is not allowed to live in the same place as a person under 18 unless express permission is provided by social services.
We have been very open and honest with the midwives, police child services, health visitors and more since finding out i was pregnant, and have tried our best to cooperate with anything they request.
We recently underwent a Child protection planning conference, where it was deemed my baby needed to be placed on a child protection plan until both him and i could undergo risk assessments to deem he is not a risk or a very low risk, and i am able to protect my baby significantly.
Unfortunately, without these assessments being complete he has been refused to live with us upon my babies arrival, which we both expected.
However, if i am unable to prove that i can protect my baby in his presence, threats have been made for him to be unable to see her unless there is another person who undergoes the same protective assessment.
We dont live close to family, and it is a lot of pressure to put on my friends. If this something they are allowed to enforce?
The only other requirement on his SHPO is that if contact is to be made with a person under 18, their legal carer/guardian must have full knowledge of his offences, and provide a written statement to the council they reside stating full consent is given. Why is it the case i may not be allowed to supervise my baby in his presence if i fail the assessment?

Is there any advice you can give on how to prove to SS i am able to protect my baby?
What is it they are looking for in order to deem me responsible enough to safeguard her?

And with regards to his living arrangements, they have already stated they will not help with housing, so what are the things we need to consider when hegoes for his assessment so he can be allowed to live with us?

Furthermore, if we are still being monitored by SS when his SHPO expires, and he has still not been given permission to live with us, are they still able to enforce this? His SHPO is only in place for a total of 5 years, so will expire July 2028.

Any help would much be appreciated, because the whole situation is really stressing us out. My baby deserves her dad, and im under the impression that he may not ever be able to see her in just my presence if i fail my protective assessment.

Thanks

Dear Moomoomeadows,

Thank you for your post. I am Suzie, an online adviser for Family Rights Group responding to you today.

Congratulations on your pregnancy. I am sorry to read about your stressful circumstances and hope I can guide you to useful information.
You are seeking advice as to how children’s services will assess your ability to protect your child and hope that you will be judged capable of supervising the contact in the future.

As has already been said in your reply from another forum user, children’s services will want to find out if you understand the offences and the impact on the victims; that you do not seek to deny or minimise your partner’s actions and that you are aware of the possible risks to your child that his offender profile presents.

You could ask the social worker to recommend relevant parent education and resources to help you work out how you can protect and manage risk.
Lucy Faithfull Foundation have ample information on their website about keeping children safe and ways to prevent sexual abuse. There is a family and friends’ forum where you can communicate with others affected by issues stemming from sexual offending, and also a helpline. You can link to the website here.
You can read more about child protection procedures and plans here.

You explain that you do not live close to family, and you are worried about putting too much pressure on friends. It could help to bring the network around your baby together to discuss ways that you can be supported to implement a safety plan. The whole situation is putting massive pressure on you, and it would be wise to accept support from people who are prepared to offer it. Family group conference is a way for the network (friends and family) around a child to meet, with the help of a professional chair to plan ways they can help. You can read more about family group conference here. If you feel this could be helpful to you – you could ask the social worker to make a referral.

I hope that this information was useful. Please feel free to post again here or contact us in another way for advice.

You can call our free, confidential adviceline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm) to speak in person with an adviser. We also have a webchat which is currently open on Monday and Thursday afternoons, and an advice enquiry form.
Best wishes,
Suzie

[Winter25]

Hi moomoomeadows,

What you’ve written here actually shows a lot of progress already.

One of the biggest things professionals look for in a protective parent assessment is movement in understanding over time, not a single perfect statement made under pressure. The fact that you can now reflect and say “I trusted him, but I understand now why that isn’t enough on its own” is important. Insight doesn’t appear overnight, and they know that.

It may help to reframe what happened at conference in your own mind. When you initially said you had complete trust in your partner, that wasn’t seen as you being dishonest , it was seen as understandable but incomplete insight. What matters more is what you do next with that realisation.

In terms of expressing that your views have genuinely changed, it’s less about saying the “right words” and more about consistently showing the following themes over time:

• Acknowledging that trust and risk are not the same thing
You can trust someone emotionally while still recognising that safeguards are needed because of their offence history.

• Being able to explain why risk exists, not just that it does
For example, understanding that risk isn’t about how he treats you, but about patterns, opportunity, boundaries, and vulnerability in children, especially babies.

• Showing that your baby’s safety would always override discomfort, loyalty or fear of consequences
Professionals want to hear that if something felt wrong, or a rule was breached, you would act immediately, even if that was hard.

• Demonstrating that you don’t rely on instinct alone
Talking about routines, supervision rules, who is present, what you would do if you felt overwhelmed, and how you would seek help shows practical protection, not just good intentions.

The 1–1 sessions you’ve been offered are actually a positive sign. They give you space to ask questions, process information properly, and show your thinking evolving in real time. Writing questions down in advance is a very good idea, it shows engagement, not defensiveness.

It’s also okay to be honest about the shift in your thinking. You don’t need to pretend you “always knew”. You can say something like:

“I realise now that I initially focused on who my partner is to me, rather than on what safeguarding a baby requires. I’m learning to separate emotional trust from protective responsibility, and I understand that my baby has to come first in every scenario.”

That kind of statement shows reflection.

And finally, please don’t underestimate this: insight is often demonstrated by behaviour over time, not by one assessment. Following rules consistently, maintaining boundaries, engaging with learning, and tolerating short-term separation or supervision arrangements all quietly build credibility.

I also want to add something separate that really helped me personally, that is the Lucy Faithfull Foundation. If you haven’t already, I would strongly recommend contacting them and joining their family support services. It’s free, confidential, and genuinely educational . They help you understand offending behaviour, risk patterns, and realistic safeguarding in a way that actually empowers you as a parent. For me, it was one of the most grounding parts of the process, because it gave me knowledge and understanding on why these things happened, why people do what they do and how to spot triggers. You also get to engage with others that are going through the same thing..that didn’t come from Children’s Services. They hold huge weight as well when comes to showing you have done something.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear moomoomeadows,

Thank you for your updating post. It is positive to hear that you have been offered 1 to 1 sessions designed to help you understand your partner’s offending behaviour. I really hope that these are helpful to you.

It is a good idea to prepare for these sessions and so the fact that you are planning to write down questions to ask shows that you want to use these sessions as effectively as possible.

You say that your views have changed since the beginning of the child protection process and you have realised that you may have been naïve. You feel that you do have a better understanding of the risk that your partner may pose, and hopefully over time this understanding will deepen.

You ask for advice about how you can show that your views have really changed and that you are not just saying what you think the professionals want to hear. I don’t think that it is helpful for me to suggest to you what you should or shouldn’t say because for it to be truly genuine it does need to be your own words and your own understanding of the situation, but I would agree that over time following the 1 to 1 sessions and your protective assessment you should have plenty of opportunities to show that you really do understand the risk that your partner may pose. Acknowledging that you were naïve previously, and that you did not understand the possible risk he posed, is helpful, as well as explaining what information helped you to change your views.

Ultimately the best advice I can give you is to be open and honest with the professionals involved and to work with them in a genuine manner so that you can get yourself in the best position to safeguard your baby when they are born.

I hope that this is helpful,

Best wishes,
Suzie

[moomoomeadows]

i underwent all my protective partnership work, it got squeezed into fewer sessions due to how far in my pregnancy i am.
At the end of the sessions she told me that she had no concerns with my ability to protect and supervise my partner around my baby which was a hugeeeee sigh of relief.
However, I've now been in talks with midwives and the safeguarding team and actually planning my birth.

Ive been told that my partner is not allowed to be on the antenatal or postnatal ward with me due to the likelihood of other children being present, which is whatever its something i expected, however once moved to the labour ward, he has to be escorted in by SECURITY to my room, and then escorted out once i move to the postnatal ward.
I understand this is to protect other people on the ward but it feels quite excessive to have security, rather than just a generic midwife who is looking after me? or even my second birth partner?

Ive also been told that before i get discharged, a discharge planning meeting needs to be held with social workers and midwives, i got a brief understanding on what this is but still not 100% sure, are you able to supply me with any further information on what this entails?

Furthermore, if i give birth on a Friday/saturday, ive been told ill have to stay in hospital until monday because social workers dont work the weekend so that meeting cant be held.
I feel like this is so unfair and punishing me, despite not being the one with the offending history? i'm not comfortable staying in hospital all weekend, and without my partner being allowed in there, i'm going to have to either be alone or constantly ask family/friends to come by for company. Not to mention, he then misses the first few days of his daughter's life just because i would've given birth on a day they don't work.
What is the point of this discharge meeting and why is it essential it gets done while in still in hospital? Ive tried to be super cooperative so far with social workers, midwives professionals etc but if i'm physically fine to go home after birth, i want to go home and spend my time in my own bed, in my own house with my daughter.
My partner isn't even allowed to live with us once shes born, and worst case he won't visit until that meeting is complete but i dont like the fact i might be forced to stay in hospital when all i want is to go home.

Any help, advice anything will be helpful please.

Dear moomoomeadows,

Thank you for your updating post. It is positive to hear that you have been offered 1 to 1 sessions designed to help you understand your partner’s offending behaviour. I really hope that these are helpful to you.

It is a good idea to prepare for these sessions and so the fact that you are planning to write down questions to ask shows that you want to use these sessions as effectively as possible.

You say that your views have changed since the beginning of the child protection process and you have realised that you may have been naïve. You feel that you do have a better understanding of the risk that your partner may pose, and hopefully over time this understanding will deepen.

You ask for advice about how you can show that your views have really changed and that you are not just saying what you think the professionals want to hear. I don’t think that it is helpful for me to suggest to you what you should or shouldn’t say because for it to be truly genuine it does need to be your own words and your own understanding of the situation, but I would agree that over time following the 1 to 1 sessions and your protective assessment you should have plenty of opportunities to show that you really do understand the risk that your partner may pose. Acknowledging that you were naïve previously, and that you did not understand the possible risk he posed, is helpful, as well as explaining what information helped you to change your views.

Ultimately the best advice I can give you is to be open and honest with the professionals involved and to work with them in a genuine manner so that you can get yourself in the best position to safeguard your baby when they are born.

I hope that this is helpful,

Best wishes,
Suzie

[Winter25]

Hi moomoomeadows,

First of all, take a massive breath and celebrate this victory well done You passed the protective parenting assessment. That is a huge, game-changing result. It proves that all your hard work, honesty, and reflection paid off. You have officially shown them you are a safe, protective mother.

Now, let's talk about the birth plan. I completely understand why these rules feel punishing and excessive, but you need to understand the hospital's logic so you can stop taking it personally and start outsmarting the system.

It feels embarrassing to have security escort your partner, but this is a resource issue, not a personal judgment on you.

Midwives are medical, not guards A midwife’s job is clinical care. They do not have the training, the legal authority, or the insurance to act as a "chaperone" for someone on the SOR.

Security handles this so the midwives can focus on delivering your baby. Your second birth partner has no legal authority to supervise him in a public hospital. My advice is Accept the security escort gracefully. It’s a 5-minute walk. Don’t waste your energy fighting a hospital policy that won't change.

This sounds intimidating, but it’s actually just a 15-minute "handover." Because your baby is on a Child Protection Plan, the hospital cannot legally release the baby until they "hand over" the safeguarding responsibility to the community Social Worker. They will likely dot he follwing

Confirm the baby is medically fit.
Confirm your partner is staying in his separate accommodation.
Confirm the date of the first home visit.

Once those boxes are ticked, you are free to go.

Social Services love to say, "You have to stay until Monday because we don't work weekends." This is totally not true

A hospital cannot legally imprison a medically fit mother and baby against their will. However, if you "abscond" (leave without the meeting), they can call the police and it will ruin your progress.

You do not fight this battle on a Saturday/ Sunday morning while you're exhausted. You fight it now by demanding an "Out-of-Hours Protocol." While your social worker doesn't work weekends, the Emergency Duty Team (EDT) works 24/7.

Send this email to the Social Worker and the Hospital's Safeguarding Midwife today:
-------------
Subject: URGENT: Pre-Birth Planning - Out of Hours / Weekend Discharge Protocol

Dear [Social Worker] and [Safeguarding Midwife],

I am writing to ensure my birth plan is finalized. As I have successfully passed my protective parenting assessment with no concerns, I want to ensure my discharge is handled proportionately.

I have been informed that if I give birth on a Friday or weekend, I may be required to remain in hospital until Monday to wait for a discharge meeting. As this would cause significant unnecessary stress to myself and my newborn, I am requesting that an 'Out of Hours' protocol is documented now.

Please confirm that if a discharge is required over a weekend, the hospital has the authority to liaise with the Emergency Duty Team (EDT) or an on-call manager to conduct the discharge meeting via phone, so my baby and I can return home as soon as we are medically fit.

I look forward to receiving this written protocol so I can focus on a calm, safe birth.

Kind regards,
[Your Name]

--------

You’ve done the hard part by passing the assessment. Now, just get the logistics pinned down.

======
For full transparency, I am not an official adviser. I am a parent with lived experience of the family court system, offering strategic guidance. Always consult with a solicitor regarding ongoing court proceedings.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear moomoomeadows,

Thank you for your updating post. This is Suzie here, the online adviser for Family Rights Group.

Congratulations on such a positive outcome for your protective partnership work. It is great to hear that you have been told that there are no concerns about your ability to protect and supervise your partner around your baby.

You are concerned about the fact that you have been told that your partner will need to be escorted by security staff to and from your room on the labour ward and would prefer that either a midwife or a second birth partner escorts him. As has been suggested by another forum user it may be that this is hospital protocol when working with someone who is seen as a possible risk and who will be on the hospital grounds. If you or your partner continue to feel uncomfortable about this then it may be helpful for you to have an open and transparent conversation with the social worker or a midwife and ask them to explain the reasoning behind this, and whether there is any room for negotiation.

You have been told that there will need to be a discharge planning meeting before you leave hospital with your baby. You would like to know what this entails. A discharge planning meeting is a standard process when a child on a child protection plan is under hospital care and is ready for discharge. The meeting will involve yourself, your baby’s father, hospital staff and a social worker. It is usually a short meeting to ensure that all the necessary support services and safety plans are in place to ensure that your baby will be safe once she leaves hospital. The purpose of the meeting is to prevent a child being discharged into an unsafe environment. It is very important that you do not leave before the meeting has taken place. If you leave before the meeting then the hospital will have a duty to contact children’s services or the police to report this and this will likely raise significant concerns about the baby’s safety.

And finally you are concerned that you have been told that if the baby is born at the weekend you will need to stay in the hospital until the Monday so that a social worker can attend the discharge planning meeting. As has been pointed out by another forum user, children’s services do operate an out-of-hours ‘emergency duty team’ over the weekends and during evenings and overnight. Therefore it is possible for a social worker from this team to attend the discharge planning meeting. It would be advisable to discuss this with the social worker or their manager sooner rather than later. It would be helpful to put your request in writing and ask clearly that if you do give birth at the weekend you wish for the emergency duty team to attend the discharge planning meeting. If you are told that this is not possible then I would suggest that you ask for a clear reason for this and you can then raise a formal complaint and escalate this if necessary. Please see HERE for more information about doing so. It may also be helpful to make sure that you have the emergency duty team contact number before you go into hospital so that if necessary you can ask the hospital staff to contact them on your behalf.

I hope that this is of some help. And if we do not hear from you before, I wish you all the best for the birth and a safe arrival for your daughter.

Best wishes,
Suzie