Scared

[sosseekingadvice]

My situation is i am 37 weeks pregnant and social services seem intent on taking my baby at present.

Like all situations it is complex. A referral was made about my partner by a talking therapies worker after he reached out for mental health support. The concerns are around mine and also my partners mental health diagnoses, my partner's struggle with alcohol (he is currently 3 months sober), domestic incidents between us and that we have elder children who are not in our care.

Our social worker contacted us less than three weeks ago. We have been cooperative with everything asked of us and there are no antenatal concerns about our baby. An ICPC was arranged which we attended. Less than two days before the ICPC we were given the social workers report to look through and also informed at the same time a PLO meeting has been scheduled and we could collect our PLO letter at the ICPC, leaving us only two working days to secure and prepare with solicitors for the meeting. I found a lot of errors in the report, one of which I was immediately able to prove and I also expressed my concerns to the chairperson as best I could in the limited 15 minutes that is afforded about how little time we have for preperation and that my partner was extremely ill prepared for the meeting and our IFSS worker had noted he needed a cognitive assessment which had not been noted at all. I reiterated the concerns best I could in the confrence itself. None of what I said seemed to matter at all. Despite this all four professionals, one of which had never even met us before, unanimously gave the opinion a child protection plan was required solely based around concerns of risk of emotional abuse regarding our history.

It feels like a decision has already been made to remove our baby from our care and that we have no rights at all in this situation.

I am going to be doing what I can to find a solicitor before the PLO meeting, of course. But it feels so hopeless with how things have progressed so far. I dont have faith any solicitor I find will want to fight for me.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

[winmau]

Hi, please look at your DMs

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Soseekingadvice,

Thank you for your post and welcome to the parents’ forum. I am Suzie, an online adviser replying to you today.

Congratulations on your pregnancy and good luck for the imminent birth. I am sorry to hear that you are in such stressful circumstances in the last few weeks of gestation.

Key to children’s services decision-making at this stage will be their assessment as to whether you and your partner are willing to engage with support and will work with the social worker on the concerns. This would reassure children’s services that your baby can be safe in your care, and your post demonstrates many positives. Your partner did the right thing in reaching out for mental health support, and it is testament to your honesty that you are so open about his previous alcohol use and that domestic incidents have occurred. Congratulations to your partner on his three months of abstinence.

Detailed information about public law outline procedures (sometimes called pre-proceedings) is here.

The public law outline meeting should focus on the support you will accept in terms of your mental health, continuing recovery from alcohol misuse and handling domestic disagreements safely. You should ask for children’s services assistance to secure this help.

Advice for parents and parents to be on how to find extra help and support is here.

You may find useful support from the perinatal mental health team in your area. The Royal Society of Psychiatrists have a useful information sheet on perinatal mental health services. You can link to it here. You can also ask your GP’s advice about local mental health resources.

Useful links on continuing recovery from substance use are here.

You can link to information from the Family Rights Group website on how children’s services should work with adults with mental ill-health here.

You mention that your partner may need a cognitive assessment. Children’s services have a duty to help a person with vulnerabilities to have support from an independent advocate. You can read more about working with advocates here.

Family Rights Group have prepared a template letter that you could use to request that children’s services help you and to find a suitable advocate. You can link to it here. Please look at letter 1.

Agencies that can support with work on avoiding domestic conflict and achieving healthy relationships are listed here.

You could also look at the information on Birth Companions website here.

It is vital that you and your partner talk with the social worker and social work team manager about safety planning for the early days, weeks and months following the birth of your baby, so that you are all clear about what is agreed and how risks will be managed.

As well as the support from health, social care and voluntary agencies you should discuss informal help available from family members or friends. You could ask the social worker to refer for a family group conference to be held as soon as is practical. Family group conference would be a way for the extended network around your baby to meet and focus on ways they could support the family. You can read more about family group conference here.

It was sad to read that you do not feel confident that you can find a solicitor to represent you well. The Law Society have a database that helps you search for lawyers in your area that accept legal aid work and have children’s law accreditation. You can link to it here.
A guide to working with a solicitor is here.
I hope this information was useful to you. Please feel free to post here again if you have further questions.

There are also many alternative ways to contact Family Rights Group if you seek further advice in the future:

• A free telephone advice line open Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 3pm (excluding Bank Holidays) on 0808 801 0366
• Easy-to-follow online information. Features include an A-Z, FAQs, films, ‘top tips’ and legal advice sheets;
• A webchat service where you can message an adviser online, who will help you find information and advice to support you.
• Complete the advice enquiry form to request an email response within 5 working days

Best wishes,
Suzie