Ending sgo

[Robin D]

An interesting report from the Local Government Ombudsman today. While specific to adoption, I am certain it can be used to apply leverage to Local Authorities in SGO cases as there are distinct similarities.

https://www.lgo.org.uk/information-cent ... dsman-says

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Sorry to hear that you have been through so much. Unfortunately we have already looked into other family members and we have come to a dead end. It has been an extremely hard decision to make but unfortunately it is our only option. I have had to take early retirement from work due to poor health and the stresses and strains have not helped the situation, we also have an 11 year old of our own and this has had a major impact on them. Us much as it pains me to do this I have no choice, I have to think about my health and my immediate family.

Dear Mummabear,
Welcome to the Kinship Carers’ Forum. I am sorry to hear about the stress you have been living under in these difficult circumstances. My name is Suzie and I am an online adviser responding to you today. I have not been able to reply to you before now, but I'm glad to see that you have had useful and timely peer support from Robin D. I will try to reply to each of your posts here.

You explain that you are a special guardian for your niece for the past 6 years and have an 11-year-old child in your care also. Following your setting of boundaries around your niece’s behaviour she left your home and refused to return. There was a long delay before children’s services became involved to help you resolve the situation and return her home. You then had a wait of 7 weeks for a response from children’s service on the further help you needed to keep your niece safe in your care. You also needed help with your own wellbeing and a consideration of the needs of your other child.

You write that although children’s services have now offered lots of support you feel it is too little and too late. Is there any scope for requesting a further meeting with the social worker who has outlined a support plan to talk the limitations of what is offered and if there is any other service or support that could be added to the plan? I appreciate that you may have already done this, but I am mindful that the social worker now working with you may be new to the situation and you are understandably exhausted by the ordeal of having to push for support and wait in uncertainty.

Family Rights Group have a guide to working with social workers which goes through points to consider in having your voice heard and working collaboratively. It may be useful to check through this to see if there is anything that you could add or request in your next conversation with the social worker. You can read the guide here.

You explained in your first post that you wanted similar advice to another poster in this thread whose enquiries have included bringing a special guardianship order to an end and exploring S.20 voluntary accommodation arrangements. There is further information about S.20 voluntary arrangements here.
The option of a voluntary arrangement may be raised where a family is struggling and a child being accommodated elsewhere could help prevent a crisis. You would not lose parental responsibility under a S.20 agreement. You can read more about this here

In terms of the possibility of ending the SGO. As it is a court order, it can only be ended by a court if they agree to end the order. You have a right to apply to end the SGO; but it does require a court application to formally revoke it. Only the court can discharge the special guardianship order, but it should not be a prior requirement to you receiving services or support from children’s services. Applying to end a special guardianship order is a private law application – you can get more advice on this from Child Law Advice.
I hope this information was useful to you.

There are many different ways to contact Family Rights Group if you seek further advice in the future:

• A free telephone advice line open Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 3pm (excluding Bank Holidays) on 0808 801 0366
• Easy-to-follow online information. Features include an A-Z, FAQs, films, ‘top tips’ and legal advice sheets;
• Online forums where families can receive advice, discuss issues, and find support;
• A webchat service where you can message an adviser online, who will help you find information and advice to support you.

Best wishes,
Suzie

[Mummabear]

When this first happened I was willing to have my niece back home but wanted supervised contact put in place with mum as she has been the cause of all our issues over the years. We have tried mediation on numerous occasions where mum has agreed to listen to what we have asked and stop going behind our back getting her daughter into trouble,but as soon as there is no one checking on things she goes back to her old ways. Social services refused to have this put in place saying it was impossible as mum lives in London and we live in Suffolk, so I then offered to supervise the contact myself as I already do so with dad but yet again this has been refused. My niece has now been at her friends house for 7 weeks and I feel that if she were to come back now things would definitely not be the same. She would run away as soon as she didn't like a consequence as she has got away with it all this time and I can't keep going through this. My own family and my health have to take priority here.social services are only offering help now because I have said I can't have her back home, if I was to have taken her back we wouldn't have been offered all this support, I have been asking for support for years and got nothing until I said I want to end my sgo.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

I've given this one last chance, met the rypp lady who seemed lovely...she's met with me twice and gd twice and is now off sick apparently there are no other rypp workers currently available, I understand people can't help being sick but considering this really is the last chance social services have no sense of urgency nor do they appear to care!
Gd has yet again upped her violence I've been ringing support worker, kinship team and social services every day but no one is available I'm beginning to think that just packing gd belongings and depositing her on social services doorstep is my only option at this point!

Dear Mumof4,
Thank you for your further post. I am glad to hear that the Respect Young Persons’ Programme (RYPP) is someone you feel you can work with and dismayed to read that she is now on sick leave and there does not seem to be a plan in place for you to receive alternative support in her absence.
You write that after everything you have endured, and all the waiting and uncertainty the RYPP intervention is the last chance that children’s services have to avert a crisis. If you have not done so already you should email the RYPP team manager and share the information that this is a critical ‘last chance’ stage and that your granddaughter’s violence has escalated.
It may also help to contact your local councillor for support on this issue. Sometimes councillors can bring pressure to bear on children’s services management in the interests of their constituents. You can find the contact details of your local councillor here. You put your postcode into the database to find the correct information. It may also help to contact the councillor who has cabinet responsibility for children and families. (You can find out the name of the councillor for children and families on your local council website.)
You could also consider contacting your MP and their caseworkers. You can link to a database to find the contact details for your MP here.
I hope this helps.
Best wishes,
Suzie

[Mumof4]

So the rypp program isn't working, gd won't engage which I did express before it starred, the lady said she will speak to her superior and get back to me but that was last Tues it's now over a week and I've heard nothing, I spoke to family support yesterday about how gd behaviour is escalating again she said she would go and see gd in school first thing this morning then ring me, we'll she hasn't seen gd I've text her and heard noth8ng.
Of course I understand how busy these people are but when someone is at breaking point, gd behaviour is escalating I honestly do not understand their lack of urgency! I've decided now to go to the court where the sgo was granted and request the form to terminate the sgo, I'm just going round & round in circles with family support etc

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Mumof4,

I am so sorry to hear about that things are no better for you since you last posted here. You write that your granddaughter is reluctant to engage with the Respect Young Persons’ Programme (RYPP). It’s good that you spoke to the project manager, and I can very much hope that you hear back from this manager soon with their thoughts as to how to encourage your granddaughter to begin the programme. You are also waiting to hear back from the family support worker. I appreciate that you have been waiting for professionals’ responses and feeling at breaking point for a lengthy time.

I was wondering if a project at Kinship (the charity that supports family carers) would be helpful to you. It’s called ‘Someone like Me’ and is offered by peer volunteers who are kinship carers too. The staff at Kinship match people who want support to someone who has experience of their situation.
You can link to Kinship's website here.
Someone Like Me ishere. Under this scheme you can be matched with another kinship carer who has experience of a similar situation and who can offer telephone support for up to three sessions.

Family Rights Group offer a free telephone advice line open Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 3pm (excluding Bank Holidays) on 0808 801 0366.
It might help to talk things over with an experienced adviser; to be heard and have someone help you think through your next steps.

I am also reposting details of helplines that you can contact out of hours for emotional support.
• Samaritans contact details are here.
• Campaign against living miserably is here.
• Shout text service is here.

Best wishes,
Suzie

[Mumof4]

Thanks Suzie I'll have a look

[Mumof4]

I am so so upset, I looked after my 3 yr old grandson for 2 nights last weekend as my other daughter was having her 2nd baby, gd did nothing but shout * scream and abuse me the whole time, pushed my gs around shouted and called him names one of my boys nearly lost it with gd because of her disgusting behaviour.
I had spoken to gd a few times about us looking after gs beforehand so although I understand her need for control it was an awful time for all of us, my son in law has now said he will not allow us when gd is here because of the affect it's had on him, gs is now calling his parents idiots, lashing out and shouting every at them...copying gd.
I have such a close relationship with gs and have always seen him at least once a week but now quite rightly he isn't allowed here when gs is home
She never goes anywhere as no one ever looks after her.
This is an unlikeable, unmanageable situation now

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Mumof4,

I am so sorry to hear of your continuing difficulties. I hope that you heard back from the RYPP (Respect Young Persons Programme) manager.

If you are still unsupported you could consider contacting your local councillor and/ or local MP to ask them to help you advocate for the consistent help the child you are raising needs.

You can use this database to find the contact details for your local ward councillor here. You put your postcode into the search box. You could also look on your council website to find the contact details for the local councillor with cabinet responsibility for children and families.
You can look up the contact details for your local member of parliament on this database here.

Many services will be closing for the Christmas holiday next week.
Family Rights Group office and advice line will close at 3pm on Tuesday 24 December 2024.Our office and advice services will re-open at 9.30am on Thursday 2 January 2025.
Full details of the Family Rights Group closure are here. Details of support agencies that remain open over the holiday period are also listed via this link.

Best wishes,
Suzie

[Mumof4]

So christmas is out of the way and the lady from rypp has started working with gd again, the lady has spoken to her manager about gd not engaging and has been told to 'keep at it'
She saw gd in school last fri and played uno with her as she won't engage at all!
I finally have my C1 form but am confused on how to fill it in, would the citizens advice help me does anyone know?
Gd mum has said she will have gd live with her and I should just take gd there but there's schooling etc to think about, also I don't think mum would cope and gd treats her as badly as me.
Family support worker called a 'jag'? Meeting before Christmas but the last time I saw her 2 weeks ago she didn't know what was happening I text support worker a week ago and have heard nothing so again no support.