Partner arrested for iioc

[Terrifiedparent]

Nothing at all, more waiting around. Getting more and more frustrated as the days go by

[Need help 2021]

It’s craY honestly you just don’t know wht to do and if you was to say something they would say you don’t understand the risks

[Toughlife]

It’s craY honestly you just don’t know wht to do and if you was to say something they would say you don’t understand the risks

I was in a similar situation last year and the police investigation took about 8 months. The social services did not allow me unsupervised contact with my kids. The case went to court and I pleaded guilty and was convicted. I am not happy with myself and what I put my family through especially when my story was put in the local papers. After 3 months of probation, my probation officer put a referral to social services to allow unsupervised access and that has been allowed. I can take my kids anywhere on my own and baby sit them as well on my own. They have closed our case now. I hope that your situation may improve as well.
I regret what I did and I have paid a huge price for my offence but I need to find the energy to move on and be a better dad and husband. I hope that in future I will help those people who will find themselves in situations as myself.

[TractorMad]

Hey, Im in pretty much the same position as you. My ex husband was arrested last October for downloading pictures from the Kik app. He says he thought it was just a porn app and downloaded the images accidentally. The case went to magistrates in June to be referred to crown and thats when ss got involved. I have 2 children, boy 9 and girl 11, ex husband isnt girls bio Dad but she used to see him every week. She now isn't allowed to see him and my son is allowed only supervised contact and no overnight stays. Weve had various ss meetings and 2 home visits and there are no concerns for my children aside from what my ex has done. The Crown court case is in September so its taken nearly a year to get to this point. I honestly just want SS out of my life. SS have made it clear I cant be showing any support to my ex or they will question whether I can keep my kids safe. In my eyes I dont want my kids to lose us so Im keeping my mouth closed but he was the best Dad until all this. He will be sentenced next month and we will see what will be

[Dead man walking]

Hi I've also recently been arrested under suspicion for iioc RUI at the minute. Since then my world has fell apart, I've lost everything I love. Wife, Son (apart from twice a week for 1hr (supervised contact) been made homless (in shared accommodation for now) and lost my job. ss have bullied my partner to end the realitionship and offered her no support whatsoever only judgement when she's done nothing wrong, and the most amazing Mam in the world to our young Son(and they know it).I hate myself for what I'm putting my partner and son through and truly ashamed and discusted in myself for what I've done. I'm starting private
therapy soon. I've tried to take my own life twice so far since this and just don't know how I'm supposed to carry on. I'm petrified of what's to come with sentence media, sor, shpo, It breaks me the thought of never having a normal relationship with my son and living a normal life, I feel like I'm in hell and the punishment is never ending I'm at rock bottom and don't see any future .

[Sosad]

Hello, I’m new on here and had to write after reading all the above posts because I’m going through a nightmare.
I am an older woman aged 56 with 2 grown up children who no longer live at home. I brought up my kids as a single parent. Five years ago I met my soulmate. We had a fantastic time and my friends, family and work colleagues absolutely loved him. Last year we got engaged and I finally thought I was getting the future I’d only dreamed of. I sold my house and 8 weeks ago we pooled our money and bought a home together. I also took early retirement from my job and planned my wedding which was supposed to be in 10 weeks time. My future was supposed to be so happy with lots of holidays and financial security.
All this was ripped away from me 3 weeks ago when the police knocked on the door at 7 am and arrested my partner for downloading and uploading indecent photos and videos. When he returned home he said that he hadn’t done it and that they won’t find anything on his phone etc. The police have told me that they have intelligence that says he has done this and that even if his phone is clear he has done it but they can’t prove it. I was told that without the evidence from his phone he wouldn’t be charged even though they have the intelligence! I have a grand daughter and social care rang my daughter to inform her. This whole thing has devastated me. Ive lost the man I love, given up my job, sold my house, cancelled my wedding and had my secure happy future ripped away from me. My children are absolutely furious and don’t understand that I miss him and the future we were on the brink of sharing together. They say he is a vile, evil monster and my son has spoken to a solicitor who has said that sharing images is more serious than downloading.
I am absolutely distraught . I’ve left our home and living out of suitcases. I am disgusted by what he’s done and know that I can never be with him again but I can’t bring myself to hate him . I just wish it would all go away. 3 weeks ago I had everything… a new home, early retirement and a wedding in a few weeks. Now I’ve lost it all. I’ve got great friends and fabulous children but they all think I should hate him and right now I just can’t
Also, if he is convicted what sentence is given for possession and distribution of cat a images and videos??

[Bigsmall15]

Good afternoon

My partner is recently going through similar I have children and he's been bailed to my address I believe he's innocent we are under social services aswell the police was happy to have him bailed here with us. My question is his ex is refusing him contact with his son of 3years old we have been told the case has been extended til February can she refuse contact because its a long time to not see his child and we miss him.

[Sosad]

Hello Bigsmall15,
The problem here is the same as I had to come to terms with. The police don’t come knocking on your door unless they are confident that they have accurate intelligence. Yes they need the evidence from phones etc but not finding anything only means no proof, not innocent. I was told that there is so much of this online problem that the police only have time to go after the worst. I know it’s horrible to accept and I’d give anything to be wrong about my fiancé . Sending you lots of virtual hugs.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Bigsmall15,

Welcome to the parents' board and thank you for your post.

You say your partner has been arrested for possession of indecent images of children and has been bailed to your address. You have children and children's services are involved. His ex-partner is not allowing him contact with his 3 year old child and you would like to know if she can do this.

If the child's mother thinks that allowing contact could put her child at risk, she is justified in stopping contact. In this case, your partner's arrest would give her reasonable grounds to do this. Does your partner's child have a social worker? If children's services are involved, it may be that they have advised her to disallow contact. If there is a social worker involved, your partner may want to talk to them about the possibility of supervised contact taking place and how this may be facilitated if it is safe and in the best interest's of the child. Ultimately, all contact has to be in the child's best interests.

Your partner may also want to consult a solicitor regarding the possibility of applying to the courts for a child arrangements order - this means that a judge will look at the case and make a decision as to what contact, if any, should take place. He can also contact Child Law Advice on 0300 330 5480 for some free advice on this.

Best wishes,

Suzie.

[Pink Popcorn]

This is happening to me right now and I’m absolutely terrified. We have a baby. I’m waiting for SS to get in touch and I’m absolutely terrified about what will happen. I’ve moved out with her and I’m living with my Mum. I love my partner to death and I want to stick by him but I will do whatever in my power to keep my daughter safe and with me.

I’ve seen a lady post on here that her partners offences were on Kik messenger, this is the case for my partner also, this happened before we got together last year. He said a file was sent to a group he was in and he downloaded the file, he said he felt sick to his stomach when he opened it and deleted it straight away.

I’m just so so scared. If any of you ladies would like to talk at any time please message me, I could do with someone to talk to.