Child protection investigation

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Joined: Tue Dec 14, 2021 6:02 am

Child protection investigation

Post by RWQ789 » Thu Feb 24, 2022 4:58 pm

So my first experience with social services my boyfriend choked me and my 15yo rang the police , second time he put a brick through my window and climbed in to tell me he loves me , my 4 kids was then put on a children in need plan and I found out I was pregnant with his baby , before I could be signed off I was told I needed to get a restraining order which I didn’t want to do but did it anyway to make her go away , two weeks ago I allowed my ex to baby sit baby for 3 hours whilst I went out , seeing as we had been on good terms since the birth I thought it would be ok , anyway I come in about 10pm and he calls me a slag and kicks me in the head repeatedly until I scream for my daughter to ring the police , he is on tag for breech of an order which he pled guilty to and he pled not guilty to assault and it’s going to trial , I don’t want to go to trial but iv just been informed that my two teenage daughters and baby are under a child protection investigation , my twins are not because they wasn’t here , one of my daughters didn’t know what had happened till the next day , anyway I rang social services myself the day after the assault and contacted idva and I feel like I’m being victim blamed , I just wanted to have a good relationship like I do with the other kids dads and obviously it’s back fired so I clearly won’t be doing that again, I do love this man and I feel incredibly guilty that he may go to jail but I’m also concerned that he will drag my name through the mud like he has over the past two years with his lies and people believe him , I want to retract my statement but now im scared that social worker will take a dim view on it as if I’m not safe guarding my kids , to be honest it’s bull **** , I wasn’t informed the cin plan was voluntary either and they did nothing but teams meetings once a month saying there is nothing up with my kids , they are not affected they would just say there ***** off with this woman interfering in their lives at school and they are not his kids either , I can understand with the baby but I definitely feel more should be focused on him , I don’t need a parenting course I work full time and raise five kids alone , I was assaulted but now investigated , im pretty mad and insulted , I want to know what they are hoping to achieve and will me dropping charges affect anything ?

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Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2021 7:51 pm

Re: Child protection investigation

Post by Lemon1 » Tue Mar 01, 2022 8:14 pm

Hey , I’m in a similar situation . I have 2 children (not his) but pregnant with his child. He’s still on remand, trial starts in June. You can’t drop the charges unfortunately, however if you contact the police and tell them you will not be supporting the prosecution they will come and take another statement and ask you why! I highly doubt the cps with drop the charges that is down to the police. Even though they won’t use your statement in court they can use body cam evidence etc.SS asked me why I said I wasn’t supporting the court. I told them I would like him to attend courses to change his behaviour instead as I still want to be in a relationship with him in the future ONLY if I see hes changed. Aslong as youre honest with them and keep him away from your children they will support you. I made the mistake of letting him back into my home after the first involvement with SS and it’s gone against me because they think I can’t be trusted. He needs to engage with social care as well and do everything they say, it’s a good idea for him to get a family law solicitor if he’s wanting access. It’s a horrible situation to be in I really feel for you. If you would like any further help you can send me a direct message xx

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Re: Child protection investigation

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Mar 07, 2022 4:11 pm

Dear RWQ789,

Welcome to the parents’ board and thank you for your post.

You say in your post that your boyfriend choked you, and that your 15 year old rang the police. On a second occasion, he threw a brick through your window. Your 4 children were placed on a child in need plan and you then became pregnant with his child. You say you then got a restraining order against your partner, which you were told to do but did not want to. Two weeks ago, you allowed your ex to look after your baby for 3 hours whilst you went out – when you returned he verbally and physically assaulted you and your daughter had to phone the police. He was on tag for breech of an order and he is now going to trial after pleading not guilty to assault. You say you do not want to go to trial, but have been informed that your two teenage daughters and baby are subject to a child protection investigation. Your twins are not as they were not present. You have contact children’s services and say that you feel like you are being victim blamed. You wanted a good relationship with your ex-partner and say that you still love him. You want to retract your statement but are worried that the social worker will take the view that you are not safeguarding your children. You do not agree with children’s services involvement and want to know whether dropping charges will affect anything.

Firstly, it is important to acknowledge that some of your children are subject to a child protection investigation as children’s services are worried that they have suffered significant harm or are at risk of significant harm. This is due to your ex-partner’s behaviour. Whilst it is not your fault that your ex-partner assaulted you, children’s services will now expect you to act as a protective parent to ensure that your children’s safety is the top priority. They may ask you to take steps such as stopping all contact with him and engaging with domestic abuse services. It is very important that during the assessment period you engage meaningfully with the social worker and communicate any support you think may be useful to you and your children. If your children are placed on a child protection plan, this will aim to address any risks that are identified. Take a look here for more information on child protection procedures. Please note that if children’s services have concerns that you are not taking steps to keep your children safe, they may escalate their involvement. This could mean initiating pre-proceedings or even applying to the courts. You can read more about this here.

You also asked whether withdrawing your statement to the police is likely to change anything – only you can make the decision as to whether you do this or not, but keep in mind that your ex-partner can still be trialled even if you withdraw your evidence. Children’s services may also take the view that you are minimising the risk that your ex-partner poses and are not taking all the necessary steps to ensure that he does not harm you or your children again. If you feel under any pressure to withdraw your statement from your ex-partner or anyone else, you can speak to the social worker or police about this.

You may also find it helpful to take a look at our webpage on domestic abuse, with links to other organisations you may find helpful.

I hope you have found this helpful.

Best wishes,


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