SGO (MGP) - Please help - MGP have stopped all communication.

[Forthechildren]

Dear All,

key*
MGP - maternal grandparents
MGD - Maternal grandad
SGO - special guardianship order

I am the father writing for guidance on how to gain contact with my children.

After 1 year and 9 months my children were finally rescued out of foster care and placed with their maternal grandparents who were granted SGO until the children are 18 years of age.

The 26 weeks child in need plan has now ended, the local authority has ceased all involvement.
Most would say - this is the best news ever as now the MGP have total control over contact and any normal MGP would want their grandchildren to see their parents as much as possible - so what's the problem right?

Well I assumed the same, however the MGD only cares about religion. As I am not 'Muslim' like he is (MGD) so he thinks it is a good enough reason to not let me see the children or have any contact with them at all. I have been blocked on all media I cannot even get a phone call to speak to my kids. Further more not even the mother can see them, as his reason is: if she is talking to me then she cannot see them ( because I am not Muslim). What a disgusting thought process - as any mature, educated adult would understand no matter what the marital or relationship status, the best thing for parents to have is to have GOOD COMMUNICATION - it is our duty that we owe to our children, as we decided to have them.

I cannot get advise from the LA as they just say they have ceased involvement.

I want to know what I can do legally to see my children and as often as possible. Whenever I am not working, and the children are not at nursery I should be able to see them under his supervision - I see no issue with this as he is elderly so to be frank I would be giving him much needed respite, just to repeat he has been given total power to decide when contact is - so there is no limit, it can literally be every single day if he says yes (under his supervision).

The MGP are retired, neither of them speak good English, the maternal grandmother not at all.

I appreciate that my children did not go into foster care for us to never have any contact with them at all, however this is vital time I am missing they are only 3 and 1 years old. These times will never come back - I have always tried to be the best father I can be, I worked full time however was with my first son every single day after work and on weekends I would take him out with myself to go see friends and family, apart from work I was never NOT with my child. My son did not know sugar even existed, I fed him chicken/salmon/beef with broccoli and potatoes every single day and no crisps or biscuits of any kind, kept him active in the out doors and educated him too with counting, reading and general conversations about how the world works, watched blippy and other educational children's programs.

My second son was only 3 months when he was kidnapped by LA and taken into foster care (thus I did not get to have the same amount of time spent with him) while the older one was just 1.5 years old and was aware of what he was going through, and it has affected him badly.

I feel like I have a lot more to offer my sons than the MGP who merely were a safety net to keep the children in the family. I am educated, fit and healthy, punctual, financially stable and willing to do whatever it takes to get my children back. My older son's English has deteriorated while he has been with MGP, he is being given sugar every single day regardless of both his grandparents paternal and maternal having diabetes. He does not get any outdoors experience, nor does he have communication with other children his age, apart from when he is at nursery. Some may say this is okay, however I am not fine with just the bare minimum being done, I didn't have children just to keep them alive through low quality input of food, effort and time spent - if that were the case I would be happy just feeding penguins as that is how I see the level of care he is receiving now - literally just kept alive through BS foods and sent to nursery - not good enough.

For now though to be realistic I would just like any advice to have regular contact with my children - how can I legally get this put down on paper, or how can I get a social worker to advice this demented man that no religion can reward you for keeping children away from their parents - if anything it is a SIN to do so because you are robbing them of the love and relationship with their parents especially their mother (his own daughter).

Kind regards,

Forthechildren

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Forthechildren

Thank you for your post and welcome to the board.

In response to your main question about contact with your children who live with relatives under a special guardianship order (SGO) please read our advice sheet about what birth parents might expect when an SGO is made, you can find the advice sheet here.

To ‘formally’ apply to the courts for contact you will require leave/permission (see the advice sheet above) – the order you may seek is called a Child Arrangements Order. Further advice or help might be sought from Child Law Advice they give legal advice in family matters.

I hope this information is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie