My Parenting Assessment

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Joined: Mon Dec 03, 2018 12:31 pm

My Parenting Assessment

Post by Bmommy196 » Wed Jan 09, 2019 3:54 pm

DNA in June 2018 has confirmed My son is the father little boy born March 2018. The baby was placed in care as soon as he was born because of serious concerns about the mother.
Once it was confirmed my son was the father, the baby's mother made serious allegations against my son of Domestic violence and sexual assault. She even stated she had an injunction against my son.
The courts ordered a police check on my son this came back with nothing at all to support her claims. She then stated my son had used a false name. Eventually we found out that the allegations related to another of her ex-boyfriends. The mother admitted in court that she had got confused and my son had never done anything to her. The mother has made similar allegations of sexual abuse against male nursing staff at the local mental health hospital.
However, we do think from the way the SW view of my son was tainted after hearing the allegations and despite the mother admitting my son had not done anything her view is still negative towards my son.
The mother has not attended any contact sessions for the last 6 months – she is pregnant again to someone else and wants to focus on the new baby. SW has confirmed this baby will also be placed in care as soon as it is born.
Supervised contact with the baby, my son and me commenced and has gone well. The assessment mentions the positive interaction and warmth.
The parenting assessment on the mother was very negative and there is no way the Baby will be placed with her.
SW and guardian asked my husband and I if we would be prepared to be the baby’s long-time carers. We are both over 60 and not in the best of health. We explained that we would not be able to offer full time care but would be there to offer our son lots of support. In addition, my younger son and his partner live local to where our older son lives so lots of family local and ready to offer support.
A parenting assessment has been done on my son to see if he can care for the baby. The recommendation is that the baby be placed for adoption.
We have read through the assessment and the reasons for not placing the baby with my son are: -
1) My son is disabled and needs to use a walking stick. They have concerns whether he would be able to carry the baby upstairs.
2) My son lives in private rented accommodation. He was in a bedsit but when he realised that there was a possibility of the baby coming to live with him, he managed to get a 3 bedroomed house. The assessment has deemed the house unsuitable for the baby because the roof is leaking and one of the bedrooms is damp. The room intended for the baby has already been decorated. The carpet on the floor downstairs is very worn and needs replacing.
3) My son is unemployed and the SW questions whether my son would be able to provide for the baby financially.
Apart from that there are no other negatives. My question is are these legitimate reasons for putting the baby up for adoption.
A) Surely, they should offer support if his disability is a concern.
B) If his accommodation is unsuitable surely, they should support my son to get the landlord to do the necessary repairs. Or even rehome him in a council property.
C) Can they prevent him being a long-term carer because he is in receipt of benefits?
Look forward to any advice anyone can give us.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: My Parenting Assessment

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jan 16, 2019 5:54 pm

Dear Bmommy196

Welcome to the discussion forum and thank you for your post.

My name is Suzie, online adviser at Family Rights Group.

From your post it seems that your son is currently involved in care proceedings in relation to his son. DNA confirmed him to be the father and he has since had a parenting assessment carried out by the social worker. I do not know what stage the case has reached but it might be possible for your son to ask for an independent social work assessment to be done if he believes the social worker was not impartial or was biased because of what was said about him earlier on in the case.

I have read the points you have set out as the reasons given for your son not being able to parent his son. If these are really the only reasons then his solicitor should be able to challenge these. It is important to know the extent of your son’s disability as you have only mentioned that he uses a walking stick. Does he have a social worker himself, because of his disability and, if so, did this person feed into the assessment? A disability is not in itself a reason to say a parent cannot parent a child so a lot depends, I think, on the nature of your son’s disability. Was any assessment done to establish what sort of support he might need to be able to look after his son?

Adoption should normally be considered when nothing else will do. From what you say your son has a supportive family network to help him bringing up his child. Would he be able to move in with you for a period of time especially whilst baby is still young? What about his younger brother, would he consider being assessed? I do not know his age but he could ask to be assessed, if he is willing to be considered.

Please read our advice sheet Care (and related) proceedings which you may find helpful in relation to the ongoing court proceedings.

The housing situation also in itself should not be a reason for a baby to be adopted out of its birth family and children’s services could certainly consider assisting your son to get more suitable accommodation.

To say that a parent cannot provide for their child because they are in receipt of benefit does not really, I think, make a lot of sense since there are a substantial number of parents on benefits who have their children in their care.
Your son and your grandson have a right to family life and to discriminate on the grounds of his disability may be a breach of his human rights. I suggest he discuss this with his solicitor.

I can only advise on the basis of the information you have provided. I think your son should ask the local authority about their protocol for working with disabled parents. He might also wish to contact Scope who provides advice and support for parents with a disability.
The Equality and Human Rights Commission or the Equality Advisory Support Services may able be able to be of assistance. Also, Disability Rights UK may be able to offer advice and support.

I hope this information is helpful but if you wish to speak to an adviser, please telephone our advice service on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday.

Best wishes


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