Hello,
I’m reaching out as I really just need some advice. I’ve never been involved with social services before this is my first time. I have one child, he’s under 5 and diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder.
I have met a new partner, been together 9 months, he doesn’t live with me but has been around my child and I’ve never had any concerns about this. All my family have met him and around my child and they have no concerns either, the childminder has also met him and has no concerns.
They rang me around 7 months ago letting me know about an accused incident from his ex of common assault from over a year ago. I have been aware about this since the start of the relationship and aware no charges have been brought to him. I never heard anything since they dropped it.
Now I’ve had another phone call due to them having another referral from his social in a different city explaining that he’s been asked to leave the family home due to shouting and the youngest sibling hearing it and not liking it. He does shout at his family home as he has arguments with his dad which they have both admitted too however my Partner hasn’t lived at his family home for nearly 10 months now so there’s been no shouting for 10 months at all in that household.
My social in our city we live in now think it’s best to be sent to the assessment team. My partner is working with services for mental heath and the accused common assault. He’s aware of his own actions and is already seeking the help for these with courses.
I’m worried of what could come from this? He’s no risk to my me or my child I was in a dv relationship for 3 years I’m very much aware of the signs. Just kind of getting advice of the best ways to go about this.. I did let them know he will be moving in with me soon and they didn’t say he couldn’t or he had to stay away from my child at the moment.. should I be worried?? My child is looked after and loves my new partner after having an absent father! I’m happy for them to come out and see this for themselves.
First time and worried!
Re: First time and worried!
Hi Mummyof1x,
I’m really glad you posted, because situations like this feel much scarier than they actually are when you’re new to children’s services involvement. I’ll try to ground this with some clear facts as well as reassurance for you . This time of year you do not need to be worried
First, the legal position (this is important):
Social services cannot take a child away simply because a parent has a new partner, historic allegations, or concerns raised in a different household. For any removal or serious action, they would have to show that your child is currently suffering or likely to suffer significant harm. Nothing you’ve described so far comes anywhere near that threshold.
A Child in Need or assessment-team referral is not a child protection investigation. It does not mean they think you’re an unsafe parent. It means they are checking whether there is any need for support or safeguarding given information they’ve received. Most of these assessments end with “no further action” or a note on file unless something is going on right now, even then it can be delt with.
About your partner:
– The alleged common assault was historic and resulted in no charges. That matters.
– The shouting concerns relate to a household your partner no longer lives in.
– There is no allegation of harm to your child, and no allegation involving you.
– He is already engaging with mental health support and courses, which is seen as a protective factor, not a risk.
Social services are allowed to consider historic information, consider being the operative word here, but they cannot treat it as evidence of current risk without something happening now. Historic, unproven concerns alone are not enough to justify intervention.
The fact they didn’t tell you to stop contact or delay moving in is very telling.
If they believed your partner posed a risk to your child, they would have been explicit about this immediately. The absence of any restriction is one of the strongest signs that this is low-level and precautionary.
Your child being autistic does not lower your rights as a parent.
Sometimes families worry that autism automatically brings extra scrutiny. It doesn’t. What it does mean is that social workers should take extra care to understand routine, stability, and emotional safety, which you clearly already provide.
What this assessment is really about:
They are checking:
– That you understand the information they’ve received
– That you can recognise risk and protect your child if needed
– That your home environment is safe and stable
– That you have support and insight
You clearly meet all of these.
What you can say (if helpful):
If you feel anxious, it’s perfectly okay to put things calmly in writing. For example:
“I’m happy to engage with an assessment. I want to be clear that there have been no incidents involving my child, no concerns raised by professionals who know him, and no concerns about my partner’s behaviour in my home. I’m confident in my ability to safeguard my child and welcome the opportunity for you to see this.”
That’s not defensive, it’s clear, protective parenting OK.
What not to do:
Don’t over-explain, don’t speculate, and don’t downplay your own strength as a parent. You don’t need to prove anything extraordinary. “Ordinary safe parenting” is enough.
Most likely outcomes: ( this is my opinion only)
– Assessment completed
– No safeguarding concerns identified
– Case closed, or at most signposting to voluntary support
Removal is not a realistic outcome here right now based on what you said. Nothing here meets any type of threshold for that
Try to hold onto the fact that this is a check, not a judgement.
-----------
For full transparency: I am not an official adviser. I am a parent who has successfully navigated a long, complex legal battle with a Local Authority, and I share guidance based on that lived experience. You are always the final decision-maker for your family. You decide what advice to follow
I’m really glad you posted, because situations like this feel much scarier than they actually are when you’re new to children’s services involvement. I’ll try to ground this with some clear facts as well as reassurance for you . This time of year you do not need to be worried
First, the legal position (this is important):
Social services cannot take a child away simply because a parent has a new partner, historic allegations, or concerns raised in a different household. For any removal or serious action, they would have to show that your child is currently suffering or likely to suffer significant harm. Nothing you’ve described so far comes anywhere near that threshold.
A Child in Need or assessment-team referral is not a child protection investigation. It does not mean they think you’re an unsafe parent. It means they are checking whether there is any need for support or safeguarding given information they’ve received. Most of these assessments end with “no further action” or a note on file unless something is going on right now, even then it can be delt with.
About your partner:
– The alleged common assault was historic and resulted in no charges. That matters.
– The shouting concerns relate to a household your partner no longer lives in.
– There is no allegation of harm to your child, and no allegation involving you.
– He is already engaging with mental health support and courses, which is seen as a protective factor, not a risk.
Social services are allowed to consider historic information, consider being the operative word here, but they cannot treat it as evidence of current risk without something happening now. Historic, unproven concerns alone are not enough to justify intervention.
The fact they didn’t tell you to stop contact or delay moving in is very telling.
If they believed your partner posed a risk to your child, they would have been explicit about this immediately. The absence of any restriction is one of the strongest signs that this is low-level and precautionary.
Your child being autistic does not lower your rights as a parent.
Sometimes families worry that autism automatically brings extra scrutiny. It doesn’t. What it does mean is that social workers should take extra care to understand routine, stability, and emotional safety, which you clearly already provide.
What this assessment is really about:
They are checking:
– That you understand the information they’ve received
– That you can recognise risk and protect your child if needed
– That your home environment is safe and stable
– That you have support and insight
You clearly meet all of these.
What you can say (if helpful):
If you feel anxious, it’s perfectly okay to put things calmly in writing. For example:
“I’m happy to engage with an assessment. I want to be clear that there have been no incidents involving my child, no concerns raised by professionals who know him, and no concerns about my partner’s behaviour in my home. I’m confident in my ability to safeguard my child and welcome the opportunity for you to see this.”
That’s not defensive, it’s clear, protective parenting OK.
What not to do:
Don’t over-explain, don’t speculate, and don’t downplay your own strength as a parent. You don’t need to prove anything extraordinary. “Ordinary safe parenting” is enough.
Most likely outcomes: ( this is my opinion only)
– Assessment completed
– No safeguarding concerns identified
– Case closed, or at most signposting to voluntary support
Removal is not a realistic outcome here right now based on what you said. Nothing here meets any type of threshold for that
Try to hold onto the fact that this is a check, not a judgement.
-----------
For full transparency: I am not an official adviser. I am a parent who has successfully navigated a long, complex legal battle with a Local Authority, and I share guidance based on that lived experience. You are always the final decision-maker for your family. You decide what advice to follow
Re: First time and worried!
Thank you so much for this! You’ve calmed me down a lot so I really appreciate that! I was meant to have a social worker contact me within 24 hours but it’s been 3 days and heard nothing from them which also puts my mind at ease!
Thank you so much again x
Thank you so much again x
-
Suzie, FRG Adviser
- Posts: 4823
- Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:57 pm
Re: First time and worried!
Dear Mummyof1x,
Welcome to the parents’ forum and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie and I am the online adviser for Family Rights Group. I will be responding to your posts today. I hope that the following advice and information is helpful to you. You can click on the links in my post to take you to more advice and information on our website.
You have explained that children’s services are carrying out section 47 enquiries. This is also known as a child protection investigation. When children’s services have information which suggests that a child might be at risk of significant harm they have a legal duty to carry out these enquiries. In your case, it seems that the information children’s services have been given about your partner, has led them to be concerned that your son might be at risk of harm.
We have information on our website HERE about child protection investigations. It might be helpful for you to read through it so that you understand how the process works, what your rights are, and how children’s service should work with you.
You have explained that the social worker asked you to sign a document to agree that your partner does not live with you, does not see your child unless in public, and that you agree to the children’s services assessment being carried out. This document is sometimes known as a ’written agreement’ and, as you are aware, these are not legally binding. You have explained that you decided not to sign this document and that although the social worker initially said that they would be seeking legal advice about this, their manager has decided that this is not necessary at the moment.
I think it is important here to explain that when a social worker or manager says that they will ‘seek legal advice’ this means that they will be taking advice from the legal team who work for children’s services. The legal team will advise whether they feel that the threshold has been met for a higher level of intervention. This would be to consider whether children’s services need to apply to the Family Court to start care proceedings.
It is positive to hear that the manager does not feel that they need to seek legal advice at present. This means that the social worker will be expected to continue carrying out child protection enquiries to better understand the situation. The social worker should:
Gather information about your son and your family
Assess your family’s situation
Decide whether they think your son is suffering significant harm
Decide whether they think your son is likely to suffer significant harm
Decide whether they should take any action to keep your son safe and promote his welfare.
A strategy discussion will have taken place recently, which is the meeting at which it was decided that a child protection investigation was necessary. Within 15 working days of this discussion an initial child protection conference will be held. You will be invited to this and I strongly advise that you do attend. You will have the opportunity to explain your views about the situation. At this conference an independent chairperson will make the decision about whether your son should become subject to a child protection plan. We have some useful advice HERE about the initial child protection conference, including THIS VIDEO which clearly explains how the process works and what to expect.
We also have information HERE about children’s services involvement when there are concerns about domestic abuse. I am sorry to hear that you were a victim of domestic abuse for 3 years and I hope that you have received some support regarding this. We have some information about organisations that can help victims of domestic abuse (whether it is happening now or in the past) HERE.
Ultimately, as a child protection investigation is being carried out, it is important that you work in partnership with children’s services (and it sounds like you are already doing this by allowing the social worker into your house and being in communication with them). We have a guide to working with a social worker which has some top tips for getting the best out of working with a social worker. You can find this HERE. Working in partnership with children’s services is the best way that you can show that your child is safe and well-cared for.
Please do feel free to contact us again. You can repost on this forum or send us an advice enquiry form.
Our Advice Service also offers:
• Easy to follow online information. Features include an A-Z, FAQs, films, ‘top tips’ and legal advice sheets;
• A webchat service where you can message an adviser online, who will help you find information and advice to support you.
• A free telephone advice line open Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 3pm (excluding Bank Holidays) on 0808 801 0366.
I hope this is helpful,
Best wishes,
Suzie
Welcome to the parents’ forum and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie and I am the online adviser for Family Rights Group. I will be responding to your posts today. I hope that the following advice and information is helpful to you. You can click on the links in my post to take you to more advice and information on our website.
You have explained that children’s services are carrying out section 47 enquiries. This is also known as a child protection investigation. When children’s services have information which suggests that a child might be at risk of significant harm they have a legal duty to carry out these enquiries. In your case, it seems that the information children’s services have been given about your partner, has led them to be concerned that your son might be at risk of harm.
We have information on our website HERE about child protection investigations. It might be helpful for you to read through it so that you understand how the process works, what your rights are, and how children’s service should work with you.
You have explained that the social worker asked you to sign a document to agree that your partner does not live with you, does not see your child unless in public, and that you agree to the children’s services assessment being carried out. This document is sometimes known as a ’written agreement’ and, as you are aware, these are not legally binding. You have explained that you decided not to sign this document and that although the social worker initially said that they would be seeking legal advice about this, their manager has decided that this is not necessary at the moment.
I think it is important here to explain that when a social worker or manager says that they will ‘seek legal advice’ this means that they will be taking advice from the legal team who work for children’s services. The legal team will advise whether they feel that the threshold has been met for a higher level of intervention. This would be to consider whether children’s services need to apply to the Family Court to start care proceedings.
It is positive to hear that the manager does not feel that they need to seek legal advice at present. This means that the social worker will be expected to continue carrying out child protection enquiries to better understand the situation. The social worker should:
Gather information about your son and your family
Assess your family’s situation
Decide whether they think your son is suffering significant harm
Decide whether they think your son is likely to suffer significant harm
Decide whether they should take any action to keep your son safe and promote his welfare.
A strategy discussion will have taken place recently, which is the meeting at which it was decided that a child protection investigation was necessary. Within 15 working days of this discussion an initial child protection conference will be held. You will be invited to this and I strongly advise that you do attend. You will have the opportunity to explain your views about the situation. At this conference an independent chairperson will make the decision about whether your son should become subject to a child protection plan. We have some useful advice HERE about the initial child protection conference, including THIS VIDEO which clearly explains how the process works and what to expect.
We also have information HERE about children’s services involvement when there are concerns about domestic abuse. I am sorry to hear that you were a victim of domestic abuse for 3 years and I hope that you have received some support regarding this. We have some information about organisations that can help victims of domestic abuse (whether it is happening now or in the past) HERE.
Ultimately, as a child protection investigation is being carried out, it is important that you work in partnership with children’s services (and it sounds like you are already doing this by allowing the social worker into your house and being in communication with them). We have a guide to working with a social worker which has some top tips for getting the best out of working with a social worker. You can find this HERE. Working in partnership with children’s services is the best way that you can show that your child is safe and well-cared for.
Please do feel free to contact us again. You can repost on this forum or send us an advice enquiry form.
Our Advice Service also offers:
• Easy to follow online information. Features include an A-Z, FAQs, films, ‘top tips’ and legal advice sheets;
• A webchat service where you can message an adviser online, who will help you find information and advice to support you.
• A free telephone advice line open Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 3pm (excluding Bank Holidays) on 0808 801 0366.
I hope this is helpful,
Best wishes,
Suzie
Do you have 3 minutes to complete our evaluation form ? We would value your feedback on the parents’ forum.
Re: First time and worried!
Thank you so much for your response! I will 100% let them into my house and work with them, I just found it unfair to try and put him homeless over allegations and I’m glad I didn’t sign it under pressure of ‘legal advice’ 
-
Suzie, FRG Adviser
- Posts: 4823
- Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:57 pm
Re: First time and worried!
Dear Mummyofx1,
I am glad that you found the replies and information helpful and reassuring. Thanks for coming back to the forum to let us know that.
Best wishes,
Suzie
I am glad that you found the replies and information helpful and reassuring. Thanks for coming back to the forum to let us know that.
Best wishes,
Suzie
Do you have 3 minutes to complete our evaluation form ? We would value your feedback on the parents’ forum.
-
Suzie, FRG Adviser
- Posts: 4823
- Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:57 pm
Re: First time and worried!
Dear Mummyofx1,
I am glad that you found the replies and information helpful and reassuring. Thanks for coming back to the forum to let us know that.
Best wishes,
Suzie
I am glad that you found the replies and information helpful and reassuring. Thanks for coming back to the forum to let us know that.
Best wishes,
Suzie
Do you have 3 minutes to complete our evaluation form ? We would value your feedback on the parents’ forum.
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