Child subject to SGO

Girl98
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:30 am

Child subject to SGO

Post by Girl98 » Wed Oct 28, 2020 1:20 pm

Hi everyone I need your advice..

Me and partner got to together when we were 14 and we had a history of DV.
we broke up and got back together when we’re 18 and everything was fine and then I fell pregnant and he started using cocaine, I wasn’t aware of this throughout my pregnancy until the end when he got drug tested and came back as a high cocaine user. Throughout the pregnancy there was a lot of DV calls made to the police and social services got involved.
The social worker from the beginning was horrible, I understand my child safety was in their best interest but the way handled things were really bad.
I gave birth to my child last 2017 and I was sent off to a mother baby unit an hour away from home and it went very well and we won the court case to live together when the 6 weeks was over. 2 weeks in there was a massive fight where I called my sister to come and get me as it was really bad and I went back to hers and my mum called the police which I hated for her at the time but obviously now I appreciate her for doing it to and extent.
This made my partner wanted for ABH and he went on the ‘run’ didn’t hand himself in for a year and so that meant him not involving with social worker and missed out on the risk assessment and contact with our child.
They started court proceedings and they asked me to choose and obviously I chose our child but my action spoke louder then words and they said I wasn’t in the right mentally state to look after her and they asked me who I want to look after her and I chose my sister and her boyfriend. They agreed and have been amazing ever since we had our ups and downs at the beginning as I envied her for being up my child but I finally accepted I couldn’t ask for a better gift in life.

Social worker closed the case

So come 2018 he finally got off cocaine and sorted himself out and got a job and handed himself in. All charges were dropped.
2019 was a year on focusing on getting himself better which sounds bad I know but he said he couldn’t focus on our child if he wasn’t 100% on himself.

I’ve seen our child all the way through and we have a really good bond and she knows I’m her mum.

Dad has now made contact with social workers after completing a 26 week domestic violence class and come off cocaine. He has bettered himself really well.
He made contact with social workers and they agreed to a risk assessment and he is now half way through and they said it’s going really well and he is a complete different person back to 2017-2018.

The last DV Incident was back in July 2018 which police were called to and he went to court and they gave him a 12 month thing where he couldn’t get in trouble with the police and it worked.

So 2 years free of DV and we decided to move in together which I was very wary as there was no DV as we didn’t live together and now we have been living together a year and things have really changed and I would be happy and feel safe to bring our child back into the flat.

What I’m trying to get at is do you think we have a good chance to revoke the sgo?

The findings were-
• Dad on cocaine and was a high cocaine user
• long history on DV
• my mentally state was not in a good way to provide a safe environment
• I was finically depending on my dad
• I was really affected by what had happened and my emotions were all over the place.
• no where to live ( had to hand my flat back to prove I would put her first)

Since then we both have a well paid full time job and been on employment for over two years.
Dad is off cocaine and would pass a drug test
I am on sertialine to do deal with my anxiety which was called through the trauma
I see a DV worker every week and he has a support worker for abusers.
No longer finically dependent on my dad
Have a lovely safe home
Dad has completed a DV course
I completed the freedom programme.


Also would really want another child but I’m scared that all this will happen again never get a chance of getting her back and also having another baby taken.

Please be honest and don’t sugarcoat what you think.
Do you think we have significant change?
Also the social worker said she will see how she can help on this.

Thank you and please don’t judge me

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Fri Nov 13, 2020 6:43 pm

Dear Girl98,

Welcome to the Parents’ Discussion Board.

From what you write, your child was born in 2017, and is currently cared for by your sister and her partner under a Special Guardianship Order (SGO).

Since the order was made, you have maintained contact with your child and you have recently resumed your relationship with the child’s father, and you have now been living together for a year. You said that your partner has made significant changes, that there has been no domestic violence in the relationship and that he is no longer using cocaine. It sounds as though you and your partner have made some really positive progress in your lives and have worked with a number of agencies to receive help. This is really encouraging.

To make an application to discharge a SGO, you would have to obtain permission from the court. The court will consider whether significant changes have been made from the time the order was made, and you would need to provide evidence to support this. The court will also consider whether it is in your daughter’s best interests to discharge the SGO. For more information on what SGOs mean for birth parents we have an advice sheet, you can find it here. It is clear you and your partner have made changes to your lives, however, I am unable to say whether the Court will find these sufficient to discharge the SGO or whether it would be in your daughter’s best interests, given that she is likely to be settled with your sister and her partner after 3 years.

It is positive to hear that your partner is currently being risk-assessed by a social worker, and that so far, this is going really well. Has your partner had any contact with your son recently, and if so, has this been supervised or unsupervised? I think it may helpful to wait for the risk assessment to conclude and to consider the social worker’s recommendations around contact, if this is not already taking place. You and your partner may be able to work with your sister to build up contact with your child over time, and should this go well, she may be able to jointly support your application to discharge the SGO in the future.

You mention that you would like to have another child but are worried that any future children may be removed by children’s services. Due to previous concerns regarding your first child, should you become pregnant, children’s services may want to carry out a pre-birth assessment. You can find more information about what an assessment may entail here. This assessment should take account of your individual circumstances and needs as they currently stand, and yours and partner’s capacity to care for a baby right now. This does not necessarily mean children’s services will take action to remove any future children you have – they may want to offer support on a child in need plan, or if their concerns are more significant, on a child protection plan. If you would like more information about the ways children services may be involved, you can take a look at our advice sheets on family support and on child protection procedures.

If you would like to talk this through with someone, you can ring our free advice helpline to speak to one of our advisers on 0808 801 0366. We are open Monday to Friday from 09:30am to 3:00pm.

I hope you have found this helpful.

Best Wishes,
Suzie

Girl98
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:30 am

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Girl98 » Mon Oct 18, 2021 2:33 pm

Hi, me again!

So risk assessment indicated no risk and went to supervised contact by sister for a couple of weeks ( get their bond ) and then went onto full day contact once a week unsupervised (6 hours once a week) in April 2021


Family contact unsupervised in may 2021

Over night stays since august 2021


We have since applied for leave to apply of sgo to be revoke been given court date for 24th November…



Do you think this will go well?

Girl98
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:30 am

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Girl98 » Mon Oct 18, 2021 2:35 pm

Overnight stays happen Friday - Saturday every week..

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 3255
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Fri Oct 22, 2021 5:04 pm

Dear Girl98

Welcome back to the Parents’ Forum and thank you for your updating post.

I can see that you and your partner have worked very hard and consistently to address the difficulties you both experienced which led to the SGO being made for your child. You have shown a strong commitment to making and maintaining the changes needed. This has been reflected in the outcome of the risk assessment, the increase in contact and that it no longer needs to be supervised. Well done.

You have now taken the step of asking the court’s permission to apply to revoke the SGO. Is your sister (Special Guardian) supporting your application?

Unfortunately , we cannot predict the outcome but the progress and determination you have shown will be acknowledged. The court will give permission if it is satisfied that:

• There has been a “significant change of circumstances” since the special guardianship order was made and
• There is a chance that the application to end the order will be successful, and it is in the child’s best interests for the application to be heard.

As your child may be quite settled with your sister, the impact on her of a move home would have to be weighed up carefully. If you are all working well together (which it seems) this is a good advantage as she will benefit from a close supportive family around her.

I hope that the best decision is made for your child and that you continue to do so well.

Perhaps you will update us about how your application goes? It is really helpful for
parents struggling with similar situations to hear how others have moved forward.

With best wishes

Suzie

Girl98
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:30 am

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Girl98 » Wed Nov 17, 2021 8:49 pm

Hello again..

My sister statement was very bias..

She posted a lot of historical factors which was a negative but the truth so we can’t moan.

She said at the end even though over night stay are going very well she would like a bit more time to prove she is still our priority..

She wants a full parenting assessment done and either outcome she will support us in the future…

Court is next Wednesdays I’m so scared!!

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 3255
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Tue Nov 23, 2021 1:10 pm

Dear Girl98,

Thankyou for your update. I see that you have the court hearing tomorrow; I hope that you get a good outcome for your child.

Please do keep us updated and post again if you have any further questions as things develop. You can also call our helpline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 09:30 - 15:00) if you would like to speak with an adviser.

Best wishes,
Suzie

Girl98
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:30 am

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Girl98 » Wed Nov 24, 2021 6:03 pm

So sister didn’t support us..

Today outcome is..

New court date is March 22..

IT IS ORDERED THAT:

1. Pursuant to Section 7 of The Children Act 1989 City Council must file a report by 4 p.m. on 16th February 2022 dealing with the following issues:


i) The ability of the parents to care for A.


ii) Whether the circumstances of the parents have changed since the making of the special guardianship order and, if so, how.


iii) Whether, in the opinion of the Local Authority, the special guardianship order should be discharged.

What do you think?

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 3255
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Thu Nov 25, 2021 4:14 pm

Dear Girl98,

The court has asked the social worker to complete a section 7 report - this is a welfare report that will address the questions you have listed, and will assist the court in making its decision to discharge the special guardianship order or not.

I suggest that you make contact with the social worker to discuss what you can expect from the section 7 report and the timescales for this. It is likely that the social worker will meet with you over a number of sessions in order to assess your ability to care for your child and to assess your change in circumstances.

I wish you all the best.

Best wishes,

Suzie.

Girl98
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:30 am

Re: Child subject to SGO

Post by Girl98 » Thu Nov 25, 2021 4:20 pm

Hello..

So we don’t have a social worker and we have to wait for one to be assigned to us yet..

What shall we expect?

What are the topics?

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