Relocation

[DA573]

Dear Team,
I am new to this forum and I was wondering if you would be able to advise please?
I split from my daughter’s dad when she was 1 year old. We were engaged at the time and I left due to domestic abuse which was getting worse. Social services were involved as police was called after last incident. They were very helpful and helped me to get back on my feet. Situation got worse and after last threats I ended obtaining emergency non-molestion order and prohibited steps order against him and I moved to confidential address where we still live now. That was a time when I realised that our daughter will have a better future back at my home town with my family and grandparents and their support.
As I was on a maternity leave I was given Legal aid solicitor and barrister to represent me during court proceedings. I told them that I wish to relocate to my home country (which is in Europe) but was told to wait until Fact Finding Hearing which was 8 months later as it will jeopardise my case and judge would think that I plan it all along...
I submitted my Relocation application in December last year (after FFH), worked hard on my relocation statement, found a nursery, job and made plan for us and a little one to live back home. I genuinely believe that our daughter will have better future back home surrounded by family, having family support around and financially as well. I am not against father having contact and I do believe it’s possible if we live abroad. I have made three pages proposal how contact would work which was totally disregarded by father.
Father started supervised contact in April this year which has now progressed into unsupervised. And to my big surprise I was told by the judge that my application for relocation will have to be postponed till next year. This fact was purely based on Cafcass report and their claims that father needs to build relationship with his daughter and our relationship to co-parent is not tested in UK, let along in another country. Father stopped contact with his daughter himself when court proceedings started for over a year. There was no messages, cards, presentS or any form of contact via my solicitor...
I am not living my life, but I just feel like I am surviving being away from our family and is not the future I imagined for our daughter. We have no support here, been through counselling and DV support group to help me deal with an impact of being in DV relationship. I left UK after few years ago to be with my family (before we had daughter) but came back to be with my ex partner with a promise of getting married and having a family which turned up to be a nightmare. Now it’s been two years since we split, our daughter is 3 now and I have to wait another months
for another court date.
Problem is that my ex partner is not communicating with me, he ignores most of emails I sent him about our daughter. If he occasionally responds he is very snappy and keeps bringing past and our break up into it every single time.
I am worried sick that I do every little thing court asked me to do and when it comes to another conversation with Cafcass in few months time they will turn around and tell me that we need to stay in UK because he hasn’t build relationship with daughter or that I am taking away his daughter and she has established relationship with her dad. Despite wanted to move for over two years now! Cafcass report is otherwise positive when it comes to our daughter living with me and they understand reasons behind my application.
Court issued prohibited steps order on my ex partner and almost a year down the line on me as well. Despite travelling to my home city on many occasions before and returning every single time. I have not been able to leave UK without court permission (which was twice in two years time) to see our family back home.
I am told that court can ask me to let him know our daughter’s GP and nursery address which obviously is few minutes walk from where we live. I moved to another borough to be safe when assaults happened and I can’t believe that have right to ask me this. Can they? I do send him nursery reports and GP reports and as he lives over an hour away all handovers now are taking place centrally so he doesn’t really need to know the addresses.
I am devastated and not sure what my chances are or what else I shall do to make my case stronger when it comes to court hearing in few months time. Any advice would be much appreciated.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear DA573

Welcome to the parents’ discussion board and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie and I am FRG’s online adviser. I am sorry that there has been a delay in responding to you.

I am sorry to hear of the domestic abuse you and your daughter experienced and glad that you are now safe.

I can see that you would dearly love to return to your home country with your daughter and that this is a matter which is being considered by the family court as part of private law proceedings. At present there is a Section 8 prohibited steps order preventing either you or your daughter’s father from taking her abroad until this issue is decided upon.

You are also worried that the court may ask that your daughter’s nursery and GP details are shared with her father, although you moved to a confidential address because of the domestic violence. The court should be well-informed about domestic violence and would need to carefully consider if/what information about a child should be shared in this situation.

Unfortunately, your queries fall outside our remit which is to provide advice to families involved with children’s services. Although you mention their involvement at one stage it does not sound as if they are still involved. If you no longer have a solicitor, there are a number of organisations who can provide private law advice; Child Law Advice – they have some information here on travel and relocation but I would recommend that you call them on 0300 330 5480 to discuss your case in more detail. You could also speak to Rights of Women who can provide specialist advice on family law and domestic violence. Their national helpline number is 020 7251 6577. Please check their website for their opening times which are mainly in the evening.

In addition,
Support through court may be able to help you with practical and emotional help if you are facing court alone. In some cases, We are Advocate can help with representation.

I hope this is helpful and that you are able to get the legal advice you need.

Best wishes

Suzie

[DA573]

Many thanks for your response and suggestions.
Much appreciated