I need advice & help

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abusedparent
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jul 14, 2021 7:58 pm

I need advice & help

Post by abusedparent » Thu Jul 15, 2021 5:23 pm

This potentially could be long so forgive me if I appear to curtail certain information. Everything I have stated in this post we have evidence for, either email correspondence, audio recording or paperwork. I am the father.

My 17 year old daughter, lets call her “E” became infatuated with this person online. When we noticed we told her this behaviour is not appropriate and we took the phone away. We didn't know at the time but she maintained contact via school and the council library.

She became depressed and attempted suicide a few times (it turned out later on it was on the instruction of her online groomer - and we have evidence for this).

Child services got involved and said they would help. Great.

The first issue was at the ICPC where we were instructed to give the phone back to "E" as we were performing emotional abuse and to call the paedophile her ‘boyfriend’.

Our three children were placed on plans because the autistic one had also started having suicidal ideation (At the time we didn’t know but the paedophile was instructing “E” to tell “Z” to kill herself and she was worthless – before all this they were very close).

After the phone was returned and my daughter "Z" was voluntarily placed in a facility. She was later discharged as the suicidal ideation didn't stop and she tried killing herself in there. She too had her phone. We had her discharged because we found out that autistic people cannot be in a mental health facility without the commissioners approval and only then, for a maximum of 2 weeks.

Later “E” went on to take naked pictures of herself as well as my 9 year old (at the time) whom we will call “S” and "Z" who was 15 an diagnosed autistic.

It was disclosed in court that the paedophile blackmailed “E” to take erotic pictures, lick toilet seats, threaten family members with a knife (the agenda I believe was to separate her from us) which involved the police and to do ‘fake’ suicide attempts (saying she had drank bleach when she didn’t).

When “E” split from the paedophile (due to our actions of persistent encouragement and engagement) the social worker insisted she go dating “to get better”. We were afraid to challenge this because of the allegation of abuse towards us. On date 3 with this boy from school, she was raped and we went to the Police who did investigate, found this young man had done this at least 3 times before but it was NFA’d believe it or not. This took some time to sort of course. Because we were ‘liars’ about the paedophile no record was made of “E”’s statement, no video was made and it was brushed off. The local authority began hiding this information.

Because “E” felt so guilty on the hell she put us through with the paedophile she told the social worker and not us about the rape and she did nothing, not even seek appropriate medical attention. No pregnancy test, STD test, therapy NOTHING. When we were told some time later by “E”, we went to the doctors with her.

A year passed on the plan and no-where was the paedophile mentioned, we were simply labelled disruptive. In the end in a psychological assessment the psychologist suggested getting legal help and go to court. So we thought, great idea, we will disengage.
Court took 13 weeks to happen and we went to court a total of 5 times before it became apparent there was an issue as the trial hadn't moved past discovery and disclosure. The case was closed without us even giving evidence and a ‘family support order’ was agreed upon with a promise to investigate thoroughly the allegations.

It turned out in the paperwork they knew about the paedophile and did nothing. The social worker had directed the police that we were liars and abusers so they never helped and “E” disclosed to her advocate all the things the paedophile made her do. This also explained why we were actually told off and threatened by the Police for "wasting their time" and "listen to the social worker or you will lose your child.."

Looking at the paperwork it turned out that the reports against us were fabricated, some of the people we have managed to contact have denied speaking to the social worker and never wrote a report for court. Worse, have never met us.

A complaint was made, but it was said to be “too numerous” and we have been ghosted.

This all ended in 2019.

All our complaints have been ignored, the IGO has said it is too late to submit a complaint and social work England are at the ‘triage’ stage.

What more can I do?

“E” is still suicidal and on medication and in her latest suicide attempt child services were informed but this time had “no concerns” about “S” as she is the only minor. They closed the case.

How do I get this to be investigated properly? We have evidence for everything I have said.

I will be honest and say I myself feel almost suicidal over all of this, I can’t sleep and the things that go through my mind about these abusers no decent person should think.

Any advice is appreciated. Evidence can be supplied on request as can further information.

As11
Posts: 15
Joined: Tue Jul 20, 2021 9:14 am

Re: I need advice & help

Post by As11 » Fri Jul 23, 2021 9:17 pm

I’m not sure if I am allowed to advise this but you could try a group called child law, or try the NSSPPC. Or another group called women’s rights. Some of these organisations could help you with this as your daughter is still a “child” I think the NSSPCC would be best there is a phone line for parents worried about a child/ children they have a safeguarding team you could speak to who would be the best people to advise you, I’m not sure if there is a safe guarding issue or but it can’t hurt to ask them what they think as your daughter needs to help to process what she has been through they might have some suggestions and support for your family. It’s the only organisation that I can think of that could advise in terms of the law and the support your daughter will need. They will be able to listen to everything you have said in your post and give you the information about what your options are if you like. I hope this helps google the NSPPC and find the section for parents and care givers. They should help.

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