Worried mum…sons dad arrested and now only allowed supervised visits with son.

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Roo83
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Sep 23, 2021 4:52 pm

Worried mum…sons dad arrested and now only allowed supervised visits with son.

Post by Roo83 » Fri Sep 24, 2021 7:18 pm

Not sure where to begin as new to to this site.My sons dad was arrested last week and is under investigation for sending inappropriate messages to a minor-to his partners son aged 10.He says it was just joke messages and I believe him.But none the less whilst he is under investigation my son isn’t allowed unsupervised visits with his dad.We aren’t together but I want him to be able to spend time with my son.Social services have recommend he isn’t alone with son.
Just wondered if anyone had been in a similar situation.
I don’t know what to expect or what happens next.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Could he end up on the sex offenders register?And what would this mean for visits?How long can the police investigate this for?They still have his phone which they took when they arrested him.I just want answers.
Child services are saying they want my son who’s 11 to have a meeting to do has what is right and wrong as also there was racist comments sent from his dad to his step son.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 4210
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Worried mum…sons dad arrested and now only allowed supervised visits with son.

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Sep 27, 2021 4:14 pm

Dear Roo83,

Welcome to the Parents Forum. My name is Suzie, Frg’s online adviser.

I can see that you are shocked by what has happened and dad’s arrest for sending inappropriate messages to his stepson who is aged 10. He has also made racist comments to his stepson which has also caused concern. The police have taken his phone to be forensically examined which can take a while. If dad is found guilty, then he could end up on the sex offender register. Please see Unlock for more information about sex offences and how they are dealt with by the courts. Because dad has sent racist comments to his stepson, children services will be very concerned that dad has been emotionally abusive which can affect his stepson’s self-esteem, and emotional and mental health.

It sounds like children services are assessing you and your son to see whether you need any support to protect your son from dads possible risk to him. Even though no one knows whether dad is a danger to your son, children services cannot take any risks so that is why they want you to supervise dads contact with your son. Do you have anyone (family or friend) or yourself who can supervise the contact?

They also want to interview your son to find out whether he knows the difference between right and wrong. Is the interview taking place at your home or in school? It is normal that they will want to speak to your son alone -so without you being present. At school you could ask for a teacher or someone he knows well to sit in on the interview.

Here is information about social workers speaking to children.
Here is information about assessments.
Here is information about sexual abuse and how children services assess .

I hope this advice helps but if you have any questions, please post on the forum again or call our free and confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366 for further advice.
Best wishes,
Suzie

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