Challenging social worker decisions

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed May 29, 2019 2:06 pm

Dear Freddie,

I suggest you ask the social worker to set out in writing why she has come to this decision given the previous social worker was advocating that he now have direct contact with your children. As you say, it is a change of plan.

When you receive a written response, you could then challenge the decision by children services complaints procedure. Or seek legal advice from a solicitor who specialises in child care law. They could advise whether children services could successfully pursue a case to remove your children from you.

I know your partner committed sexual offences against women. Is the social worker also worried that he may be sexually violent or domestically violent to you? Not just your children. If so, she may be worried that your children will then suffer the trauma of witnessing you being hurt.

If so, have you been offered support about the effects of domestic violence and sexual violence effects on children?

Children services must believe your children are old enough to know about the crimes your partner committed. If your children are told about his risks, then this may help them be self-protective when he is around. It also opens the dialogue for them to seek protection from you, if they feel in danger. Speak to the Lucy Faithfull Foundation.

What does dad think? Is he worried that your partner is risky to your children? If he thought you were not protecting them, he has the option of seeking a court order for the children live with him.

I hope this helps. If you have any questions, please post again.

Best wishes,
Suzie

PerfectlySafeDad
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by PerfectlySafeDad » Sun Jun 09, 2019 3:34 pm

"My children are only 8 and 10. The disclosure I made to them spoke nothing about his sexual offence. It focused on his mental health and an offence which he went to prison for and the gave he has no parental experience. In SS 's view that is their major concern. I personally know of dozens of couples where a new partner had no parental experience.

Dad has actually said that he feels my partner does not pose any risk whatsoever to my children. Then says he wants then nowhere near them. He has been telling them for over a year that they will never meet him, that anyone who goes to prison is evil and they should not be friends with people who have gone to prison. My ex is manipulative and had proven himself over the past year to be a rubbish parent, he let's them stay up ridiculously late, he has allowed them access to porn, he doesn't provide basic care poker feed then healthy meals yet SS still say they would support him if he went for custody"

It's obvious from that lot that the social services don't know what the hell they are doing and are totally incapable of untangling this case, and they are doing more harm than good by their human right-violating interference. As an organisation, they do not trust each other internally and act with cruelty plus incompetence together, which is the classic hallmark of tyrannies. When goalposts are shifted in dire ways such as this how can they possibly ever be trusted? The only solution in attempting to deal with Britain's social services is to evade coming to their attention at all and give out no information whatsoever about your very existence as far as you can possibly help it. They are extremely dangerous people, more dangerous than the vast majority of people they deal with in their so-called 'risk assessments'. They should be disbanded altogether. There's got to be a better solution to protect children than these jumped-up mediocrities.

Oldboy
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Oldboy » Fri Jun 14, 2019 3:34 pm

Freddie wrote:
Wed Jun 05, 2019 11:55 am


My children are only 8 and 10. The disclosure I made to them spoke nothing about his sexual offence. It focused on his mental health and an offence which he went to prison for and the gave he has no parental experience. In SS 's view that is their major concern. I personally know of dozens of couples where a new partner had no parental experience.

Dad has actually said that he feels my partner does not pose any risk whatsoever to my children. Then says he wants then nowhere near them. He has been telling them for over a year that they will never meet him, that anyone who goes to prison is evil and they should not be friends with people who have gone to prison. My ex is manipulative and had proven himself over the past year to be a rubbish parent, he let's them stay up ridiculously late, he has allowed them access to porn, he doesn't provide basic care poker feed then healthy meals yet SS still say they would support him if he went for custody.
See this concerns me here. Why are SS still in support of your ex regarding custody?

You also state your partner committed a sexual offence as in just one but then mention his history is against unknown women so he's a repeat offender? Apologies if it is a typo.

If he is in fact a serial offender I would guess a major concern for SS is that he might reoffend again as he has already shown that he can and I could hardly blame your ex for not wanting his children around your new partner sorry. But then if he is saying he believes your partner is no risk it all sounds like an absolute mess and like PerfectlySafeDad said it's no wonder SS can't untangle the case.

Runnermum16
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Runnermum16 » Wed Jun 19, 2019 8:24 am

I too find SS a real Pain in the....
They come accross as being very biased and always looking for the most easiest and obvious solution. Not considering the wants and needs of the children which should be their primary concern. My ex Is acting like an exemplary father at the moment. But hadn't been this way for 10 years. My kids are Only 10 and 11. My new partner is on the SOR so My ex is kicking off big style. The SS advised him To Keep the kids until I Leave my new Partner. My kids want to Come Home... Surely their needs matter??
I know leaving my new Partner is the easiest solution and some Would argue "why don't I just do that" but he is a good Man who Made a mistake. I believe in second chances and I believe that my new Partner will never reoffend.. The SS are saying I'm being groomed, which is an absolute joke. We Comply with all they have asked and cooperate fully. With all Assessments...

Runnermum16
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Runnermum16 » Tue Jun 25, 2019 9:27 am

The SS spoke to my new partner but never actually put anything in the report about the meeting. (probably because they couldn't find anything wrong with him) when I last attended court and told the judge about the meeting she asked for evidence. I explained that I obviously didn't have anything other than a txt message confirming the appointment on my partners phone. She then asked me why there was nothing in the report... Lol
My exs charm is slowly slipping. He had a crazy outburst in court as he didn't get his own way. Surely what the kids want is more important.
My kids visit me 3 times a week and look like they haven't had a wash. I make sure they bathe and clean up before going back to their dads. SS don't seem too fussed about this hygiene matter though.
They act like the super police and live by their own rules which I think they make up As they go along... Lol

Runnermum16
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Runnermum16 » Wed Jul 10, 2019 8:25 am

Hi Freddie,

Yes I do find that they twist things and make things up. It's as though they have already decided what they want to write but are just going through the motions with the visits and reporting.
My SW is forever cancelling on me. Saying there's a more urgent case to deal with. Well clearly if mine isn't urgent why all the fuss?? It's extremely frustrating tbh. I'm still fighting the battle In getting my new partner risk assessed.... They keep telling me he's super dangerous (which he really isn't) yet they are in no rush to risk assess him or even speak to him. My ex has caused all this hassle by keeping the kids away from me in the first instance. I do Wonder what he's trying to achieve tbh. He was very controlling and manipulative during our relationship and I can't help but think that this is yet another one of his ways of destroying my life. Surely if he cares for our kids that much he'd accept that the PSO preventing my new partner having any contact with the kids or visiting my home is more than adequate. And the kids should be allowed back to stay with me....

Apologies for my ramble. I'm just rather frustrated this morning....

PerfectlySafeDad
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by PerfectlySafeDad » Thu Jul 11, 2019 11:00 am

@ runnermum and Freddie...
They're an absolute disgrace, aren't they? Words fail me. I've poured so much vitriol over Britain's social services (I refuse to call them children's services, because this name change is part of the insidious process by which they think they have the highest moral ground and opens the floodgates for their zealotry, they're anything but protectors of children's welfare, yet the title gives them excuse not to care one jot about the pain they cause parents so long as, in their eyes, the children are being 'safeguarded' - ie subject to their strangulating judgements).. as I was saying, I've poured so such vitriol over them over recent years yet still I read stuff (as here) that makes me simply run out of words for what sheer women's genitalia they are.
"She is adamant that this decision can not be overturned and will just not accept that my partner could ever be anything but a significant risk. He has completed assessments and come out low risk but now she's saying that the assessment only covers kids and they well obviously turn into adults yet they say the girls can meet him when they are 18".
Comments on the above:
1) sheer arrogance 'decision cannot be overturned' just who the f do they think they are??
2) blinkered, demonizing, ignorant - unable to or unwilling to give anyone a chance.
3) complete f.ing idiots. So, he can't see the kids now because they are kids (yet he is assessed by higher professionals than they that he is not a risk to kids), and they're concerned about his risk to the kids when they turn into adults yet they've granted contcat when they turn 18?? (as if they could refuse when the kids are adults anyway, what nonsense is this??)
Just fight them over the alleged risk of contact now, and as for when the girls turn 18, simple. just tell SS to sod off, because they don't have a say in an adult's life. Who the hell do they think they are? Staggering. When is this tyranny going to be called out?
Hoe the hell can any advisers on this site defend these dangerous morons in the slightest any more?

Runnermum16
Posts: 42
Joined: Sat Mar 16, 2019 2:33 pm

Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Runnermum16 » Tue Jul 16, 2019 4:59 pm

Hey perfectlysafedad and Freddie....

It is an absolute outrage how the SW can go about their business sayig they are safeguarding the children and putting their needs first. Mine have asked for things to go back to normal so many times yet the SW are just putting it on my head saying that it's all My fault. I have a PSO on my preventing my new partner having any contact with my kids or visiting the family home, my ex is saying this is still not enough (have I mentioned he was controlling during my relationship and I am currently in the process of counselling for this as advised by my solicitor) but the SW has almost admitted today that she feels that the PSO is more than sufficient. I can't hell but feel my ex is trying to Control who I have in my life.....

I resent calling them children's services as they think they are the super police and have super power.... The only thing they do is cause disruption and upset...

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jul 17, 2019 1:23 pm

Runnermum16 wrote:
Wed Jun 19, 2019 8:24 am
I too find SS a real Pain in the....
They come accross as being very biased and always looking for the most easiest and obvious solution. Not considering the wants and needs of the children which should be their primary concern. My ex Is acting like an exemplary father at the moment. But hadn't been this way for 10 years. My kids are Only 10 and 11. My new partner is on the SOR so My ex is kicking off big style. The SS advised him To Keep the kids until I Leave my new Partner. My kids want to Come Home... Surely their needs matter??
I know leaving my new Partner is the easiest solution and some Would argue "why don't I just do that" but he is a good Man who Made a mistake. I believe in second chances and I believe that my new Partner will never reoffend.. The SS are saying I'm being groomed, which is an absolute joke. We Comply with all they have asked and cooperate fully. With all Assessments...
Dear Runnermum16

You are currently in private law proceedings relating to your children which means that the court will be make a final decision regarding where your children should live.

Children's services will be concerned about your new partner's background and how this might impact on your children from a safeguarding point of view. Whilst I understand that you believe your partner is a reformed character and unlikely to re-offend, children's services usually take the opposite view since there are no guarantees. Part of the concern about your ability to safeguard is that you are so sure about your ex partner that you may not be protective enough of your children.

Perhaps you might find it helpful to speak with the Lucy Faithfull Foundation's Parents Protect on 0808 1000 900 which might help you to better understand the concerns that children's services have and help you so you are able to show children's services that you are taking on board their concerns and have the ability to protect your children.

Whilst no one likes to have children's services involvement they do have a legal duty to ensure that children are safeguarded and should work with parents or others to ensure that children are safe. The important thing is to understand their concerns and are willing to work cooperatively.

Now the matter is before the court and your children are with their father are children's services still working with you? Are they assessing you, your new partner or are they awaiting the outcome of the court hearing. The most important thing for you is to try your best to work with children's services to secure the best outcome for you and your family.

Best wishes

Suzie

Runnermum16
Posts: 42
Joined: Sat Mar 16, 2019 2:33 pm

Re: Challenging social worker decisions

Post by Runnermum16 » Wed Jul 24, 2019 9:28 am

Hi suzie, many thanks for your response. The social Worker I have seems to be working against me rather than with me. It is the first time I have ever had to deal with a situation like this so I may come accross to her as being a bit stupid.... When they ask me about what risks I feel my partner poses, well tbh I don't know how to answer the question. I guess I was assuming they would educate me a bit, support me in supporting my children and provide information on how to do so. Instead I've just been hit with negativity and biased opinions, when all I ever wanted was to be open and honest about my relationship and ensure that the relevant people were informed to avoid and future issues for my children and myself.

As they are still trying to carry out the risk assessment due to their incompetence in reading the court document properly and now want everyone to jump through hoops so they can reach their deadline they are trying to imply that we are now not cooperating as we can't get time off work....

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