Communication

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Nannygems
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 30, 2017 1:17 pm

Communication

Post by Nannygems » Mon Sep 30, 2019 4:23 pm

Hi. This concerns one of my 4 grandsons that are in care. He's the youngest child. 2 eldest children and the parents are profoundly deaf and communicate using BSL. Mother and eldest child are vocal also. Before going into care the youngest then just 5yrs old did communicate with brothers and parents , using basic sign language. He was from a toddler taught the basics by his mother and was doing well. It was important for him to learn because dad and 2nd child were fully BSL.
It has been over 2 years now of being in care and we are stiil fighting for their return. Our problem now is that since being in care he has not kept up with using and learning BSL. This is extremely important as at contact with parents and brothers he no longer communicates. We have wrote to social work complaints regards this and are disgusted with their reply.
They say they cannot force him to learn sign language if he doesn't want to
This is so wrong as he needs to communicate with his family and if he was still home would be doing it. This is not the first issue we have had with social services.
Do you have any advice.

Nannygems
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 30, 2017 1:17 pm

Re: Communication

Post by Nannygems » Thu Oct 10, 2019 1:32 pm

Had no reply?

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Robin D
Posts: 1985
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 1:58 pm

Re: Communication

Post by Robin D » Thu Oct 10, 2019 7:57 pm

Hi Nannygems.

I know the team at FRG are very busy. I'm a 'retired' family and friends carer who have noted no-one has replied so I will try to assist.

There is a difficulty that at seven, the child will be beginning to exert their own will. However, social services should be promoting contact with the family and it's difficult to see how that can be achieved if those caring for your grandson are not prepared to persuade or gently push your grandson into maintaining the BSL.

You have not said why the children were taken into care, hopefully not because the rest of the family are deaf! If it was, BDA or similar may be better placed to advise and assist as I'm guessing they might view it as disability discrimination.

You also do not say what sort of order is in place, or if you are party to proceedings. Ideally, the advisers at FRG need to understand this before they are able to provide the best advice. However, given the sensitivity of the matter, rather than posting the details here, you might want to call the helpline 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday 9.30am to 3pm). Calls to that number are not logged and the service is entirely confidential.

Hopefully this is of some assistance.

Best wishes .... Robin
Former F&F carer, foster carer, adopter and respite carer for umpteen children. Now retired and when with kids, making sure they 'go home' at the end of the day.

Nannygems
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 30, 2017 1:17 pm

Re: Communication

Post by Nannygems » Sun Oct 13, 2019 9:40 am

Thanks Robin
They're in care as per the at risk of "future harm". We disagree as dad and 3 boys have complex health issues. Mum and dad both deaf, 2 oldest deaf, 2 youngest hearing (codas). We are fighting back as no assessments done until just prior and during proceedings. Father confirmed Wardenburghs Syndrome which is a "rare disease" of which there is 4 types, its hereditary. Found recently paternal side had this which caused mental health problems with some, learning disability, deafness etc in dads family. As no living relatives now and he was an only child we've had to dig up facts.
Dad also awaiting asd results. Eldest child paranoid schizophrenia, 2nd child asd and learning difficulties 3rd child Dyspraxia. These all confirmed during and after proceedings. Parents blamed for children's behaviour not the underlying causes. Its a full care order till 18. We reject that on many grounds and are seeking discharge of the care order. Its a complicated case but ss records to court had many inaccuracies but nobody questioned it (solicitors ).
I have gained much knowledge in the almost 3 three years since in care. Have studied much about the condition of Wardenburghs and what it causes. The behaviours of the children where a direct cause of this but ss refused to accept that. Although they did get support it was never appropriate to the cause.
Back to sign language its important at contact that the child is able to communicate with his parents and older siblings.

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Robin D
Posts: 1985
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 1:58 pm

Re: Communication

Post by Robin D » Sun Oct 13, 2019 10:06 am

Hi again.

Thanks for the further information. I note you are a seeking a discharge of the care order. Is that application from you, or the parents? Is that now back in court, and are you a party to proceedings? If not, in my opinion, you need to be else you have no voice. The BSL difference of opinion would best form part of that application in the SS have not made reasonable effort to ensure that family contact takes place in meaningful manner for the child. I don't know if you have seen or read [url]https://www.disabilityrightsuk.org/news ... -warns[url], but it highlighted the fact that support for disabled parents to allow them to keep their is awful.

The SW should also by now have a permanence plan for the child. Have you seen or been told about this?

One key point for getting decisions overturned by the court is the existence of a plan by the family to absolutely ensure the safety of the child? Does such a plan exist? Is you plan that the child lives with you?

Good luck ... sounds like you are going to need it?
Former F&F carer, foster carer, adopter and respite carer for umpteen children. Now retired and when with kids, making sure they 'go home' at the end of the day.

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