Where do I stand? Complicated situation.
Posted: Thu May 06, 2021 6:56 pm
I will try my best to keep this a brief as possible. My daughter fell pregnant but found out she would be bringing her child up as a single parent. My daughter was living at home still with myself and my partner, we said we would help to bring up the child. We did this for 6 years, from helping with night feeds most Dr and hospital appointments etc and parents consultations when my grandchild started nursery. We supported my daughter when she wanted find a part time job, by looking after my grandchild. My daughter then moved into her own property with her child, but myself and my partner still continued to help while my daughter worked. At the end of January this year my grandchild came to us for a pre arranged sleepover as they had done on many occasions, that evening we had a call from social services telling us that my daughter had been detained under the mental health act and could we look after my grandchild, when my daughter was discharged we had another phone call asking if we could continue to look after my grandchild. This basically was the case up until 22nd April when having sent my grandchild off to school that morning and made promises as to what we were going to do that afternoon, we had a call from social services asking if they could pop to see us, which we thought was going to be just another usual visit. Within a few minutes of them turning up we were told that my grandchild was Not going to come back to us but that they were being placed with Foster Carers. We then had to pack some bags of things for the child, I asked could we have some kind of contact with my grandchild that evening so we could at least explain to them that this was not out wish that they couldn't come back to us, verbally we were told yes they would arrange something but then they phoned to say no that wasn't possible and we still haven't had any contact with our grandchild.
From what I can gather it was my daughter wish that her child wasn't to return to us and to place the child in care. The only reason I can conclude that my daughter had done this is out of spite. When my grandchild was first placed in our care we made sure that my daughter had contact even though she was in hospital, she was able to FaceTime every day,and when she was discharged from hospital she was able to see her child whenever she wanted to buy she wasn't allowed unsupervised visits. Then some of my daughter's actions I felt could possibly be detrimental to my grandchild mental wellbeing and it was when I raised these concerns to my daughter communication between us (on my daughter's side) broke down, I had raised these concerns to social services the previous week before my grandchild was out into care in the hope they could possibly suggest mediation between myself and my daughter. Although communication had broken down between myself and my daughter she still had FaceTime with my grandchild when she wanted to and we never stopped my daughter coming to see her child if she wanted to.
I am of the understanding that social services have or are applying to the court for a Care Order of my grandchild, I have emailed social services to ask initially for answers to certain questions which as yet I haven't heard back from them, but also asking what I can do to have my grandchild returned to us but again no reply.
As I have said the only reason I can think of as to why social services acted like they did was due to my daughter not wanting us to continue to look after our grandchild, because up until the day they told us that my grandchild wasn't returning to us social services didn't appear to have any reasons to suggest that we were not caring for our grandchild, meeting her physical needs and her emotional needs (as best we could) because we couldn't tell my grandchild why she was staying with us because social services still hadn't out a narrative in place.
Sorry for such a long post, there are other issues around my daughter since being discharged from hospital but that would take too long to explain.
Any help as to what we can do and where we stand would be very gratefully received.
From what I can gather it was my daughter wish that her child wasn't to return to us and to place the child in care. The only reason I can conclude that my daughter had done this is out of spite. When my grandchild was first placed in our care we made sure that my daughter had contact even though she was in hospital, she was able to FaceTime every day,and when she was discharged from hospital she was able to see her child whenever she wanted to buy she wasn't allowed unsupervised visits. Then some of my daughter's actions I felt could possibly be detrimental to my grandchild mental wellbeing and it was when I raised these concerns to my daughter communication between us (on my daughter's side) broke down, I had raised these concerns to social services the previous week before my grandchild was out into care in the hope they could possibly suggest mediation between myself and my daughter. Although communication had broken down between myself and my daughter she still had FaceTime with my grandchild when she wanted to and we never stopped my daughter coming to see her child if she wanted to.
I am of the understanding that social services have or are applying to the court for a Care Order of my grandchild, I have emailed social services to ask initially for answers to certain questions which as yet I haven't heard back from them, but also asking what I can do to have my grandchild returned to us but again no reply.
As I have said the only reason I can think of as to why social services acted like they did was due to my daughter not wanting us to continue to look after our grandchild, because up until the day they told us that my grandchild wasn't returning to us social services didn't appear to have any reasons to suggest that we were not caring for our grandchild, meeting her physical needs and her emotional needs (as best we could) because we couldn't tell my grandchild why she was staying with us because social services still hadn't out a narrative in place.
Sorry for such a long post, there are other issues around my daughter since being discharged from hospital but that would take too long to explain.
Any help as to what we can do and where we stand would be very gratefully received.