BP not bothering with contact

[NannyS]

Hi I’m new here. I have sgo for my 3 youngest grandchildren. The eldest is 5 with severe autism and GDD, the next is 4 and “normal” the baby who I’ve had since birth is 3 next month and is also autistic. Bp have not bothered seeing the children since November 2019. They occasionally ring up ask to see the kids (last time was Christmas) I’ve said no as there is no consistency to this and I don’t feel it’s in the children’s best interests. They don’t send them birthday cards or Christmas cards. It’s very frustrating but my main priority is safeguarding the children. What I want to know is if I can take this back to court and get the sgos amended as they were given monthly contact but never stuck to it. Many thanks in advance

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear NannyS

Welcome to the kinship carers’ discussion board and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie, FRG’s online adviser. I am sorry to hear of the difficulties your family has experienced. Please accept my apologies for the delay in responding to your post.

Your query is about going back to court to apply to have the contact arrangements for your grandchildren to see their parents stopped or varied as the parents have been inconsistent in seeing the children, although they did ask to see them at Christmas which you refused. The children are young and two have autism so I can understand your wish for them to have stability, good routines and for any contact to be consistent. Contact is always about the children’s needs. Contact can also come in different forms and doesn’t always have to be face to face.

You might find some of the tips in this guide helpful generally, not just in relation to contact during the pandemic.

You could go back to children’s services to discuss the current issues around contact and to ask for their support and advice if that would help. They can (but don't have to) provide support to anyone affected by special guardianship.

If the court made a Child Arrangements Order (CAO) setting out the arrangements for contact between the children and their parents then you (or the parents) could take this back to court if needed. Where there is a CAO in place the court expects that it will be followed so it would be best to ask the court to look at it again. You can get detailed advice on this from Child Law Advice or have a look at their helpful flowchart which sets out the different options including how to vary or discharge an order; it also provides a link to the court forms.

If the court did not make a CAO but left contact to your discretion then you are allowed to manage and make the decisions about contact in the children’s best interests. However, you should consult with the children’s parents about this.

I hope this helps.

If you would like to discuss the situation with an adviser, please call our freephone advice helpline on 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, between 9.30 am and 3.00 pm.

With best wishes

Suzie