Why do they twist words

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Cupcake1
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Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:16 pm

Why do they twist words

Post by Cupcake1 » Wed Sep 16, 2020 3:38 pm

To cut along story short my GS has gone into foster care after being released from hospital. I am still unclear to what has happened but they say the child has non-accidental bruising.
I have had a viability assessment even through I do not agree with everything she has put down because some of it is down to her assumptions and presumptions. We have been recommended to go forward for SGO, which I have no problem with. However I learnt today from my daughter that some of my statements made have been misinterpreted and that they are building a case against my daughter. They have no evidence. I am very angry that 1. they have twisted my words and embellished the statement. 2. they have not given a reason why my GS cannot stay with me whilst further assessments are done.
I am more than happy to work with children services however when they start to fabricate the truth it is very worrying that they have power, and make decisions which can destroy a family.
I am unsure what I can do and feel totally out of my depth. I have until tomorrow to make a reply but unsure as to what I am replying to. Any advice and help would be very much appreciated.

Cupcake

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 11:25 am

Re: Why do they twist words

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Sep 21, 2020 1:17 pm

Dear Cupcake

Welcome to Family Rights Group’s family and friends carers’ discussion board. My name is Suzie and I am FRG’s online adviser.

I am sorry to hear that your grandson has been hurt and that there is a concern around possible non-accidental bruising to him. This can be a complex medical issue and, of course, is very distressing. There is some information about alleged non-accidental injuries on the following website (child protection resource online) which you/your family may find helpful: the social worker tells me my child has been hurt and what happens when a child gets hurt and we don’t know who did it. You can also find information on the parents accused website .

It is good to hear that following your viability assessment children’s services’ recommendation is that you should be assessed as a possible special guardian which, if successful, would give you parental responsibility for your grandson and allow you to raise him, if his parent/s can't. Here is our advice sheet on this DIY Special Guardianship Orders – information for family and friends carers .

Your worry is that you believe some of what you have said has been misinterpreted by the social worker and may be used against your daughter. You state that they have no evidence and are concerned that they are fabricating the truth. It is important to be aware that the standard of proof in family cases is ‘on the balance of probabilities’ and that children’s services’ main aim is to protect your grandson. I understand that it is a very difficult situation for the whole family but it is really important that you do continue to work with children’s services so that you can care for your grandson, if needed. They would expect you to accept at least the possibility that someone may have harmed your grandson. Of course, if there are factual errors or what you have said has been exaggerated in the report you should try to address or clarify them. You mention that you had to provide a reply last week and were unsure about what you had to reply to. I am sorry we were not able to respond to you before then; you have probably already replied to children’s services by now and I hope that the situation is a little clearer?

You can of course ask your grandson’s social worker to explain why they want him to remain in foster care for now rather than placing him with you whilst your assessments are being done. However, as he went into foster care on discharge from hospital (rather than being placed with you – you would have had to have been temporarily approved as a foster carer first) it is likely that they want to make sure that he has stability (and reduce 'moves' to different carers) until a final decision is made, by the court.

Perhaps you would like to post back with an update/new query or you might prefer to speak to an adviser by ringing our freephone advice line on 0808 8010366. The line is open from 9.30 am to 3.00 pm, Mon to Fri.

I hope this is helpful.

With best wishes
Suzie

Cupcake1
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:16 pm

Re: Why do they twist words

Post by Cupcake1 » Mon Oct 05, 2020 3:41 pm

An update, today they have said that they do not want to move my grandson from foster and I cannot see him until our guardianship assessment is complete, however this has not yet started and looks like this will not be completed until end of Jan 2021!! As you mentioned they want to make sure he has stability , however I am still struggling to get my head around this, as a loving youngish grandparent why do I feel that they are just being awkward? I was told my grandson guardian would be in contact, but no nothing, I was told that the contact plan changes but not as fair as I have been told, only my daughter has supervised contact.
I have contacted them several times trying to communicate and work with them asking for contact and to get the assessment rolling but all i got was a very short email not even acknowledging my concerns. They did say that they can review Reg 24 so he could come into my care for the interim period once they have character references. Yet again I've not heard anything.
Having spoken to a couple of solicitors 1 has said no do not rock the boat or your guardian assessment will be negative as they will view that you cannot work with them, another says file for an interim care order saying that you will work with children services by guided and follow a robust care plan. So now I'm confused.

Cupcake1
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:16 pm

Re: Why do they twist words

Post by Cupcake1 » Mon Oct 19, 2020 1:01 pm

We had our first initial guardianship meeting which got changed last minute to a face to face to a virtual call. The social worker thought that our GS was already with us?? It just shows that they do not read their own reports before making contact.
We learnt a bit more about our GS and the case. Interestingly enough the Senior Social Worker agreed with our concerns and that he should be placed with us, so we can continue to build a secure attachment. Currently my GS has been with the foster carer for 2 months. If we do not hear by the end of the week on whether our GS can come to us, as there is no reason why he shouldn't then we will file in court for an interim care order. We have waited patiently for them to carry out assessments etc but it has not been forthcoming from their side.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Re: Why do they twist words

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Dec 07, 2020 9:24 pm

Dear Cupcake1,

Thank you very much for taking the time to post and I am sorry to hear that that you are having difficulties with your SGO assessment. As I understand your grandson is currently in foster care, you have had a positive viability assessment but your full SGO assessment is ongoing.

I am not clear how long this has been going on for, when it is expected to be completed or what stage the court proceedings are at.

I would say that SGO assessments are in depth assessments and they do take around 12 weeks to be completed. It is the assessors role during this time to understand your backgrounds and your experiences to ensure that there are no concerns regarding your ability to care for the children you are being assessed to care for. It is usual practice for them to ask for detailed information regarding your background and your friends and family support.

It is not uncommon for children not to be placed with the prospective SG’s prior to the assessment being completed as in order for this to happen you would have to also be assessed and approved as foster carers – even if this is as temporary carers. It is possible for the assessments to run concurrently and this would allow your grandson to be placed with you whilst this happens, however whether this is suitable in your situation would depend on the stage that your assessment is at.

If a child remains in foster care during the assessment, when this is completed (and is positive) the local authority will then apply to the courts to end the care order and grant the Special Guardianship Order, and at this point the child is able to move to live with the Special Guardians.

If you don’t already have the details, then I would recommend asking your assessing social worker when they expect the assessment to be completed and presented to the relevant panel within the local authority. Also, you should ensure that you have information regarding the court proceedings and any scheduled hearing dates, in particular the final hearing. Do you have a solicitor? If not you may want to see if you are entitled to legal aid to enable you to get a solicitor. Social services may pay for an initial consultation if not.

You may wish to have a look at our advice sheets , if you have not already, and in particular the advice regarding special guardianship Orders in advice sheet 19, this sheet explains the orders and the application process in more detail and also sets out how to get legal advice if you have not already done so. It is aimed at those who applying for the order themselves but I think you will find some useful information in it.

I would also recommend the advice sheet for friends and family placements, pages 15-16 should be the most relevant to your situation. Finally, advice sheet 14 gives some information about having contact with children in care and the local authority should assess the suitability of you having contact with your grandson whilst he remains in care.

I would also recommend that you visit the Grandparents Plus website as I think you may find some other useful resources there.

I hope this has been helpful, but please call our advice line on 0800 801 0366 if you need any more help, the line is open Monday-Friday 9.30-3.

Best Wishes,
Suzie

Cupcake1
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:16 pm

Re: SGO ongoing

Post by Cupcake1 » Tue May 04, 2021 4:04 pm

An update our SGO still hasn't been filed. We were told it was to be filed Dec 20, Jan, Feb then March, now we are told it will be the 4th May. I do not have any confidence with the LA to actually get this done, the fact hearing took place in March the Judges finding was given out to all parties on the 31st March. We was told that the SW would be returning to go over the findings and to add anything further to our assessment. This has not taken place. I am presuming that this will delay the process yet again.
I have been having contact with my GS every month and have attended his LACC reviews, and it is encouraging to hear that he is settled and his physical health is good. There are concerns in regards to his social behaviour an other concerns which they are currently monitoring.

The actions or lack of from the LA is very concerning. MY solicitor has been unable to get any response out of them, we only just got the fact hearing report through.

Cupcake1
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:16 pm

Re: Negative

Post by Cupcake1 » Fri May 14, 2021 9:49 pm

We had a visit from our SW who has now changed his outcome from a positive assessment to a negative one. We are both baffled as to how this has changed when all along he has said it is positive. We feel that the LA legal team has put pressure on him 1) to not file the report when he said he would 2) change the outcome.
We went through the fact hearing report and we agreed with what the judges findings were, even though we was not prevue to all of the evidence we know something has happened.
The SW said that he could not pinpoint exactly what is negative but he has concerns over me in particular; 1) I didn't disclose my parents religious beliefs and I obvious was raised within that religion. However I myself am not religious and have practice no faith since I left school.
2) He could not speak to my ex-husband the father of my 1st child who is 32 years old!
3) I didn't raise concerns in regards to my daughter and her contact with ex-boyfriend
4) it doesn't add up?? whatever that means
We have not received a copy of the report yet, but I feel that the SW has not been honest with us from the start. He has an unconscious bias against myself and how my parents brought me up.
He recommends that we have a psychological assessment, and that we can contest his report which we will.
I cannot put into words how I feel, but do believe that they have their own hidden agenda. We seemed to be lead along feed empty promises to now come down to this.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 11:25 am

Re: Why do they twist words

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Thu May 20, 2021 12:07 pm

Dear Cupcake1

Welcome back to the kinship carers’ forum and thank you for your further posts. I am sorry that there has been a delay in my response. Clearly the situation has changed dramatically from your first post earlier this month to your latest post.

On the positive side, I am glad to hear that you have been having regular contact with your grandson, that he is settled and healthy and that you have been able to attend his LAC reviews. There are some concerns about him but they are being monitored.

You have explained that the Fact-Finding Hearing has now taken place and you agree with/accept the judge’s findings; this may be an important factor.

However, I am very sorry to hear that the special guardianship assessment you have fought so hard to complete has very recently been changed from a positive to a negative. The social worker has given you some idea of the areas of concern that he identified but you had not received the completed assessment when you posted here last week.

I hope that you have now received the assessment and that you have arranged with your solicitor to go through it carefully and to consider how to respond to the concerns raised by the social worker. The assessment is a social work report for the court. Some of the difficulties described to you by the social worker do seem somewhat vague but hopefully they are more detailed in the written report. You will need to think very carefully about each of the negatives identified, your opinion on them and what you can do, where possible, to address them.

You have already decided to challenge his assessment and luckily you have a solicitor to assist you with this. Have you talked to your solicitor about your concern that the social worker has been biased towards you? Have you discussed asking the court to consider an independent social work report ? I wonder if you know the Guardians’ stance on your assessment. Are you willing to have the psychological assessment to help inform the court’s decision? Here is some information about psychological assessments to help you.

I can understand your upset and frustration; you have been very consistent in insisting that you are assessed for care of your grandson and that you and he are able to spend time together to build your relationship. You have had to deal with a many delays and frustrations and have managed to work with children’s services despite this. This is a further obstacle which you determined to overcome, if you can.

Please do post again or call the freephone advice line on 0808 801 0366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm, if we can help with any further queries.

With best wishes

Suzie

Cupcake1
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:16 pm

Re: Why do they twist words

Post by Cupcake1 » Thu Jun 10, 2021 10:11 am

It has been agreed today that we will be going through an Independent assessment as the previous SGO was biased and we was not given a fair outcome. It has also been agreed that my visits to see my GS will be increased which is absolutely brilliant and that I am now party to proceedings. It has taken 10 months of grit and determination to get this far. My confidence and opinion of the LA is very low, I believe they have had their own agenda all along.
It does mean going through the whole process again, which I am not looking forward to.

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