My son is on an SGO removed by social services

[Decante]

Hello,

So about 9 year ago my son was placed with his dad sister, everything has been so up and down stop and starting contact they went in to have their own kids and said that their kids come before contact. They said my son's circumstances have already robbed there children of having an ordinary life. My son doesn't call me mam he calls them mam, which they allowed him to and didn't correct him.

Any how two days ago I received a phone call from social services to say that there has been an incident and my son along with there two children have been removed, they said that his aunt made a report about domestic violence against her partner she then fleed too a refuge with the children but according to social services police had went to get a few things and had concerns around the home and the care the children are receiving, I had a few concerns but was being fobbed off by the guardians but then before Christmas they stopped my contact only because I asked to see him a few days before Xmas to give him his Christmas presents but they said no they have a lot on and their kids come first before him, anywho as social services are looking more at long term placement i have asked to be assess to have my son back long-term in my care, ky circumstances have change alot since the SGO was placed since went on to have my daughter, i havent had any involvement with social services for at least 7 years now, im in a really good relationship he took on my daughter she idolises him, he met my son on contact and it was like they new each other, my son couldbr leave his side.

As it's the new year we are currently looking for somewhere bigger we are currently in a two bedroom flat, but my daughter's room is so small it wouldn't fit them both in, but my long-term goal was actually getting a house and be a family, I don't want my son going back to them they already told me they were struggling and they also sent my son to school through the holidays so it's not like he's at home much they might as well have put him in boarding school. As their two boys are the centre of everyone he often feels excluded and felt he didn't belong there as a family, my whole goal was to take it back to court and get more access to him because of how often they stop and start contact.

But for now I'm just wondering what happens to the SGO and where do I legally stand with this?

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Decante

Thank you for posting again.

I am sorry that you have continued to have difficulties regarding contact with your son. The situation has now changed because he has been removed from the care of the special guardians and children’s services have rightly informed you about this as you still have parental responsibility for your son.

Children’s services should share with you the concerns they have about your son but because there is a special guardianship order, the special guardians can say what they want to happen and tell children’s services how much information they want them to disclose about them.

There must be serious safeguarding concerns about your son’s and the other children’s care for them to be removed. You have done the right thing to ask children’s services to assess you, but it will depend on how they intend to deal with the case. Although the children have been removed, this could be temporary whilst they carry out their investigations and not a permanent removal. Children’s services should inform you of what assessment is being carried out and their plan for your son.

As your son has been removed from the special guardians’ care, you may wish to consider applying to the court to discharge the special guardianship order so your son can live with you. The special guardians would be able to challenge your application if they wish to continue as special guardians. You would need to show the court that it is in your son’s best interest to live with you.

Your legal position remains the same at present as there is a special guardianship order, this means you still have parental responsibility for your son, but the special guardians’ parental responsibility is over an above yours. Please read the advice sheet HERE for more information for parents when there is a special guardianship order

If you wish, you are still able to apply to the court to change the order to increase your son’s contact with you. As mentioned above, any order the court makes will be based on what is in your son’s best interests.

I hope this is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

[Decante]

They said there was domestic violence and then police took his aunty and the children back to the house but when they entered they said the house was in unsanitary conditions and that they admitted to living like that for months they were both arrested although the partner was previously arrested for domestic violence with further charges of neglect they are on police bail, they said they will assess me as part of the long term plan for him.

[Decante]

There is a meeting tomorrow taking place and the social worker has said she would update me after that, but currently he is in foster care, and they currently want him to remain in the school, I can't see social services giving him back to them as they had sent him to school all through the holidays so that they can have 'family time' with there own two sons .

They have already highlighted in emails that my son circumstances has already robbed there children of normal family life, and that sometimes they wish the easiest option for them would be to put him back in to care.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Decante,

Thank you for your further two posts. I will reply to both here.

It is very good to hear that the social worker has said that you will be assessed now that the long term plans for your son are being considered due to recent events.

I hope that the information in the reply to your previous post was helpful as you continue to work with children's services in considering your son's best interests and future care.

If you require further advice in the future you can post again here or call the advice line. We also have webchat or you can submit a web enquiry email. Details of all these options are here Further Advice Options

Best wishes,
Suzie

[Decante]

Hi Suzie,

Thank you, it is I've just received PLO letter today and said they have serious concerns it seems DV has been happening for a long time even at the time social services placed my son there.

The social worker have said that there was no assessments made at the time they placed him there, which social services had put him at risk in the first place, also there was lack of parenting assessments for my self. Which they said was wrong as that should have been done when my son dad was asked to leave the home.

The home conditions were closed as a danger to life and horrendous chaotic and a failure to the children to thrive no space for them to play, they had no clean clothes, there was no food in.

They took me and his dad to CSA social services can't understand why they couldn't manage finances due to what they were getting it turns out they were trying for another baby, am absolutely gutted, the aunty has said her wife has been controlling her but now it makes me think was it her that was stopping my contact, they wouldn't let me see him at one point and I spent hundreds of pounds staying down there for the weekend for them to not turn up then they stopped it for a year haven't told him an his real name, he always called me by my name, he's told social services he's never refused to see me and always looked forward to it, he got excited the last two times I did see him.

I'm seeing a solicitor tomorrow to see where I legally stand I believe I've made significant change and I believe in the best interest of him he should be in my care. I need to make a statement as to why I think this and I always seem to go blank at what to write, all I know is he deserves a better life, he needs showing love and care and that he would get it here and he'd be able to play and be at home rather than sent to school through holidays, he deserves to know what a family really is. Although mistakes were made when social services took him, which I believe was wrong. I know all I've done is fought to be the mother i should be to him, it's been hard it's got me down but I've never given up.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Decante

Thank you for your further update.

From what you have written you will have met with a solicitor, but it may be helpful for you, or others reading your posts to have a definition of some of the terminology that you will or might come across during this process.

You have said that you were going to a PLO (public law outline) meeting, and this is because your child was in a home where there was DV (domestic violence/abuse). I am sorry to read about that and the other concerns that were raised and highlighted.

You said that your child was under an SGO (special guardianship order) to his aunt and that contact arrangements were sometimes difficult. You indicate that your child is currently in the care of the local authority, here is our webpage about how ‘welfare’ decisions are made for children.

I hope this information is helpful to you.

Best wishes
Suzie

[Decante]

Hi Suzie,
I spoke with my solicitor who states that it has put me in a better position even more so having a daughter at home, PLO meeting is Friday coming, she insists that contact is a must, and knows that contact has been a struggle, not because of myself I've showed her emails, and she insisted that I've been subject to emotional abuse, and they've been controlling the situation, and that my son has been denied the right to know me as his mam, she said all isn't right.

She said it would be stupid to put him in long term foster care when I can show that I can look after a child I've had no involvement with social services, no concerns made by anyone, my daughter is described as a happy child who likes to talk about me quite regularly. She quite openly said she would be happy to talk to anyone about me, she's only 8 bless her but she knows.

My solicitor told me to look for local school and asked what family I had for support, obviously there's my partner and his family, my son has met my partner and he wouldn't leave his side held his hands and give him lots of cuddles.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Decante

Thank you for your updating post.

It is good that you have now instructed a solicitor and have had advice which is more directly related to your situation rather than the general advice I am able to provide.

Your solicitor will be able to obtain information relating to your situation from children’s services and advise you.

I think your solicitor is right that you are in a strong position having your other child in your care. Children’s services will assess you to satisfy themselves that you would be able to meet the needs of the children. It appears they recognise the difficulties you experienced with the special guardians especially in respect of contact.

Hopefully, things can now progress so you can have the outcome that you want for you and your children. You should continue to work with your solicitor who seem to have a good understanding of your case.

Best wishes

Suzie

[Decante]

So just a little update. I'm currently going through parenting assessment. The social worker is lovely we've talked about my past and how my son's case was handled and how she received files with missing pages including assessments on the person who holds the SGO.

My son is currently in a foster placement, bail conditions for the two people set to expire on the 13 March, as this is based on north Yorkshire he is on a section 20, which they said is valid whilst going through assessments, plus as there are bail conditions they didn't go to court for a care order. Social worker has stated I meet with her then see my son but doesn't think there is any need for supervised contact and said that after the meeting, she will arrange for a weekend contact, where my daughter can see him too, and then going on from there over night contact, social worker wants my son to be with me and has said due to his current foster placement ending she doesn't think there is a need for him to go into another one so is hoping to place him here but said she needed to seek legal advice to see if they could override the SGO, obviously will be going to court as well as they have two other children, plus due to my son age and him going to high school in September they wish to make the move sooner rather than waiting until the six weeks holidays.

She asked that if he came here how and if I would maintain contact with the two people, I said well to be fair it would be up to my son but rather him be settled first and then decide, he's been through an awful lot and no one knows how it has effected him, although there isn't just them to consider, there is the two younger boys they have and then, the people who he's grew up to call 'grandparents' there not legally grandparents by any means so wouldn't legally have a right to see him.

My partner has said that if they wish to see him then they should come and see him. As we both will be working and we would have to take time off to accommodate this, and if we were to travel down, we would have to book hotels and then there is my daughter to consider too, although she doesn't mind the travel and staying in hotels but she is autistic and t can be quite stressful on her sometimes.

My question is can social services over ride the SGO?

Can they place him with me as a family and friend foster carer under the section 20?

Or would they have to weight it out till bail conditions are up and go in for a care order? And be another few months until it's alsorted?.

There is a PLO review on Tuesday as they wanted to figure a permanent plan for my son, so that it's all set out and what would happen next in regards to their bail conditions. My son is like a different person he's more chatty, he seems more happy and relaxed away from them, he tells me he loves me and can't wait to see me, he told the social worker he wants to be with my and my partner, it so hard becAuse I want to be able to ask him and hear him say it rather than having to hear it from someone else, social worker has spoken to him briefly about some of the options that could be available.

I had asked her, if the parenting assessment failed which I couldn't see how with having my daughter, where would that leave her, she stated she can't see it being a fail considering the massive changes I've made and I've raised my daughter well, and she's not here to judge and they can't use my passed against me as there has been significant change, and she wants my son to be with us, as he needs stability love and to be away from the younger ones, just to have a break, it's hard for him as he's in placement with the two little ones as well and they require a lot of attention, due to behavior and medical conditions.

My son's dad doesn't want anything to do with him, although has stated he is happy for him to come here and for my partner to bring him up. He's having a son with his current partner, and he's not allowed to see my two oldest girls.

Apart from adoption, could the courts give my partner parental responsibility? As we are both being assessed for him to be with us.

Hopefully he comes home to us.