Reunification and ending care order

[Stormybassist]

Hi, myself and my wife have 2 children, a boy and a girl aged 11 and 9 respectively. Just over 5 years ago we had some issues with drug addiction and ended up 5 years ago entering a section 20 supposedly to give us time to sort ourselves out. However a few months later at the PLO it was decided to go to court to remove our children permanently. This took some time to happen but finally the order was made in February 2020 for Foster care. However after lockdown it was decided the children could stay with my mother as they'd been there 2 years already at that point. We continued to have supervised contact 1 hour a week at a council contact centre until April 2023, when it switched to fortnightly in the community supervised by my Mum. This started at 2 hours/fortnight then was increased to 3 then eventually 4 hours + extras for school, medical etc by the end of last year. In January this year, just before the LAC review we received a phone call from *** (IRO) suggesting we ask at the meeting to be reassessed and she would support that. This duly happened and we met the new social worker for the first time. An appointment was set for the end of January for her to come out and start the assessment however this was then postponed for 2 weeks and when it finally came around it was another new social worker called ***. He assured us that he'd be staying on for the duration, and so far he has. After 2 meetings with him and quite a way through the assessment information gathering process he increased our contact to 9 hours weekly supervised by my Mum during February and then unsupervised from April. On top of this we also take the kids to boxing and swimming classes 3 weeknights after school and can attend all school/medical appointments. All seemed to be moving along well - the assessment was going to be positive, following consultation with his manager they felt that drug testing wasn't required so he just needed to get his report finished for the next LAC review which was scheduled for early July. This unfortunately didn't happen, as apparently he'd been overburdened with cases and had a family in the same situation as us go to court - therefore they'd taken priority over us. The IRO didn't seem that impressed but he assured her that he just needed a week or so to finish off the report and it was going to be positive. At the end of the meeting we all talked it through and it was decided that another meeting would take place in a fortnight to sign everything off and move forward. We were given a date of 28th August for the children to be back with us full time and a fazed integration over the summer of 3 nights then 4 nights etc and those dates were confirmed with my mother. The IRO also said that we'd need to sort out a school transfer for **** (my daugher), as we live in *** and *** is currently still at *** School. ***(my son) is transferring to *** Comp - also nowhere near us but some much effort has gone into his transition there that it seemed a shame to spoil that. I duly got on with applying to the council to sort ***(my daughter's) school place and forwarded everything to the social worker. Anyway forward a couple of weeks to the end of term and we get a phone call from the social worker saying he hasn't managed to get his report finished so the meeting is being postponed. He also said that Virtual Schools had blocked the school move for *** (my daughter) saying they'd like her to be settled with us for perhaps 6 months before considering a transfer. Fair does I could see the point so whilst an inconvenience it wasn't the end of the world to us. A week later however I got an email from the school opposite our home asking us to take ***(my daughter) in to meet her new teachers and for a tour. I immediately contacted the social worker and *** (PEP) to find out what was happening as I figured they mustve had a change of heart. Unfortunately not though, they simply hadn't stopped the council from processing the transfer - something I now had to do, which tbh was like a slap in the face after us and the children had explained that *** (my daughter) desperately wanted a fresh start as *** (my son) was getting. The pair of them get bullied at ***school and really don't fit in there at all. It was at this point also we were informed that the assessment report was incomplete - the DBS checks had come back and mine were fine however ***(my wife's) didn't have a date on and so the plan couldn't yet be ratified. We were - as a token gesture given overnight unsupervised once a week. So a week or so later they finally had the missing date and the meeting could go ahead, but *** (IRO) said she wouldn't sign anything off without a more independent drug history, a series of 3 hair strand tests (1 now, 1 midway through reunification and a final 1 before full time placement) and a *** parenting course. She also said that they couldn't give us overnight contact without her approval- which the social services disputed and then took a further couple of weeks to resolve (albeit with us continuing the overnights in the meantime) but ***(social worker's) manager and also my Mums social worker were adament they had the power to do that. So in the wake of this we immediately got on with what we could - I contacted the local family hub to arrange the parenting course and as per usual by August when ***(social worker) came out to do the independent drug history we still hadn't heard back about the course. I asked if he would phone up, which he did and that then got us a link to the *** course online and the manager suggested 3 units to complete- we've actually done 6 each now and sent copies of certificates to ***(social worker). On that day we went through the drug history completely and that night I sent a further email to him as a footnote of things we'd thought of after the meeting. He'd said on that day aswell though that from their point of view they didn't particularly want to do the drug tests. They'd looked into the possibility of free tests through Human Kind but were told noone would carry out tests for clean non users that wouldn't require treatment. They needed to get legal to sign off on the tests and that still hasn't happened. The last I knew 2 weeks ago ***(social worker) went off on the sick and hasn't responded to any communication since and we now just feel in limbo. Honestly the mental roller coaster both us and the children have been on this year has been absolutely unbearable and we're beginning to wonder if there ever is an end to it.
Anyway that's where we stand currently and we really don't know how best to proceed from here - part of us wishes we'd just gone to court in the first place.
Kind regards

*Edited by Suzie for confidentiality purposes

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Stormybassist


Thank you for your post and welcome to the Board.

From what you have written it seems ‘you have been on a mental roller coaster’. It also seems that the plan for reunification is slow but reaching a pace that (from what you have written) will lead to your family living together again.

It may be a good idea for you to raise your concerns about the delays and ‘hurdles’ you are finding in the process. You could mention the impact that it has had on you and undoubtedly the children too, whose ‘voices’/views might perhaps be sought again given that they too are expecting to be reunited.

You could indicate that you have prepared yourself for reunification and complied with every ‘instruction’, suggestion or request the professionals have asked of you and are working in partnership with them (see definition of partnership by scrolling down this webpage).

Additionally, you might mention how the delays are impacting the (reunification) care plan, which you may have a copy of.

Alternatively, which is what you suggest as an option is to apply to discharge the care order, and here is some guidance, see page 129.

Your local authority may have a procedures manual in which they advise on the process for reunification, do check their website searching the term “discharging a care order.” Child Law Advice has a paragraph about the process too, you can find it here.

I hope these suggestions are helpful.

Best wishes
Suzie