Social services involved
Social services involved
Hi I called the police out in May as my boyfriend had assaulted me. Since then he's been contacting me trying to get me to sort things out with him (he has no idea i called the police). I found out through the police that his previous partner has an outstanding non molestation order & that there is a previous allegation of dv. He also has previous convictions which I did know about. Both the police & my family want me to take it further as they think I have a case. Ive filed the report currently as I'm finding it really hard as I still love him. He's apologised to me & part of me wants to believe that he is truly sorry & part of me wishes that I didn't call the police out & that I let him come back & we had of sorted everything out. I can't help feeling like I messed up the relationship & that we might still be together if I hadn't called the police. I now have social services involved as I have a child from a previous relationship & have been truthful that I had feelings about potentially wanting to go back to him & told them that I wasn't planning on having him in my house or anywhere near my child anytime soon. Currently it is at a child in need plan as I was told they don't have concerns about me but if I go back to him it will be escalated to a child protection plan. Would they even let us get back together. I've never had social services involved before so have no idea what a child protection plan would involve.
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Suzie, FRG Adviser
- Posts: 4240
- Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm
Re: Social services involved
Dear Mum1193,
Welcome to the parents’ forum and thank you for your post. I am sorry to hear about the difficult time that you are going through, and that you were the victim of an assault by your ex-boyfriend.
You would like some information about what a child protection plan would involve, and you are unsure what the consequences might be if you restart your relationship with him.
Firstly, we have information on our website HERE about the child protection process and about child protection plans HERE. I would suggest that you read through this information as it is very thorough and explains what you should expect if your child becomes subject to a child protection plan.
It seems that children’s services and the police have quite significant concerns about your ex-boyfriend, and from the history that you describe it is clear that this assault was not a ‘one off’. I think it would be a good idea for you to get some support for yourself as you are a victim of a domestic assault, and you are struggling with knowing what you should do next. The Freedom Programme is a free course which can be done online or in person, which many victims of domestic abuse find very helpful. Women’s Aid and Refuge are national charities which also work with people who have experienced domestic abuse, and you may find it helpful to look on their websites or contact them to find out if they can offer you any support. You can find details of other relevant organisations on our useful links section HERE. The social worker may know of local organisations and I would suggest that you ask them about this to see if there is any support that you can access locally.
I would like to highlight that you did the right thing by calling the police when your ex-boyfriend assaulted you. Research shows that incidents of domestic abuse are almost never ‘one off’ incidents and if you hadn’t called the police after that incident then it is likely that it would have happened again (and, as you now know, he has done it before to a previous partner). Research shows that children who live in homes where domestic abuse takes place suffer long term consequences and this is why children’s services take domestic abuse incidents very seriously. You can find more information about children’s services involvement when there are concerns about domestic abuse on our website HERE.
I hope that this is of some help. Please post again if you have any further queries or you can call our free, confidential adviceline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm). We also have a webchat which is currently open on Monday and Wednesday afternoons.
Best wishes,
Suzie
Welcome to the parents’ forum and thank you for your post. I am sorry to hear about the difficult time that you are going through, and that you were the victim of an assault by your ex-boyfriend.
You would like some information about what a child protection plan would involve, and you are unsure what the consequences might be if you restart your relationship with him.
Firstly, we have information on our website HERE about the child protection process and about child protection plans HERE. I would suggest that you read through this information as it is very thorough and explains what you should expect if your child becomes subject to a child protection plan.
It seems that children’s services and the police have quite significant concerns about your ex-boyfriend, and from the history that you describe it is clear that this assault was not a ‘one off’. I think it would be a good idea for you to get some support for yourself as you are a victim of a domestic assault, and you are struggling with knowing what you should do next. The Freedom Programme is a free course which can be done online or in person, which many victims of domestic abuse find very helpful. Women’s Aid and Refuge are national charities which also work with people who have experienced domestic abuse, and you may find it helpful to look on their websites or contact them to find out if they can offer you any support. You can find details of other relevant organisations on our useful links section HERE. The social worker may know of local organisations and I would suggest that you ask them about this to see if there is any support that you can access locally.
I would like to highlight that you did the right thing by calling the police when your ex-boyfriend assaulted you. Research shows that incidents of domestic abuse are almost never ‘one off’ incidents and if you hadn’t called the police after that incident then it is likely that it would have happened again (and, as you now know, he has done it before to a previous partner). Research shows that children who live in homes where domestic abuse takes place suffer long term consequences and this is why children’s services take domestic abuse incidents very seriously. You can find more information about children’s services involvement when there are concerns about domestic abuse on our website HERE.
I hope that this is of some help. Please post again if you have any further queries or you can call our free, confidential adviceline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm). We also have a webchat which is currently open on Monday and Wednesday afternoons.
Best wishes,
Suzie
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