Social services saying me and partner cannot safely have child in are care

[Missbe1984]

I am feeling so stressed had all my assessments and ss want to put a court order for my be placed in full time foster care he has been put in care since March so six months has nearly finished my SS are worried about domestic violence and my partners drinking and mental health my partner is constantly drinking every day I just cannot take this anymore ss just take your kids and leave me with nothing no support I think they are right about my partners drinking because he will not stop and is using some of my money and constantly calling me I want to get out this realationship becose he will not change but I am trying to change and turn up to my appointments and contact and the parenting course I am in despair do no know what to do can you please give me some advice

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Missbe1984,

Thank you for your web enquiry.

Firstly, I am sorry to hear that you are feeling distressed.

You say that your children are in care proceedings. You have completed all your assessments and you say that
children's services would like to pursue a full care order. Children's services are concerned about domestic abuse and your partner's drinking and mental health. You say that your partner is misusing alcohol. You do not feel supported and say that you would like to leave the relationship and to make some positive changes, including attending contact and a parenting course.

Firstly, it is important that you fully understand what children's services concerns are and what steps they would like you to take to address these concerns. It is positive that you have some understanding of this, and have identified some areas of support you would like to engage with. It is important that you feel supported to access and engage with this support, and I would encourage you to talk to your solicitor and to the social worker about how this can be put in place. This will be important in making positive changes and in being able to show the court that you are working towards providing a safe home for your children.

From what you say, children's services appear to have some concerns about your partner and your relationship. You say you would like to leave this relationship. This is a brave step and you may need support from those around you to do this safely. Again, I would urge you to speak to your solicitor and to the social worker. There are organisations who can help you. You can call the national domestic abuse helpline for free, 24 hours a day, on 0808 2000 247.

You say that you have undergone your assessments. Please do go through these assessments with your solicitor. It is important that you understand why any assessments may be negative, if this is the case. Your solicitor will be able to advise you on what your next steps are in terms of challenging these.

You say that local authority are seeking a full care order - you will have the opportunity to contest this if you do not agree - again, your solicitor is the best person to advise you on this. In the meantime, you may find it helpful to take a look at our webpage on care proceedings and what to expect from each stage.

It is important that you continue to play a part of your children's lives and that you attend any reviews that are held, and that you are having consistent contact. I would also encourage you to think of others in your family network who may be able to look after your children in the eventuality they are not returned to you. You may have already done this, but is important that any possible alternative carers are assessed.

I hope you have found this helpful.

Best wishes,

Suzie.

[My09876]

Hey, hope all goes well with the final court hearing. I would suggest you leave your partner and hopefully get support from social services and work on safeguarding your child this is what they would want from you. Let me know how you get on I know it’s a lot harder saying that doing it when you’re in that situation but I’m sure you got this girl!xx