feel social work treatment very unfair

[Worriedmumof2x]

Just a bit of a background,
I have 2 children 3 years & 6 months, I am a student nurse and work as an auxiliary nurse, I have a disclosure to work with children and vulnerable adults, no criminal background, no drug or alcohol problems, nice home ect.

when my son was coming up on 3 months old my sons father squeezed him out of frustation fracturing 4 of his ribs, I did not know about this until my sons father told me what happened after I had taken baby to hospital & baby was scanned and fractured ribs came back, when he told me I called the police on him,

Since then I feel social work are making up a load of lies to keep my children from me, they have speculated I knew about this and prioritised my sons fathers needs ( this is not true )
They wrote in their report my sons fractures where healing fractured and I delayed getting medical help ( again this is not true, I have my sons medical notes which clearly state non healing fractures)
They are saying I am mentally and physically ill ( again, not true, these people are making me ill, currently awaiting a physiological assessment)
they are saying they are concerned there has been repeated abuse to my son and my daughter ( not true at all, I went on maternity leave very early and my sons dad worked 6 days per week, my daughter also attended nursery which the nursery have reported they had no concerns over my daughter, she was always healthy, happy, well presented and developed appropriately for her age)
my son had reflux which I had him back and forth to the dr’s about as I felt the things I was prescribed were not helping, due to this there was a drop in his centile and I also had some struggles breast feeding, however the drop in centile has been reported in SW reported it may be due to previous abuse,
all health visitor reports state the both kids are healthy, well looked after, home environment clear and uncluttered and how my daughter had a close bond with me and how I gently handled my son,

the social work are also saying by attending university I am putting that before my kids ( again, this is not true )
I am on maternity leave from university and don’t return till January as I requested extended leave due to this horrible situation but I have not decided if I will return yet,
they are also saying by working I am putting that before my children, but I pay my mother £150 a week for my kids, and I am trying to keep my home running for them to return to, I see my kids 5 days a week ( I am down from morning till night)
they are also saying that me wanting to return my kids home is a risk ( the house is in my name only, my sons dad has bail conditions not to enter my street) and it is me and my kids home? SW also stated to my mum “ mothers who are involved with social services don’t have careers or attend university)

I am at my wits end with these people now, i really do not think it’s fair I am being tore apart for something I did not do, the risk changes all the time one week it’s a risk I will sneak kids to their dad ( have told them time and time again I will never do this)
then it goes to mental health, physical health,
Any advice?
I have a lawyer, my grounds hearing is on Friday, the social are are applying for a compulsory supervision order

[Worriedmumof2x]

Also if this is any helpful information,
the CID have taken 2 statements from me ( one before my sons dad admitted, one after he admitted) I am now classed as a witness as he admitted this to me, so I gave police everything they needed, I am not in the pool of perpetrators.
My sons dad has been charged and he is awaiting trial, I had no concerns over him previously to this at all, no domestic abuse, no drug or alcohol problems, his mental health spiralled leading up to my son being born and really took a down hill after my son was born, I have explained all this to the social services that I was in complete shock through out the full hospital process and when he admitted it to me but I done the right thing reporting him, however this is seen as me prioritising his needs,
they said it is a requirement I go on a woman and childrens first programme, I agree’d I kept asking when they would refer me ( I was asking for around 10 weeks and kept getting told it would be done, so I ended up referring myself as if it’s a requirement I want it ticked off )
I have enrolled myself in parenting courses and currently going through a parenting capacity assessment with the social work and have 5 weeks left of that
can anyone provide similar outcomes from similar situations or any advice please?

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Worriedmumof2x

Welcome back to the parents’ discussion board and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie. I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser. I am sorry to hear that your son was hurt and the difficulties that you are experiencing.

I can see that you are in care proceedings. You stated that you have a court hearing on Friday so you are in court today, 23 June. You are represented by a solicitor. As your hearing is today hopefully your solicitor has prepared and advised you what to expect. You don’t say which hearing this is but I don’t think it is a final hearing, from your earlier posts.

You say that children’s services are seeking a supervision order . If this is not the final hearing then it is more likely to be an interim (temporary) supervision order. This would mean that children’s services have to remain involved for a defined period of time. But it would not give them parental responsibility. You would continue to be the main decision maker for your children.

It is good to hear that you have been proactive in referring yourself to services and you are engaging with the parenting capacity assessment. You are also cooperating with the criminal investigation and forthcoming trial of your ex-partner. These are all positives which the court will take into account.

Following today’s court perhaps you would like to do an updating post asking any further queries.

If you prefer, you can:

• Call our freephone advice line on 0808 8010366. The lines are open Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm, except bank holidays.
• Ask a question on our advice enquiry form
• Use our webchat service .

Best wishes

Suzie

[Worriedmumof2x]

Hi there,

Thanks for replying to me,

So it was a initial grounds hearing! the social work reccomended no legal orders to be put in place as myself and my sons dad are fully co operating and they don’t feel any parents would remove my son or go out with the social work plan,

I have around 4 weeks left of my parenting assessment however my social worker said the plan can still progress during the parenting assessment, all contact from contact centre has been positive, my social worker said I am highly engadged and committed to the kids which is a positive,
so I was granted unsuoervised contact with my kids at a core group meeting a few days after the hearing so I now take my kids out myself 5 days a week which is going really well!

there is no going home date set yet they said they have to be sure I won’t take the kids to my sons dad ( I would not do this ) my sons dad requested his bail to be lifted with the terms ( only to see the kids if supervised by social work ) the social work told me they had declined this so when the PF called me I also declined this which I hope shows protective awareness and co operation,

My daughter has a different father who unfortunately was very abusive towards me, he doesn’t see my daughter as he didn’t respect my boundaries and I felt he was a risk to my daughter due to drug use and he also was verbally abusive to me in front of my daughter and he got a knife to me when my daughter was home, I split with him when my daughter was very young and never allowed him contacy unless it was supervised as he threatened to steal her, he never agreed to supervised contact and never seen her or contacted for her for a long time but because he had parental rights he was informed by the childrens tepkrted and causing a lot of problems so the reporter felt it was necessary to put an ICSO in place for my daughter to not have direct or indirect contact with her biological father which I was accepting off as this worried me, the social work are happy I won’t allow my daughter to be around him and I’m aware he needs a parenting assesement and DV programmes and for contact to be supervised, I have provided the SW evidence of the DV and have a seperate hearing to review the ISCO on the 14th and I have a grounds hearing on the 20th

Just not sure what comes next

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear worriedmumof2x

Thank you for your further post. I am glad to hear that your situation seems to be moving forward. You are now having unsupervised contact with your children which is positive.

Some of the legal language you use makes me think that you are in Scotland. Is that the case? If it is then I am sorry but we are unable to advise you. Family Rights Group’s remit and expertise is in advising families with children’s services involvement in England only.

If you are in Scotland then you may be able to get advice from the Scottish Child Law Centre.

If I have misunderstood and your children’s case is in court in England then please post back to let me know so that I can provide fuller advice.

I hope everything works out.

Best wishes

Suzie