Advice

[Amethyst]

My partner of 7 years was arrested in our family home on thur 20th April in relation to child images.
My world has been flipped upside down I have a 12 year old boy diagnosed autistic whom he is a step father too.
Only conditions of his bail is he is not to be alone with a child and due to my sons Autism we are still allowed to see him as part of the routine he obviously just can not spend the night.
Obviously we now have a social worker involved who I know will more than likely almost try to turn me against him.
He is residing at his parents address and we have met for lunch as a family group over the weekend.
Today is the professionals meeting at the school and at 1pm I've not heard anything.
I'm so scared that choosing to support my partner will give them more cause for concern and possibly take my son who is obviously 1000% my priority and I have said to him if I'm told supporting him would jeopardise him staying in my care I'd obviously walk away.
He has unfortuantly confessed to what he's been accused for and I have so many questions and concerns. I've not been able to reach anyone and didn't want calls etc recorded.
He (the partner) has yet to be interviewed that's tomorrow.
Will his bail conditions change?
Will or can he be charged then?

We have both said we will speak again on Wednesday and by then we should hopefully know a bit more.

Do I try and fight to stick by his side?
He has been very honest with me as hard as it was to hear.

My heads all over the place

I've read posts that some have not done prison time as a non religious person I'm actually praying for a miracle.

We are in *xxxxxxxxxxx*

Any advice on what we are looking at?

(*edited by Suzie for confidentiality)

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Amethyst

Thank you for your post. My name is Suzie, I am an online adviser for the Family Rights Group and will be responding to you today.

I am sorry to hear of your distress. It must be a very worrying and stressful time for you. You have lots of questions but are fearful of calling our advice line because you do not want your conversation to be recorded.

To clarify, the telephone advice line is a free, independent, and confidential advice service. Conversations are not recorded. There are two exceptions to confidentiality and I have added a link HERE to further information and guidance regarding this.

Your partner of seven years was arrested in relation to child sexual images. He admitted to the offence and a police investigation is ongoing. Bail conditions are in place. These conditions state that he cannot have unsupervised contact with a child or overnight staying contact at your home. You have a 12-year-old child who lives with you and is diagnosed with autistic spectrum disorder.

You have decided to remain in a relationship with your partner and given this you supervised contact between your son and partner. You are worried that by remaining in the relationship you may be jeopardising your son remaining in your care . You have informed your partner that should this be the case, you would prioritise your child over your partner.

You ask whether your partner’s bail conditions will change following his interview with the police. Your partner is on pre-charge police bail. I cannot speculate on the outcome of this. It will depend on several factors once the interview has taken place. I have added some information HERE that you may find helpful. It is information from the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) regarding Bail.

I have further added information and guidance HERE from the Lucy Faithful Foundation. They work with people who have been arrested, cautioned or convicted for internet offences involving indecent images of children or sexual communications with children, to help them stop their behaviour. Their Our Stop It Now! helpline is an anonymous and confidential service available to anyone with concerns about child sexual abuse, including:

• adults worried about the behaviour of other adults or children and young people

• those worried about their own sexual thoughts or behaviour towards children, including those with concerns about their online behaviour

• friends and relatives of people arrested for sexual offending, including internet offending

• any other adult with a concern about child sexual abuse - including survivors and professionals

This is their confidential helpline number: 0808 1000 900.

Children’s services are involved but you do not say in what capacity. I will assume there is a Section 47 assessment underway or that one has been completed. I have added further information and guidance HERE regarding this process.

Children’s services have a duty to ensure your child is kept safe from harm. They will need to be satisfied that you are able to prioritise your child’s needs above all others. That you understand risk and potential risks and are able to I safeguard them. I have added some information HERE regarding their powers regarding removal and the process they must follow.

I have added a link HERE to our ‘top tips’ when working with social workers. The document sets out information and guidance when working with social workers and what action you can take if you are not satisfied with the service you receive.

I hope you find the information provide helpful. Should you wish to speak to an adviser please call our free advice line on 0808 801 0366 (Mon to Fri 9.30a.m. – 3.00p.m) excluding bank holidays. We also have a webchat service you can access. It provides ‘live’ advice from an adviser (not a bot) and can help you to find information and advice on our website. Alternatively, you can of course post again on here.

Best wishes, Suzie