Child protection plan help

[HEITS24]

Good Evening

Sorry to message again

The meeting took place, and they have put my children on a child protection plan.

My partner did not have a very good past history as there where a few DV reported but he was not charged for any of them.

The decision was I'm neglecting my children as they think they are witnessing and hearing DV but they haven't at all and I've tried to explain this to them.

I understand they are looking out for my children as am I, but they have broken our family apart and the children are very upset and constantly asking for their dad and this is affecting them emotionally. Social services seem to be contradicting themselves as they put the child plan in place to protect them, but it's doing the complete opposite now.

His DVPO ends on the 1st September where the police have said he can come home but social services have said he can't come back if he does, they will take legal advice.

The social worked who is assigned to us has been very threatening and very rude towards me and my sister on quite a occasions now. I have complained to a few other social workers when they came to do their unannounced visits when the assigned social worker wasn't available. She new I had complained and confronted me in my own home when my little girl was a sleep in my arms. I told her several times that I don't wish to discuss this Infront of my children but she kept on at me infelt so intimidated I'm my own home and to this whilst I'd got my daughter in my arms is unacceptable.

She has been very rude to my family when she has spoken to them on the phone undermining them.

After the meeting where it was decided to put my children on a child protection plan, I still haven't been given any notes on what the plan in. I only have the paperwork from the section 47 which has a plan on which hasn't been discussed with me at all saying he can't come back to the family home if the kids are there. They mentioned in the meeting that my partner would need to do a course for DV for his past and that was it, nothing else at all, no mention of the plan in the paperwork which was never discussed with me.

I then had a phone call 2 days after the meeting from the assigned social worker. I explained to her I was at the beach with my children and it wasn't safe for me to talk as my little girl and I who's onlym2 where paddling in the sea. She kept going on at me despite me saying this asking what where my intentions and if i was letting my partner back in the family home. I've always said that we were going to be a family and work with social services as we have been after the DVPO finishes but she kept going on. I asked her to finish the call as it wasn't safe for me to talk and she then threatened me with taking the kids away if I got back with my partner or the only other option another adult would have to live with us for a year... it was ridiculous to suggest that as there would be overcrowding in a 3 bedroom house with 6 people and where would they sleep etc she said its that or the kods get taken away. I tried to finish the call and she demanded I go home or get someone to look after the kids so she could speak to me. Luckily my sister saw how upset I was as we were out as a family and she took the phone off me and explained to the Social worker not to talk to me the way she was and that we would be requesting a new social worker. She then continued to undermine my sister who said she won't be talking to you any more and will be contacting your manager.

Soon after the call I contacted the manager who acknowledged my issues and she said she would ring me next Thursday as she is on annual leave. This would be the day after my partner can legally come home and she didn't seem concerned.

I am totally confused at all of this. My partner poses no threat at all to myself or the children and we have been working with them every since the call was made regarding my little girl climbing out her cot. They even sung his praises and said how good he is with the children etc etc but agyer I blacked out and hurt myself they think he hurt me but he didn't which I've explained.

They also said when they where originally involved they did a police check and nothing untoward flagged up. We agreed to the child.in need plan as we have nothing to hide and worked with them continuously.

Its really taking its toll on me mentally and physically. I've lost over a stone in weight and its effecting my already poor health. I've also lost my job now as my partner looked after the children when I went to work. None of this has been taken into account all.

My partner is adamant he's coming home, but I'm so scared they will take my children away. He has also enrolled himself on a Domestic Violence course which had been asked off him off his own back.

We are doing everything we can but it doesn't seem good enough.

I just don't know what to do as if he comes home will they take the children away.

His past is his past and he should be given a chance of a new life.

Hoping you can help as I'm really struggling here to cope with all of this.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear HEITS24,

Thank you for your further post which updates your situation.

You say that although your partner’s DVPO ended on 1st September children’s services have told you that they don’t feel that it is safe for him to return home. From the information you have given it is unclear if children’s services will start the pre-proceedings process if you go against their advice (and he returns home). As it is now several days later things may have progressed further, but if you do receive a letter from children’s services inviting you to a pre-proceedings meeting (sometimes this is called a ‘PLO meeting’) then it is very important that you get a solicitor as soon as possible. You will be automatically entitled to legal aid at this point. You can ask children’s services for a list of solicitors in your area, or you can use the search function on the Law Society website.

I would suggest that you have a look on our website HERE and HERE for more information about the pre-proceedings process and care proceedings.

It is important that you fully understand the concerns that children’s services have about the children witnessing domestic violence in your home. In a previous post I suggested that you look on our website HERE for advice and guidance about children’s services and domestic violence; if you have not already done so then I would encourage you to read these pages. Although you say that your partner poses no risk to you or the children, in a previous post you described an incident in which he assaulted you and you have said that there have been several accusations against him in the past regarding domestic violence. This information suggests that he could pose a risk to you and the children and it is important that you acknowledge this so that you can work with children’s services to reduce any potential risk.

I am sorry to hear that you feel that the social worker has been rude and threatening towards you. You say that you have complained and that you spoke with the manager recently about this who agreed to contact you again to discuss things further. I hope that it has been helpful to speak with the manager and that things have moved on regarding this. However if you wish to take your complaint further then you can do so - HERE is a link to information and advice about making formal complaints.

It may also be helpful for you to read our guide to working with social workers which you can find HERE.

You say that you have not yet received a copy of the child protection plan. A core group meeting should have been held 10 working days after the child protection conference, and you should have been given a copy of the plan for this meeting. If you have not yet received this then I would suggest that you contact the manager to request this document.

I’m sorry to hear how difficult you are finding all this and how it is affecting your physical and mental health. Supportline offer a confidential emotional support helpline which you may find helpful or the Samaritans helpline is open all day, every day.

I hope that the above is of some help. Please post again if you have any further queries or you can call our free confidential helpline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm) to speak with one of our advisers.

Best wishes,
Suzie