Advice needed - risk assessment

[DalmationSpots]

Hi all,

First time posting. I have two children (M 9 and F 4) and split up with their Dad earlier this year.

I met my new partner and slowly introduced him to both children. He has met my family who get on exceptionally well with him, both children really like him and we have made plans (holidays) for the next year.

Due to an incident with my ex I rang the police. They came out, confirmed the incident met a threshold for conviction (malicious communication) however decided not to press charges and for him to get a warning. Police said because the kids were present they would be doing a referral to social services.

Social services contacted me, and at the end of the call asked me if I knew about my current partners conviction. I knew nothing and eventually they told me he had a historical child sex abuse conviction. I advised that I would be ending the relationship and they said they would be closing the referral.

I went to my partners to break up and he disclosed to me that he was 13, the girl was 10. He had undiagnosed autism, Asperger’s, adhd and severe depression. He was a very naive 13 year old. He plead guilty immediately and was given a hospital order with no restrictions. He was on the sex offenders register from 14-17.5. He was discharged from the hospital order just before his 18th birthday.

I requested a Sarah’s Law and the police confirmed everything my partner had told me was true and correct. He has had no reoffending or any contact with the police since 2006.

Social services are now doing a risk assessment. No contact between my partner and children until the risk assessment has been done. Childrens dad has branded partner a paedophile and is strongly objecting to any involvement. The girl has contacted me, said she fully supports my partner they were both kids and he shouldn’t be getting punished now.

Social services left paperwork behind which rated the preliminary risk as a 6.

Any advice or guidance on what to expect (realistically).

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear DalmationSpots

Welcome to the parents’ discussion board and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie and I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser. I am sorry to hear about the difficulties you and your family are experiencing.

You have separated from your children’s father. An incident which occurred with him resulted in a referral to children’s services. You explain that although the incident met a threshold for conviction the police are not pursuing a criminal case and gave your ex-partner a ‘warning.’

If you need any advice in relation to domestic violence please see this link to specialist domestic violence services. If you need any private law advice in relation to contact between your children and their father please see these sources of legal advice.

When children’s services became involved they notified you that your current partner had been convicted of a child sexual offence when he was also a child and that he had spent time on the sex offenders register and under a hospital order which, I understand, allowed him to receive treatment for his mental health needs. These processes ended before he was an adult. You don’t say what treatment or support your partner received while he was under these restrictions.

It is unfortunate that your partner did not tell you about this history when you began a relationship with him, in recognition that you have young children. I understand that it may be painful for him to discuss but it would have allowed you to get advice and to consider what you might need to do to make sure that your children were safeguarded. I think his lack of transparency to begin with may be seen as a potential risk factor.

Initially, you decided to end the relationship and children’s services were happy then to close the case. However, you have since changed your mind having heard your partner’s account of the situation. This has prompted children’s services to stay involved. They are asking you to ensure that your partner has no contact with your children while they undertake a risk assessment. This is standard practice. You are complying with children’s services’ recommendations but querying what you should expect.

You may find this information about assessments helpful.

In the situation you describe, children’s services are assessing what risk your partner may pose, considering the detail of the offence committed, what interventions he has had and his current situation. They are also assessing your insight into possible risk and your capacity to safeguard the children. You say that the victim has been in touch with you to say she supports your partner and he should not be ‘punished’ now. The purpose of the risk assessment is not to punish your partner but to ensure that your children are not put at any risk of harm.

Your partner may find the Unlock charity useful as they provide advice and information to people who have past convictions including those offences committed as minors.

You may both also find the Stop it Now website to be informative and Parents Protect too.

It is important that you continue to work with children’s services and ask that they keep you updated and are transparent with you. These tips on working with a social worker suggest how to do this.

There can be a number of different outcomes to risk assessments depending on the circumstances. It is not possible to predict what findings your social worker will make but they should be clear with you about any recommendations they make, why they are making them and any potential consequences of not agreeing to them.

Your children’s father may look into his options if you continue with a relationship, too, if he continues to have concerns about this. Child Law Advice or Rights of Women offer legal advice in these situations.

You may want to post again or call for advice once the assessment has been completed and you have received a copy. Our Freephone advice line number is 0808 8010366 and lines are open from 9.30 am to 3.00 pm Mon to Fri (except on bank holidays).

I hope this is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

[DalmationSpots]

I just wanted to post an update for anyone who like me will be reading various forums for any insight, hope or realistic expectation.

As previously stated my partner has a historical child sex abuse conviction from when he was 13, with a female under 13.

Social services came out and met me and my 2 DC. They then went and met my ex partner. They then went and visited my partner who had obtained a copy of his discharge papers and report. He was completely open and had to answer a lot of uncomfortable questions regarding what happened and had to describe it quite graphically. The social worker went to the school to discuss the children and spoke to both children whilst there.

Contact has been zero between partner and children during this period. Contact with social services had been extremely limited and for my first time dealing with them I found it very frustrating - I guess I expected them to be in contact a lot more but truth is they barely bothered me or the children except from one visit.

Deadline was mid October - on the day I received a call from the social worker to advise me that they had concluded the assessment and they had no worries with my partner spending time with my children - their only suggestions were not to leave them unsupervised which they’d recommend for any partner and for partner not to be around during bath time which again is what they’d recommend.

I expected a list of rules and struggled to adjust to the sudden right it’s ok now - but pleased with the results.