Need some advice please..

[Anxious]

Thank you bluepain for your response you have put my mind at ease. I just feel very vulnerable at the moment with these officials in my life as I've never had any one like them before involved and now I just feel like everyone is against me trying to find things to report about me even though there's nothing there. I also always have that fear of them telling lies or twisting the truth. I have two very healthy happy kids. They are hardly ever at the doctors as they rarely get ill so I don't know what they think I'm doing wrong as a mother I've never hurt my children I don't leave them with anyone and I don't drink do drugs or even smoke. I just feel like an easy target for them because I'm not confrontational I have a clean warm home and for them It must be an easy job coming here because I know for a fact that other people don't give it to them that easy and will be aggressive towards them. Maybe I should start being more assertive with them!

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Anxious

Your health visitor is a key member of the professional network, and you could use it to your benefit, the fact that she has made plans to visit you at your house as part of the current assessment of your children.

The visit will help her to gain a better picture of how you are managing. In addition, her views could help to decide (possibly in your favour) whether to offer your family support under a child in need plan. Instead, the alternative would be to recommend they support you under a child protection plan, which is probably your least favoured of the two options.

So try not to be too worried, but use the visit as an opportunity to listen to what they have to say, and for you to raise any concerns you may have. Be open to listening to the health visitor's point of view about your child's speech and language progress.

Ask if she there is any additional support you can offer your child at this time. Make it clear that you want to prioritise your children's needs, and that it is your intention to continue to work with professionals, whatever is decided by Children's Services.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes


Suzie

[Anxious]

Thanks Suzie for your reply. I have been cooperation with everyone involved and have done everything that has been asked of me and so has my partner. I have been told by my childrens speech and language therapist that the children are doing great and that y son especially has really improved and is being much more vocal. I hope the visit goes well as I have heard some negative things regarding health visitor I just hope they are here to help and not to pick fault

[Anxious]

So after finally getting into contact with the health visitor a home visit has been arranged for Thursday an hour after the social worker has been so that's not going to be a very fun day the health visitor seemed a bit shifty on the phone, when I asked her what the visit was regarding she went silent on the phone before saying ummm it's regarding social care involvement and that she has a duty of care to visit to see the children and to do a health review. She also wants to see my red book for the children. Does anyone know what health visitor visits entail? I've only ever had one in my house when kids were first born and also seen them at the normal baby clinics for general weight and immunisation appointments. I also want to know what they can and can't do as I don't want them to try push things too far as though they have loads of power an authority. I know my aunts midwife was very nosy looking in her cupboards and things so I would just like to know what my rights are against the health visitor if they do something i don't feel comfortable with. Are they allowed to undress my children and examine them? As they are not a doctor so I don't feel comfortable with this. Any advice would be good. I don't want her walking all over me when she comes.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Anxious

Please refer to my previous advice.

The multi agency assessment is based on statuory guidance, specifically Working Together Guidance (2013) and Framework for the Asessment of Children and Need and their Families.

Our advice sheets on family support and child protection provide further information about how social workers assess and establish what, if any family support needs they may have in relation to their children, and whether they need to take any protective action in relation to them.

Under normal circumstances, the health visitor would only visit you at home if she was carrying out a ten day birth visit and this may only take place if there is a specific concern following the birth. Otherwise, she would need your permission for this to take place, and they can only examine your child with your consent.

Finally, due to the limited resources in the health service, the health visitor would normally only visit you if your child was subject to a child protection plan.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes

Suzie

[Anxious]

They are not subject to any plan as of yet I think the assessments are still continuing. Tomorrow the social worker is coming out to tell us what parenting classes are available and what one we can attend. But as for the hv I don't really know what she will be doing.

[Anxious]

So the sw and hv came for their visits on Thursday and everything went well. The sw spoke to us about parenting classes which we will be starting up soon. She also gave us a revised contract with all the things we have to do and things we should not do regarding contact with other members of my partners family and agreements to take the children to health checkups. We will also be getting a family support worker coming to the home and a regular hv. The sw will visit every 20 working days and we will continue to take the children to their speech and language sessions. We are also having a meeting at the school next Friday which I am looking forward to because I have a lot of issues with the school and with the way they dealt with the situation. After explaining to my hv what the school did regarding calling the sw and being very two faced with me and telling me half truths about my children she was in agreement that they dealt with things badly. I have never been approached by the school regarding social workers involvement with the children and they don't even know my family properly there is no relationship between myself my partner and the school they tell us nothing! The hv told us she has no concerns with the children and was happy with the way they were with me and my partner. It's so nice to finally hear positive things about us. The sw and hv also met my mum as she is here on holidays which was a great help because it allowed them to see my mum is a great support to me and they also got some feedback from her on how she felt about the situation. So hopefully things will continue to go well as the sw has said the children are in need at the moment however if things escalated in any way then it would go to a cpp! I do not want that to happen! I just hope the ongoing police investigation comes to an end soon and we get a positive outcome. I am slightly worried that if my partner was to be charged would it change anything. Well I will keep my fingers crossed an carry on cooperating with all professionals and hope we can get out lives back to normal moving on from this horrible experience.

[Anxious]

Can someone please tell me what a family support worker does? Are they trained professionals? Because I have read some are volunteers

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Anxious,

Family Support workers are sometimes based in social worker teams but can also work for voluntary organisations like Surestart. Some will be paid others might be volunteers-for example, if they are training to be a social worker.

Their role is to provide support to families. This might be around different aspects of parenting (such as helping set boundaries, helping with disabled children, assisting parents to access support groups or community resources or providing emotional support). Often the support is time limited so I would grab this help with both hands!

Ask the social worker or family support worker what help s/he could offer you and your family. Ask for how long and how often s/he will be allocated to you. Think about what she could help you with.

Hopefully you will find him/her to be a very useful resource.

Best wishes,

Suzie

[Anxious]

That sounds good. Should be useful either way. Got a meeting with all the professionals on Friday at my daughters school so hopefully my voice will be heard as I have a lot of things that I need to get off my chest with the way the school has treated us.