Any advice, please

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A Worry
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2018 10:09 pm

Any advice, please

Post by A Worry » Mon Jan 14, 2019 12:20 pm

Our daughter (16) has told social services that she doesn't want to live at home any more. She says that the reason is that we make her do chores. We do ask her to sort the laundry occasionally, put the recycling in the bin and assist with washing up after meals. And a few other insignificant things, which to her we understand are not insignificant.

She refused to return home from school on her 16th Birthday, and was housed in sheltered accommodation, up until this we saw a typical teenager at home, we have another daughter now 23, so have seen this behaviour before. (Not the running away) our daughter was always at school and on time. After leaving, her attendance dropped off, the school refused to give us any information concerning our daughter, claiming that she had said that she didn't want us to be informed. Her behaviour spiral down, she took drugs, drank to the point of passing out and was taken to hospital because of a suspected reaction to something she had taken.

So it turns out that our daughter had been talking to the school, we had spoken to the school three months previously and said that our daughter was not showing any signs of concern at home, other than what you would expect. We had continued to do activities as a family without any real issues.

The situation came to a head we believe when a social worker meets with our daughter, then called us, to ask how she was at home, again we reiterated that at home she was fine.

This was the day that she refused to return home.
Social services have concluded that home is not an unsafe place and nether us as parents have done nothing other than what is considered as normal parenting. The school continues to treat us really poorly, our daughter claims that if she is made to return home she will take her own life. She is currently receiving treatment under section 2 of the health act. We only ever find out anything thing after its already happened.

To that end social services want us to allow her to be cared for under Section 20, our daughter has said that is what she wants. The only available place is about 25 miles away from home and school.

Any advice would be greatly received.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2828
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Any advice, please

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Jan 28, 2019 12:57 pm

Dear A Worry

Thank you for your post and welcome to the Board.

I am sorry to read that your daughter’s mental well-being has led to her being cared for under the Mental Health Act and that as a result of this Children’s Services are suggesting that you agree to Section 20 accommodation, Children Act 1989 for her when she leaves the hospital/care environment.

You say that your daughter agrees or has asked for the accommodation and because of her age Children Services will most likely agree with her decision and accommodate her as she requests, our advice sheet Children looked after by Children’s Services under a voluntary arrangement will give you more information.

Young Minds is a charity that may be able to advise you through their Parents Helpline.

Best wishes


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