ico granted now back in court 2 weeks later

Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Sep 23, 2017 4:40 pm

ico granted now back in court 2 weeks later

Postby A123 » Tue Jun 12, 2018 8:58 pm

the ICO was granted 2 weeks ago an the appointed gaurdian is one i had previously (placed my other child with someone who has had a family member around her kids before i was pregnant and the SW said that was fine) well she now wants a psychological assessment because i have traits of emotionally unstable personality disorder but from what i can gather from the 1st court hearing if i have that diagnosis then they will use that against me saying that personality is developed during childhood and can't be changed, my CPN has said there are loads of women with that diagnosis and don't have issues parenting, i have also been told i will be having another parenting assesssment completed by september, i believe the gaurdian will say no to my daughter coming home shes currently in foster care, im breast feeding her and im having constant battles over that because origanally i was told they would collect the milk on days i don't see her which is the weekend and one week day that has not happend the court support me breast feeding not sure how because they have not put anything in place to help the SW has given my solicitor a breast feeding diary and hes never seen one before (i have low supply but it could be an underlying medical issue).
i give the foster carer clothes, nappies, milk wet wipes everything for my daughter and we have a good relationship and i can attend all medical appointments with the carer as there is no issues surrounding my parenting just about me being able to safe gaurd my daughter, they are not asking me to do any parenting courses or anything i have said i am willing to work with services put in place as i have never had support before apart from my CPN ss has never offered me support so as far as im aware i have not been asked to complete anything or do anything apart from complete the freedom programme as didn't finish the last one due to pregnancy complications.
what exactly is a psycological assessment for a personality disorder? i have a psyciatric assessment this thursday to check i dont have post natal depression and because SS want a diagnosis they are not happy with the current one which is annoying my CPN because they cant diagnose something if i dont have it i just have traits.

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Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2018 9:14 pm

Re: ico granted now back in court 2 weeks later

Postby Dorothy » Fri Jun 15, 2018 5:16 pm

I am very sorry to hear about the situation you have found yourself in.

I believe that the professionals cannot use any diagnosis against you unless they can demonstrate that there is a direct impact of it on your child - any completed assessments will look how any of your emotional/mental health difficulties prevent you from meeting your child's needs.

If there are any concerns, they will also consider how these are managed - if any identified risk can be managed by a safety plan you put in place and the impact of your difficulties on the child is therefore minimised, their conclusion will be that the child can return to your care because there is no significant harm to the child.

Specifically, you have certain difficulties but you can recognise them and you can also recognise that they have a negative impact on your child. Example would be - you self-harm but can recognise that your child witnessing your self-harming would find it very distressing. So your safety plan to manage this could be

a) short-term plan: you calling your child's grandparents and asking them to look after the child every time when you self-harm. This way, any risk linked to you self-harming is managed.

b) long-term plan: you seek support for your self-harming via GP/self-groups etc

I would:
- be honest with myself and try to identify my difficulties and the impact of them on my child;
- do a search of all support available in my area and refer myself for this support - self-help groups, charities such as MIND, referrals via GP etc;
- think of which of my friends, family members etc could help me to minimise the impact of my difficulties on my child and how I could utilise their support - I would then approach them and make a specific plan which I would present to Social Care (you can do this formally through a Family Group Conference).

I would not wait for the assessments to be completed and actively look for support myself as soon as possible.

Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Sep 23, 2017 4:40 pm

Re: ico granted now back in court 2 weeks later

Postby A123 » Fri Jun 15, 2018 10:41 pm

I am working with mental health services and I was due to get discharged last year but because I got pregnant they wanted to keep an eye on me I haven't self harmed since January 2017 when I was living in a refuge an since then I have had my daughter permanently removed an suffered serious injuries from a car crash an my mental health has remained stable.
They are concerned about my relationship choices although I have been single since 2016 my daughter was a result of a one night stand but the appointed guardian is arguing I'm lying because it's not my usual behaviour other children i was in long term relationships, I left my last relationship to go in a women's refuge and got rehoused in a different area an then SS disclosed my address in court to my abusive ex partner, I have had the out of Hours SS randomly called 3 times a week which has now stopped as no evidence of a relationship and no one else here so the SW stopped it.
The psychological assessment date I was given in court I couldn't do as I had an appointment with my shoulder specialist to do told my solicitor as soon as we left the room he went to tell the guardian an her solicitor to which the guardian replied oh that's convenient so my solicitor asked if she would like a copy of my hospital letter to which she said no it's not necessary (I took a copy to my solicitor anyway) I do feel like she's made her mind up because she's not happy with anything I'm saying.
Do they do courses specifically for safe guarding children? Or who would I need to speak to to find out I am also going to look at self referring to the freedom program again as the woman who is meant to be doing it with me hasn't started it yet and it's part of the work for court.

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