Partner has old DV with previous partner

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Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2019 9:41 pm

Partner has old DV with previous partner

Post by AD1 » Fri May 17, 2019 6:20 pm

My partner of two years has previous violence and a DV on his record. We have been together for nearly two years and have a baby together but I also have 4 children from my previous partner. Whilst my partner was in jail for violence on another male he completed a course on violence.
In the two years we have been together there has been no DV and no controlling behaviors. SS got involved because his probation referred us which I do not disagree with.
We had an assessment done first and it came out no further action then I got my own place as I lived with my mom and my partner told his probation we wanted to move in together so she referred us again. SS complicated another assessment which had incorrect information on they added things and so we was put on a CIN.
I went to the CIN meeting and the teacher there brought up something my daughter had said a year ago about not seeing me for a few days due to me having to clear our old house out.
After this meeting I had to go for a meeting with the manager and my SW to be informed we was going to a CP conference. I asked why and was told that one of the SW said I did not comply which was not true. I had the assessment which the SW had said I engaged well.
I received my report for the conference and the SW had said that in the CIN meeting The teacher had said my daughter had not seen me for 4 weeks and they didn’t know where I was or when I returned. This was not said and lucky for me I recorded the meeting for my own use to because I get confused with what they say and when they go round in circles when I ask a question.
We are going to conference for risk of significant harm under the category of emotional abuse. Also because of this my job is at stake as I teach.
Is this a normal thing to say my children are at risk of significant harm if there has been no DV between us ever and how can a social worker make up a blatant lie? What can I do about that? She also said that she is concerned I will not safeguard my children because I quoted the human right law when asked about my relationship saying he may have made mistakes but is entitled to have a family life.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Re: Partner has old DV with previous partner

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jun 19, 2019 4:24 pm

Dear AD1

Welcome to the parents’ discussion board and thank you for posting.

I am sorry that due to pressure of work it has taken some time for you to receive a response.

From your post, children’s services have decided to initiate an initial child protection which you think is not right because nothing, in your view, has happened for your children to be at risk of significant harm.

Your partner, you say, have a history of violence as well as domestic violence (DV) in his previous relationship. This appears to be a concern for children’s services and they became involved again after the referral from probation when you both decided to move n together. It may be that because you were living separately children’s services may not have considered the risk as high for possible domestic issues arising which might put the children at risk of harm.

Children’s services, as a result of the change in circumstances, decided to do a new assessment and decided that a child in need plan would be appropriate to monitor the situation. You say that following a child in need meeting a decision was made that the child in need plan should be escalated to child protection, you mention that it was said by the social worker that you had not complied but you do not say what exactly caused the social worker to reach this conclusion.

I can understand your frustration that something was said that was not true and since you had a recording this could be shown to be the case. It is not clear, from your post, that the only reason for the decision to go to child protection is because of what a teacher repeated, and which happened a year before when I imagine this information would have been documented in the previous assessment.

If you believe children’s services have acted wrongly in their handling of the case you may wish to consider making a formal complaint. Please see our advice sheetChallenging decisions and making complaints. You may also find it helpful to read our advice sheet Child protection procedures

The social worker in saying there is concern about whether you can protect your children may be looking at how much you defend your current partner and his history. You are of course right that he has served time in prison and should be able to get on with his family life. Children’s services have a role in ensuring that children are safe in their homes. Has your partner done anything to address the domestic violence or his anger which might be responsible for his violence generally?

Unfortunately, where a person works with children or vulnerable adults and there is a child protection plan in place, children’s services would inform an employer. It will then depend on that employer’s policies how progress matters and what action they will take.

You may wish to speak to an adviser about your situation and, if so, please telephone our advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday.

I hope this helps

Best wishes


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