stop contact with my fiancee who's 6 month's pregnant

[W**123]

hi, im new to this so a dunno where to start really or if im in the right bit but, my fiance is 6 month's pregnant and in foster care she's 1 n half i'm 23 and we are having a little girl on 14 of june we love each other so much and we both want to be family so much .. but her social woker/foster parent have took all of her phone's and laptops and everything off her .. i've sent her phone up and they took that a wont give me it back.. im not aloud to go to the baby scan .. i wasn't rude or raise my voice and her social woker hanged up the phone one me .. i thought you can only stop contact for 7 day's then have to get court order no ? im so depressed it's killing me i have made a couple of mistakes witch im willing to open up about to get the right answer's please help me

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear W**123,

Welcome to the Parents forum.
I am sorry to hear about the difficulties that you currently experiencing with children services.

Children services seem to have concerns about how safe you are to your unborn baby as well as possibly to your fiancé (who is still a looked after child-until she is 18).
Do you have any idea what they might be worried about?

Assessment of you
If you want to be involved with your baby then it seems likely that children services will want to carry out an assessment of you.

As you can see, this involves finding out about how you might parent your baby, whether you need any extra help with this, whether anything might affect your parenting such as a health problem or drug or alcohol use. As a new dad, you may want to get as much help as you can.

The assessment would also looking at where you live-checking that your home is suitable for a baby and what family and friend support you have. Does your family know about your baby? Are they supportive? Could they offer you any help?

But it can feel as though you are under the microscope-a difficult place to be! I am glad that you have remained calm and that you have not been rude or raised your voice.

What you can do
I suggest you send an email to the social worker and send a copy to the team manager.
• Give them your name and contact details. (You could also give contact details of your family).
• Explain that you that are looking forward to being a father and want to be involved with your partner and your unborn baby.
• Say that you are puzzled that you have been stopped from seeing your partner.
• Confirm that you are willing to be cooperate with any assessment that children services wish to carry out.


I noticed that you are under 30. We have a young parent’s project and we might be able to provide limited extra support for you such as an email and a telephone call. If you might want this help, please complete our referral form .


Here are some FAQ’s for fathers .

If you have any questions or need further advice, please post again.

Best wishes,

Suzie