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Having Issues with Social Services

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2017 10:09 pm
by toronto1998

I have some growing concerns about the CS I am under in my county. My daughter (now 6) has disclosed that she was touched by her mum's boyfriend. The incident happened in August 2017.

The school was informed as well as CS back in September 2017. My daughter has written what he had done and a log has been kept upto date. 2 police forces are involved, 1 of them have No Further Action, but have put the file on the shelf and stated that due to her age it is a slow burner. Basically my daughter could disclose at anytime.

Her mum is in denial and claims nothing happened. There has been 3 months worth of meetings, and still no further forward.

Last Monday I had a visit from the local police, the boyfriend made a complaint against me for harrassment!! One was an email to his employer and a phone call made by me to his employer which i did do on the advice of CS if I had a serious concern. The local police didnt know of my allegation and that the file was sent. They were told and they said "Well thats put his complaint through the floor"

I have stated that her mums boyfriend is a safeguarding issue and mum is still allowed to see her daughter (4 months have now passed since last contact) as long as she is alone. CS have now said that they have no safeguarding issues, despite believing my daughter.

I have really squashed this as not to bore anyone.

Re: Having Issues with Social Services

Posted: Wed Dec 20, 2017 12:38 pm
by Suzie, FRG Adviser
Dear Toronto,

Welcome to the parents forum.

I am sorry to hear that your daughter may have been sexually abused by mum’s boyfriend. You are understandably concerned that she may still be at risk because mum is still in a relationship with him.

There was a joint investigation by the police and children services. The police did not have enough evidence to take a criminal case against mum’s boyfriend. This does not mean that it didn’t happen. To obtain a criminal conviction they would have to prove, beyond reasonable doubt, that the offence was committed. With a child witness and no forensic evidence this may have been difficult to do.

Children services assessment will look at the evidence from a different balance –on the balance of probabilities-so 51% she is at risk to 49% she isn’t. Children’s services assessment will have included assessing mum’s ability to protect your daughter from any safeguarding risks. Does she accept her partners could be dangerous and so not let him have any unsupervised contact with your daughter?
From what you say, this appears to be the case.

Is there any plan such as a child in need plan or child protection plan?
Children services would be expected to “test” mums ability by speaking to your daughter alone and checking whether her boyfriend is coming to the home, for example.

Children services should have also considered what support your daughter might need to understand what happened and to self- protect in the future. For more information about support available have a look at the Parents Protect website .

I hope this advice helps but if post back if you have any questions or you could call our advice line on 0808 801 0366.

Best wishes,


Re: Having Issues with Social Services

Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2017 10:49 pm
by toronto1998
Hi Suzy

Yes, my daughter is on Child in Need and has been since 4th October 2017. I have only just received a C & F Assessment. It has been twisted beyond belief.

All CS seem to be interested in is the emotional state of my daughter and my mental health!! I have never stopped mum seeing our daughter as long as she sees her without him, so far the contact hasn't happened. So I went to my GP (deals with Rape and abuse cases) and explained what had happened, and she stated that due to my daughter already writing and disclosing what had happened that she should not need to be videotaped. Also she has no worries about my mental health state.

[*]How would I go about contact for my daughter with mum without her boyfriend being there.
[*]Social services said they believed her then turned round and said they never said it .
[*]My daughter will not talk to anyone whom she cant trust about what has happened.
[*]She has said it to me (dad) what happen and as wrote it but this to social services isn’t good enough they want video evidence .
[*]My daughter has said she has been left alone with mums boyfriend while she went into a shop to get her presents, but mum is denying everything.
[*]My daughter wont talk much about mum .

All agencies are saying that I am safeguarding my daughter well and to keep it up.

Boyfriend has access to her mums 2 sons and also works with her mum in a residential home with vulnerable adults

End of last meeting CS are looking at escalating to next level whatever that is.

Re: Having Issues with Social Services

Posted: Mon Jan 08, 2018 12:59 pm
by Suzie, FRG Adviser
Dear Toronto1998,

Thank you for posting back.

I am sorry to hear that the written assessment contain errors. Have you addressed these with the social worker?
In answer to your question about contact between your daughter and her mum, I assume mum knows your position about contact-that you are happy, at this stage for her to have contact as long as her partner is not present.
If not you could clarify this with her.
If she disagrees, then it is up to her(not you) to take the private law court route-which first involves there being a mediation (MIAM) appointment to try and reach an agreement, (unless mediation is not suitable).
For more detailed advice about private family law, you could contact the Child Law Advice Line or Families need Fathers.

You say that all agencies state you are safeguarding your daughter. That is good to hear.
Even so, children services want to escalate your daughter’s case to the next level-which is child protection.
You could ask the social worker set out her reasons in writing so that you can understand why and try and address those reasons.

Reading between the lines, do they think you are not cooperating with their assessment because you are worried about a social workers speaking to your daughter? If so, please look at our FAQ that explains why social workers must see children alone.

The Child protection process is a compulsory process, because it only happens if children services have information which leads them to suspect a child has suffered or is at risk of suffering significant harm and they want to see what support a family needs to safeguard a child. If you did not cooperate with the process, there is the chance that children's services would escalate things towards court proceedings. So it is really important that you cooperate with them.
To understand more, have a look at our information about assessments which links off to child protection enquires.

I hope this advice helps but if you have any questions, please post back or you could call our free and confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366.

Best wishes,


Re: Having Issues with Social Services

Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2018 10:47 pm
by toronto1998
Hi Suzy

Thank you for the reply.

I am breaking this down into sections

Errors in assessment

Just been formed that the previous SW has left her post at the end of December, and a new SW has been appointed (8th Jan) and visited daughter in school, SW has admitted she has not read any paperwork. My daughter has told her that she does not want to see mums boyfriend if he is with her mum. Still awaiting call back from SW should have rang me back last week.

I have said that i am very disappointed in the assessment. SW worried about my mental health! this keeps coming up at meetings, so I went to my GP and she has no issues whatsoever. The GP is concerned that SW are not helping me or supporting me with safeguarding but wants daughter videotaped despite having written and disclosed allegation. The BF has not even been spoken to by Police.


Mum is fully aware and are social services that I have not stopped any contact between daughter and mum. It was working fine till April/May when BF started to become more involved and she never asked to collect her or me to drop off. However, after the allegations and due to safeguarding I have said the offer is there still but must be on her own, this was again mentioned by me at all meetings. Mum does not believe her own daughter. I even said that she could have her for tea (in front of SW) and she comments i have two other children to sort! I have made other days but she didnt know what she was doing...No contact by mum. Nothing over xmas at all.

Yes all agencies (police/doctors/school/social services) backing the safeguarding I have put in place. However, SW doesnt see mums BF as a risk!!!!

Don't think its going to get escalated, mum made a comment that daughter looked a tramp, then I get jumped on by SW hence possible escalation. I have always told SW that I am more than happy for them to come to my house. I don't have an issue with Social Services talking to my daughter, never have. I do believe the previous SW was twisting thing to suit my daughters mum.

the meetings are not going anywhere, going round in circles (contact) mum sits there and leaves smelling of roses and i get what feels like a kicking, despite doing exactly what agencies want.

SW say they cannot get involved in contact.

At what stage if there is a stage can Social Services turn round and advise mum ends all contact with bf, as there is evidence that our daughter has written about him touching her.

I understand that Social Services have a responsibility to safeguard and protect children who may be at risk of significant harm. So why haven't they said that he poses a risk to children. oh yes they both work with vulnerable adults as well, and he also has regular contact with my daughters mums 2 sons (they live with their dad).