Dear Tin10
Thank you for your post and welcome to the parents’ discussion board.
My name is Suzie, online adviser at Family Rights Group.
I am sorry that you are feeling so confused about you current circumstances following your husband’s prison sentence for sexual contact with a child. Whilst I understand that you want to return to your normal family live with your husband and children, you do need to consider the concerns that children’s services are likely to have about your husband, a registered sex offender. Children’s services are concerned about safeguarding your children because of what happened to children who were close to the family, their concerns is to ensure that the same thing is not likely to happen with your own children. This might be something that you have already considered and concluded that this is unlikely to happen but children’s services will be cautious about how much your husband has changed.
The children are currently on a child protection plan and it is really very important that you adhere to the plan, cooperate and fully engage with children’s services.
You can read our
advice sheet relating to child protection procedures for more detailed information.
From what you say, your husband has received counselling from your reverend and you believe this has helped your husband to change and live a better life after his release. Obviously, I do not know the expertise that the reverend has but I would suggest that you and your husband make contact with
Lucy Faithfull Foundation an organisation that works with sex offenders and their families. I think this is likely to help you both in respect of your husband’s offence and moving forward.
You are trying to protect your children by telling that their father is away to look after his mother. Children’s services will want the children to know what their father did as this may well be the way for them to learn how to keep themselves safe. It might be helpful if you look at information about keeping your child safe. Please see the NSPCC
website for more information on this topic.
Children’s services do not have a legal right to give the information to your children if you object but they may consider it a negative on your part and see it as you not being a protective parent. You are of course within your rights to ask the social worker to explain how he or she intends to share the information with the children and what support will be offered to you to respond to any questions the children may have after she has spoken to them.
If children’s services have been working with you and your husband, I think this is on the basis of the fact that he crime he committed with a view to assessing the possible risk he poses if he were to live in the home. I cannot give you a time limit but it will depend on how you and your husband work with children’s services. The main thing children’s services will want to know is that you are fully aware of the risks involved and able to protect your children. You can support your husband as much as you can but your children’s needs should be your first consideration and that is the expectation children's services has in relation to safeguarding children.
I suggest you ask the social worker to explain how long a risk assessment of your husband will take and, if has not already started, when it will start and the timescale for its completion.
At present you are seeing your husband at the probation hostel and I assume this is because the child protection plan provides for this to happen away from the children. Are the children having supervised contact with their father? If not, ask the social worker when this can happen especially if the children are being adversely affected by not seeing him.
Should you wish to speak to an adviser in more detail, please telephone our free confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday (except Bank Holidays).
I hope you find this helpful.
Best wishes
Suzie