Dad In Despair

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Dadindespair
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Feb 13, 2019 11:10 am

Dad In Despair

Post by Dadindespair » Wed Feb 13, 2019 11:49 am

Hi

I am really looking for some advice here

I am a Dad of 2 children

I’ve been split up with their mother for over 2 ½ years. I’ve been with my new partner for 2 years.

So 4 weeks ago my ex wife stopped me from having contact with my children – reported me to social services for abuse on my daughter which is absolute lies.

I broke down at the police station when I heard the allegations along with my Father, I’ve been nothing but a good Dad to my 2 children.

I had them 2 nights one week and 3 nights the next and then alternate. My ex wife kicked off because she said I don’t have my children on weekends when I work (Taxi driver)

I used to pay her £260 a month for the children but she always always complained that this wasn’t enough – she works 2 days a week and both children are now in full time schooling and have been for 2 years.

I contacted CMS who advised because of what I earn and the number of days I have the children I only need to pay £16 a week. Obviously she wasn’t happy.

Subsequently we have had issues about her getting the children into school on time – I’m talking 3 to 4 times a week late – up to half an hour late.

Last straw was mum was meant to pick the children up from school and wasn’t contactable and was over half and hour late for them in which I was called and went straight away. At this point I was told to contact social services to raise my concerns.

Now this has all come out on the back of me contacting social services about the welfare of my children

I 100% know this allegation has come from their mother – she is emotionally abusing the children – she has secrets with a 4/5 year old that Daddy cant know about? Will this ever come out that she is putting things in the children’s head?

Police have dropped their investigated and my child had an ABE interview in which she didn’t say anything. Social services are promoting supervised contact but their mother is saying no (she knows this is the only way she can hurt me now)

Social services have now told me they have 45 days to carry out their investigation in which I hope they get to the bottom of this but what do I do in the meantime – I am seeing a solicitor tomorrow but I am desperate to see my children

Please please help me

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2632
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Dad In Despair

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Feb 20, 2019 3:38 pm

Dear Dadindespair

Welcome to the Board.

I am sorry to hear that there was an allegation about you regarding the care of your children which you believe emanated from your ex-wife and her ‘coaching’ them. Children Services will investigate the matter and do have 45 working days to carry out their investigation. Working Together to Safeguard Children 2018 can tell you more about the process, do start reading from page 25.

You have said that you will be visiting a solicitor, she/he may advise you about making formal arrangements for your children here is our advice sheet about DIY Child Arrangements Orders: information for family and friends carers, it is written for carers but applies to parents too. You may also find suggestions in this booklet created by a charity called Advice Now.

I hope you find this information helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

Dadindespair
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Feb 13, 2019 11:10 am

Re: Dad In Despair

Post by Dadindespair » Sat Feb 23, 2019 8:31 am

Ok, so here goes

I’ve now got my first hearing at the beginning of April

When filling in the forms I didn’t request an interim court order to see my children, can I request one on the day of the first hearing? I didn’t know I had to put it in writing or not

Please advise I’m panicking, if you have to request it in writing can I send a letter asking for this?

Many thanks

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2632
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Dad In Despair

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Mar 06, 2019 2:42 pm

Dear Dadindespair

Thank you for your further post.

You say you did not complete a request for interim court order to see your children. It is not detrimental if you did not do this as the judge can, if it considered appropriate make an interim order for contact to take place. If this is the first hearing, it is unlikely that an interim order would be made straight away if the children’s mother was not agreeable.

In your previous post you said you were going to meet with a solicitor. I suggest you discuss our concerns with the solicitor. Please also read the information that was sent in the response to your post.

If you do not in fact have a solicitor, you can telephone this organisation, Child Law Advice on 0300 330 5480, for advice about the application you have made to the court in what are now private law court proceedings.

I hope this is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

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