Dear D….D
Welcome to the Parents’ Discussion Forum.
My name is Suzie, online adviser at Family Rights Group.
I am really very sorry that you are feeling so distressed and upset that your child has been placed in the care of your sister under a special guardianship order.
In your post you say that you agreed to your child going to your sister from birth. Is it the case the children services were involved with you prior to the birth and your sister having the baby placed with her was part of a pre-birth plan? If it was considered that you would not be able to care for your baby immediately then this would normally be a way to ensure that the baby would be with family rather than stranger foster carers.
It is not clear from your post but I assume that children services issued care proceedings and, as part of that process, your sister was assessed for a special guardianship order. The position is that children services in care proceedings, are required to carry out assessments of a child’s parent(s); other family members who have put themselves forward and to consider whether the child should be adopted or remain in long term foster care. In respect of very young children the plan is often for the child to be adopted unless there is a positive assessment of a family member or friend.
The judge makes the final decision about what is best for the child and the child’s welfare has to be the court’s paramount consideration. I appreciate that you say you are now well enough to have your son in your care. However, at the time the case was at court, the evidence from assessments of you may not have shown that you would not be well enough within your baby’s timescale. Your mental ill health is not a reason in itself for you not to have your child in your care but if it impacts on your ability to safely care then this will normally be taken into account when making decisions about her future. What did your psychiatric assessment say about your ability to look after your child.
I am sorry that you feel so strongly that your sister rather than supporting you was against you. It is very hard to lose care of your child but it might help if you consider that the alternative to your sister having a special guardianship order (which means your child remains in the family), might have been adoption. Adoption would mean that you no longer any legal right to your child as he would be the child of the adopters.
Whilst you feel let down by your sister, it might help to see if you can mend bridges with her as this is likely to help in the future. If the relationship between you is hostile, then there will be concern about the level of contact you have with your son. It may be that at the moment the situation is such that the belief is that you do not support the placement so more contact is not in your child’s interest. Contact is for the benefit of the child. I have included a copy of our
advice sheet about special guardianship for birth parents.
As far as your solicitor is concerned, when representing you in your case, they work on your behalf on the basis of the instructions you give and advise you according to the evidence presented to the court.
It appears from your post that you were having supervised contact with your son. Now that there is a special guardianship order, your sister has parental responsibility for your son and can make decisions about contact. You continue to have parental responsibility but she can exercise hers over and above yours.
As a special guardianship order has been made in your sister’s favour now this means that the case has concluded. Your legal team would have advised you whether there were grounds for an appeal at the time. Whilst you might disagree with the court’s decision, the important thing for you now is to try and have good contact with your son, so if you are able to work with your sister this would be best for him.
Now that there is a special guardianship order, the only way to have your child in your care, would be for you to apply to the court to discharge the order. You would need permission from the court to do so. To make such an application you would have to show that the concerns that led to the court reaching its decision no longer exist and there has been significant changes. At the same time, the court will consider that your son is settled and may not consider it in his interests to change the status quo since this is the home he has had since birth. Making an application now might not give you the desired outcome.
You may wish to obtain your file from children services and a copy of our advice sheet regarding this is
here for your information. Also, if you feel that children services acted inappropriately in your case then you can consider making a formal complaint and a copy of our
advice sheet is attached.
Children services is able to provide help and support to a special guardian in respect of making contact arrangements, so you could ask for them to help arrange mediation for you and your sister to see if you can both reach an amicable arrangement for the benefit of your son. I would urge you to consider this course to see if things can be resolved.
I hope you will find this helpful. However, if you wish to speak to an adviser please telephone our free advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m. Monday to Friday.
Best wishes
Suzie