Help, what steps to take, want my boy home

[tempusername]

I have a baby boy of 16mnths, he is my world. Only this is where the devistation starts. I was exhausted caring and keeping my boy in high spirits. That coupled with the ex causing me emotional stress, endevoured me into quite a severe mental breakdown and i was incapacitated in hospital for an epsiode of phycosis. In my absence he has represented himself in court without my representation and an order was made for my child of sixteen month to reside with the applicant FATHER, this all seems very unfair to me and my child. He has been taken from his family home. My parents had ward of court, by verbalisation, pen and paper (in which i have since learnt was a waste of time drafting up). My child was to reside with him per social service arrangement and recommendation.

Now i am formally discharged it was said that my child was to reside back in his family home, our home. Only this isn't the case and the hearing has gone from a family preceedings court to a county court, and i find it overhelming to deal with.

I have a solicitor who has filed a intrem residence order, only with the back log in the court i'm looking at 10days until it's even picked up. I am at my wits end with the phone calls the letters the emails the mess social services have made that i cant see the woods for the trees.

The current position is that i only get to see my boy on a thursday from 12-6, and a saturday from 11:00 till sunday at 5 o clock. He cries everytime he goes and he loves his mam dearly, i cant sit and wait. Does anyone have any ideas, i have a meeting with a duty social worker on thursday, how is my time well spent with them, only i'm in need of any advice to reunite him with his mother full time. There is no concerns with myself, yet there is with the applicant i don't understand whats going on;

what steps to take

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear XXX,

I am sorry to hear about the very difficult time you have had recently. I understand that you spent a period of time in hospital and you made plans for your parents to care for your son.

However, your exe then sought a residence order from the family court-which was granted-I think for an interim (or limited period),the plan being for your son to return to you. You are having regular contact with your son-every weekend and Thursday afternoon.

As Mum you will have parental responsibility . Your exe will also have parental responsibility which is given in a residence order. (He may also have it is he was married to you or if he signed your son’s birth certificate.)
Unfortunately, I am not in a position to give advice about private law proceedings. Instead, you could contact the childrens legal centre. You should also discuss the social worker meeting with your solicitor. She will be able to identify what issues may remain and whether there should be a gradual return of your son to you.
You also mentioned that your exe had been putting a lot of emotional stress on you. If you think that he may have been domestically abusive to you, you should think about seeking advice and support from
womens aid
The social worker may want information about your current mental health, whether you have recovered and whether you may have a relapse. If there is a chance, how will this be planned for your son? If you have a CPN, can they provide this information to the social worker?

It is good that you have such good family support-your parents had been able to step in to care for your son. You could remind the social worker about this. Your parents could be seen as protective, in that they could urge you to seek medical help if you should relapse in the future.
I hope these points’ help. But please post back or call our advice line on 0808 801 0366 if you want to discuss further.

Best wishes,
Suzie

Edited by Suzie to remove names