Please help do we contact social

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Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2018 4:29 pm

Please help do we contact social

Post by Lillady12 » Thu Aug 02, 2018 4:03 pm

I know many people dont always like to hear of social services being involved. But right now we are in bits.
My step childs mum and partner had them involved for over a year. They increased to child protection and then shut case end of last year. However since then the care has dropped AGAIN. The house is awfull I am not talking general mess im talking food every where rubbish and more.
The domestic violence has increased between tue couple apprently he is no longer there now but its not the only time its happend police were called last time but i dont believe so this time. They steal from stores which the child is now doing. The child having nightmares and says the most disturbing things. Wen social were involved before the mother stopped contact . We dont want this to happen again as we are extremely worried if we call social services will they do anything ?

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Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2018 5:08 pm

Re: Please help do we contact social

Post by Kami2018 » Thu Aug 02, 2018 10:04 pm

Do not hesitate and phone them them poor children

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Please help do we contact social

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Aug 08, 2018 12:49 pm

Dear Lillady12,

Welcome to the Parents Forum.
I am sorry for the delay in responding to you as this is urgent.
I am sorry to hear that things have deteriorated again for your step child. It must be so worrying for you. You must be worried about your step child’s safety and wellbeing.

She had been on a child protection plan due to abuse she might suffer from the domestic violence and neglect. After mum's partner moved out of the family home children’s services closed their case.
However, things have deteriorated. There have been further incidents of domestic violence and the home conditions sound worrying. Not only that, your stepchild is being taught to steal from shops and she reports having nightmares and says disturbing things.

You are worried about contact being stopped if you report what you know to children services and that they may do nothing anyway.

Because the police were called after a further domestic violence incident, they should have made a further referral to children services. But the police may not know the full picture.

As your step child has told you information, then she may be asking for help from a protective adult. She is not at school at the moment so will be exposed to possible neglect and abuse more of the time.

Mum may feel unable to ask for help herself. She might be worried about a further intervention by children services or by being hurt further by the perpetrator.
Here are FAQ’s to deal with this issue .
Could you encourage her to speak to a domestic abuse organisation for support? An advocate could help her talk to children services. Or you or mum could discuss things further with the 24 hour domestic violence helpline on 0808 2000 247.
Here is are some of the support that mum could get- Support around domestic violence.

If you did not report your concerns, then you may be seen as failing to protect your step child which could have implications for your future contact.

From what you have said in your post, the situation is very worrying for your step daughter and I think you should report your concerns.

There are a number of ways to discuss/ report your concerns.

1) If you felt unable to contact children services you could contact the NSPCC or call their 24 hour helpline 0808 800 5000 and discuss your worries with them.

2) If you contact children services you can either remain anonymous by nor giving your details over the phone or website. Or you could ask that your details are not passed on to mum and this must be respected. Otherwise people (like you) will not want to report children being abused for fear of reprisals.

3) Or you could contact other professionals such as the police or GP about your worries and they would make the decision about referring to children services.
I wonder whether your step daughter received any support/ therapy for any trauma she may have suffered. Children services should consider what support she might need.

I hope this helps but if you need further advice please post again or call our advice line on 0808 801 0366.

Best wishes,


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