Dad still abusing but nobody will investigate
Posted: Sat Jul 16, 2016 9:05 am
Hi
I'm in an awful situation via the family courts, a bent solicitor and everybody brain washed by dad/dv perpetrator.
I'm sure you've heard of this before. I've spoke to so many people it's unbelievable, disgusting. So so wrong
There was an 18 mm thick contact court case. Court said dad was a risk to child also, as has been violent to child's mum. So welfare checklist . Wasn't put on dvpp program, or anger man agent course and one 4 week parent course which was based on behaviour with child that you lived with. Totally irrelevant to dad's situation. He has never parented our child. His parents have done everything for him. Now his gf does it as well. Setting up his bath, reading to him in bed. She lives away. Bur comes up at dads fortnightly most times when my son there. But nobody questions it professionally. There needs to be a thorough parent assesment/supervision done. Becuse his long distance girlfriend and his elderly parents in their 70s cannot be relied upon all the time. All four failed ro tKe my son to the drs or get ointment to help my son being in so much pain wirh an infectiom caused by their lack of care/parenting or rung me
.Nobody is taking me seriously. I'm under the telescope in stead because of something my son said. "Mummy said that she doesn't like me sleeping over at daddy's because he might drink too much too much and not wake up in the morning!". Nothing else has ever been said. Except my son saying he saw his dad with a wine glass with brown liquid in. He showed me at home what the glass looked like. A wine glass. There is a court condition he can't drink at all. Due to his very elevated hair strand test in the past.
The social worker won't do unplanned visits. I had to do a 3 stage complaint because she won't do a thing to assess if my son is at risk in his care or not. Despite my reports to police recently that his dad isn't physically caring for him at all. I had to take him to the Dr's with a bum infection after 3 days he had to use steroid! Cream for, in dad's care. He doesn't supervise or guide him to wash himself or give him soap or toothpaste sometimes and doesn't feed him enough. My son is always coming home starving. Even after just a day with him. Stinking of poo sometimes, his breath really bad etc.
Because I had to change schools when we had to move to a cheaper, smaller house and social said case closed still despite the report to the police, they sid was a Parenting issue"!
. It was none of their business where we lived anymore. They didnt need ro know.
My son is quiet and can be over emotional in new school so his teacher reported me to the social when she doesn't know me or him. And his dad reported 3 times in one month th when there has never been concerns about me in the 6 years I have cared for him on my own. For a period with a long term partner.
. I received a letter saying they were doing a s47 and putting.my child on child protection. As they hadn't been able to have contact with me. I am out all day most days until son finishs school. If they were so desperate they would have found me in on a Monday to Friday 3.45 pm or anytime after. They didn't have my new phone number only number my son's dad gave her, which is only in use during weekend contact.
There is no evidence that I have a serious mental health problem and it's affecting my son at all. But I was made to accept that my anxiety is affecting my son when nobody knows for sure
. Dad is causing a lot of anxiety about contact to my son as well as myself. Causing fall outs. Issues that shouldn't be issues. The main ones being his controlling behaviour towards my son. Stopping him have a social life. Going to youth club and seeing his cousins during his contact time when it is takes only an hour to two out of it. My son was so upset the last time. He burst into tears when his dad and parents went in the car, because his dad was 45 minutes late returning him to me. So he missed seeing his cousins . They don't live in our town. So have to go back home for school the next day. As it is a sunday fortnightly only when he can see them. My son even talked about it the following morning. It is so wrong.
I told the social worker Thursday when she came to see my son for creative therapy that he refused to do. Yesterday there was a child in need.meeting at the school but the worker was 20 min late and wouldn't allow me to time to discuss the club cancellations. She said that we should ask my son if he wants to go to club first. When obviously as a mum I do that automatically. He used to be shy about going. But now he said hes.made friends. I met one the other day. He ponited out and spoke to.
I can't get my voice heard.
I proved at the conference that dad is a liar. As the chair questioned him about evidence of my apparent bad mental health. And it was clear to everyone by his answers that he is lying. Nobody said anything. The same yesterday. I managed to turn it around to child in need still. But am still not getting anywhere as I'm having to do everything. Prove my mental health is okay. Go to more counselling and pretend I don't think dad is a risk when my family and friends think he is. Not just me who has experienced horrendous things from him.
In the past he neglected my son. He left my son alone at 2 in his home at night about for about an hour. I'd tang. No answer. Discovered he was at his parents home. I was too scared to report it again because it was 3 people against me. His dad had already lied for him before. They know we my son was alone . Said it was nothing to do with them though. My friend heard the whole conversation. He Left him alone in his car twice. Burnt his legs in a bathotel. Sitting there, while it was happening, with me running as fast as I could up the stairs to save him.
I have done nothing to put my child at risk physically. But I'm the one being questioned. I had to take my son away from his dad when he was only a baby because his dad forced him to witness the violence he bestowed upon me and slamming doors, making me scream/cry, trying to push me out the house. Leaving our son unattended. He locked us out the house one night even. And I found bottles and cans hidden of alcohol. He couldn't even go for an hour without a drink when watching him alone or with his parents.
The police don't even believe me simply because when I reported the historical neglect and my abuse the family contact case hadn't quite finished. And they presumed I was reporting stuff so the order would prevent contact. I have never said to anyone that I think there should be no contact at all of any time
Please can you help. My son is getting hurt emotionally now. Not just myself. And dad is putting the phone on speaker phone when I ring . Again
It's awful for him
I'm in an awful situation via the family courts, a bent solicitor and everybody brain washed by dad/dv perpetrator.
I'm sure you've heard of this before. I've spoke to so many people it's unbelievable, disgusting. So so wrong
There was an 18 mm thick contact court case. Court said dad was a risk to child also, as has been violent to child's mum. So welfare checklist . Wasn't put on dvpp program, or anger man agent course and one 4 week parent course which was based on behaviour with child that you lived with. Totally irrelevant to dad's situation. He has never parented our child. His parents have done everything for him. Now his gf does it as well. Setting up his bath, reading to him in bed. She lives away. Bur comes up at dads fortnightly most times when my son there. But nobody questions it professionally. There needs to be a thorough parent assesment/supervision done. Becuse his long distance girlfriend and his elderly parents in their 70s cannot be relied upon all the time. All four failed ro tKe my son to the drs or get ointment to help my son being in so much pain wirh an infectiom caused by their lack of care/parenting or rung me
.Nobody is taking me seriously. I'm under the telescope in stead because of something my son said. "Mummy said that she doesn't like me sleeping over at daddy's because he might drink too much too much and not wake up in the morning!". Nothing else has ever been said. Except my son saying he saw his dad with a wine glass with brown liquid in. He showed me at home what the glass looked like. A wine glass. There is a court condition he can't drink at all. Due to his very elevated hair strand test in the past.
The social worker won't do unplanned visits. I had to do a 3 stage complaint because she won't do a thing to assess if my son is at risk in his care or not. Despite my reports to police recently that his dad isn't physically caring for him at all. I had to take him to the Dr's with a bum infection after 3 days he had to use steroid! Cream for, in dad's care. He doesn't supervise or guide him to wash himself or give him soap or toothpaste sometimes and doesn't feed him enough. My son is always coming home starving. Even after just a day with him. Stinking of poo sometimes, his breath really bad etc.
Because I had to change schools when we had to move to a cheaper, smaller house and social said case closed still despite the report to the police, they sid was a Parenting issue"!
. It was none of their business where we lived anymore. They didnt need ro know.
My son is quiet and can be over emotional in new school so his teacher reported me to the social when she doesn't know me or him. And his dad reported 3 times in one month th when there has never been concerns about me in the 6 years I have cared for him on my own. For a period with a long term partner.
. I received a letter saying they were doing a s47 and putting.my child on child protection. As they hadn't been able to have contact with me. I am out all day most days until son finishs school. If they were so desperate they would have found me in on a Monday to Friday 3.45 pm or anytime after. They didn't have my new phone number only number my son's dad gave her, which is only in use during weekend contact.
There is no evidence that I have a serious mental health problem and it's affecting my son at all. But I was made to accept that my anxiety is affecting my son when nobody knows for sure
. Dad is causing a lot of anxiety about contact to my son as well as myself. Causing fall outs. Issues that shouldn't be issues. The main ones being his controlling behaviour towards my son. Stopping him have a social life. Going to youth club and seeing his cousins during his contact time when it is takes only an hour to two out of it. My son was so upset the last time. He burst into tears when his dad and parents went in the car, because his dad was 45 minutes late returning him to me. So he missed seeing his cousins . They don't live in our town. So have to go back home for school the next day. As it is a sunday fortnightly only when he can see them. My son even talked about it the following morning. It is so wrong.
I told the social worker Thursday when she came to see my son for creative therapy that he refused to do. Yesterday there was a child in need.meeting at the school but the worker was 20 min late and wouldn't allow me to time to discuss the club cancellations. She said that we should ask my son if he wants to go to club first. When obviously as a mum I do that automatically. He used to be shy about going. But now he said hes.made friends. I met one the other day. He ponited out and spoke to.
I can't get my voice heard.
I proved at the conference that dad is a liar. As the chair questioned him about evidence of my apparent bad mental health. And it was clear to everyone by his answers that he is lying. Nobody said anything. The same yesterday. I managed to turn it around to child in need still. But am still not getting anywhere as I'm having to do everything. Prove my mental health is okay. Go to more counselling and pretend I don't think dad is a risk when my family and friends think he is. Not just me who has experienced horrendous things from him.
In the past he neglected my son. He left my son alone at 2 in his home at night about for about an hour. I'd tang. No answer. Discovered he was at his parents home. I was too scared to report it again because it was 3 people against me. His dad had already lied for him before. They know we my son was alone . Said it was nothing to do with them though. My friend heard the whole conversation. He Left him alone in his car twice. Burnt his legs in a bathotel. Sitting there, while it was happening, with me running as fast as I could up the stairs to save him.
I have done nothing to put my child at risk physically. But I'm the one being questioned. I had to take my son away from his dad when he was only a baby because his dad forced him to witness the violence he bestowed upon me and slamming doors, making me scream/cry, trying to push me out the house. Leaving our son unattended. He locked us out the house one night even. And I found bottles and cans hidden of alcohol. He couldn't even go for an hour without a drink when watching him alone or with his parents.
The police don't even believe me simply because when I reported the historical neglect and my abuse the family contact case hadn't quite finished. And they presumed I was reporting stuff so the order would prevent contact. I have never said to anyone that I think there should be no contact at all of any time
Please can you help. My son is getting hurt emotionally now. Not just myself. And dad is putting the phone on speaker phone when I ring . Again
It's awful for him