Discharging an sgo

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Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2018 2:19 am

Discharging an sgo

Postby Dee1234 » Thu Sep 20, 2018 12:46 am

:) im due in court to discharge my sister's SGO on my son who is 7. My solicitor says im the best case shes ever had. I was very glad to hear this but im still concerned. I was in a short (8months)
Dv relationship and due to all the unforseen stress at the time i slipped up majorly, i had taken drugs 3 times. I was honest about this (but this went really against me) since then i had my ex arrested and hes in jail for 8 years. My son said my DV ex had hit him. I was distraught and social services accused me of shocking things with no evidence to prove it. At first it was a family arrangement order with my mum then at court my sister who lived with her applied for sgo behind everyone's back and on the court day she was granted it. This came as a total shock to me as i told the court it wasnt safe for my son to return home at that time because of the severity of the situation with the ex.(this decision destroyed me but i new it was the right one) since then ive totally changed my life. I moved district, passed my test and brought a nice new car, and done nearly 30 self help and dv courses to ensure i never end up in the situation again. I absolutely love my son so much i cant put into words. The problem is my sister wants nothing to do with me she blanks anyway of me contacting at all. She has a grievance against me personally as she believes all the false allegations but she refuses to look at all the evidence i have. She makes my son not talk about contact or me at her house and tells him off for confiding in me. This really upsets my son as our bond is so strong we used to see each other 3 days a week when social wer involved. When they signed us off and this meant i could have unsupervised contact but my sister had never allowed this.once signed off my sister changed contact to every 2 weeks f 3 hours then 4 months ago changed it again to once a month for 5 hours. Because my sister making contact uncomfortable and she upset my son on many occasions (all was reported to social but no help). I then arranged to have supervised contact by a contact centre in the community so my son and i could have healthy happy and safe environment. I also asked for minutes for court. Ive had fantastic reviews. I dont really know what happens in court or how long it takes from discharging sgo to him being able to return home. Its been nearly 3 years now i wanted to make sure my mental health was stabilised And i wanted to makesure i never relapsed bk to drugs to cope again (i never took them when my son was there but social never believed me and i had learnt all i possibly could in every area of my life to ensure i could make all changes needed and maintain them for a long period of time so my son was safe and happy and protected. I felt i had alot to prove to myself to feel worthy of being his full time mum again. Ive now done all this and much much more. Any advice on my situation and questions i would greatly be appreciated.
Many thanks for reading my essay

Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2018 2:19 am

Re: Discharging an sgo

Postby Dee1234 » Thu Sep 20, 2018 1:12 am

To let you kno my sister whom has sgo has ss involved now as she physically attacked my other sister infront of the children and she also forces my son to be vegan as she is a strict vegan, my son is very unhappy about this. Im very concerned about my sons mental health. He has been displaying behaviours towards my sister since she moved out my mums house in dec so thats 9 months ago. In the first 3 months she moved house twice and changed his school. All this coupled with not being allowed to talk about the most important person in his life his mummy.Ive never missed a contact in 3 years all my son wants is to come home. Ive had to report my sister on many occasions and ss refused to help for the fist 2.5 years as my sister wasnt physically beating him up. But since she attacked my other sister they are back involved after me reporting what happened. yet again I feel helpless to protect my son. When i called bk for an update and to confirm my son was safe they (ss) refused to answer my questions without my sisters permission, which i kno she wont give. Then they said if im that worried to call the police but the problem is that my sister (sgo) refuses to give me her address since she moved out my mums so i dont even kno wer he is or wer to send police if needed. Any advice is welcomed
Thank you for reading

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Discharging an sgo

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Sep 26, 2018 12:05 pm

Dear Dee1234

Welcome to the parents’ discussion board and thank you for posting.

My name is Suzie, online adviser, at Family Rights Group.

I see from your post that you have already make an application to the court to discharge the special guardianship order which was made in your sister’s favour. Your solicitor has informed you that you have a good case and he or she has all the information relating to your case so I am not sure I will be able to add more to that advice.

You say that your sister is now being investigated by children’s services following an incident between her and another sister which was witnessed by children. Children’s services are likely to see this as a safeguarding issue and, since you share parental responsibility you should be kept informed of meetings and any action they consider necessary in the circumstances. Your solicitor will no doubt be able to advice you about this.

The court will need to know about the current situation and a report from children’s services involved may be requested so they will have all the relevant information.

It seems you are doing your best to protect your son, you informed children’s services about your sister’s behaviour and you are seeking a discharge of the special guardianship order.

The court will want to know that there has been significant changes in respect of the issues that led to your son being removed from your care and, as am sure your solicitor has advised, the court will be consider what is best for your son his welfare will be its first consideration when deciding where he should live. Your sister can of course challenge your application and ask the court not to make the order you are seeking.

As you have a solicitor representing you in what is actually a private law matter, I do not think I am able to advise further. Our service advises where children’s services are involved and you may find it helpful to read our advice sheet An introductory guide to Children’s Services which explains the procedures children’s services should follow when they receive a referral.

Hope this is helpful.

Best wishes,


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