Help revoking an SGO

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Lr1991
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2018 12:01 pm

Help revoking an SGO

Post by Lr1991 » Tue Aug 14, 2018 4:59 pm

Hi. My 5 year old daughter got placed on an SGO with my parents this March. I'll try explain the best I can what happened. I moved out of my parents house when I was 16 (I'm 26 now. I had my daughter when I was 21). I was brought up in a middle class family and I went to an all girls school and I basically rebelled from it and ended up getting kicked out of college and 'ruining' my life. I was filled with endless regrets from moving out of what I could of done with my life. I was on benefits, never had a job or qualifications and I fell pregnant with my daughter in 2012. My daughters father was violent when he was drunk and we both consumed a lot of alcohol before my pregnancy and also after. We broke up in 2015 and my life took more of a spiral downhill from then. I fell into the wrong crowd and I was drinking a lot. I never new where my limit was and I drank until I near enough passed out. I got myself in around £16,000 of debt and I was drinking to try cope with life. My regrets, debt and low self esteem caused me to drink excessively to block it out. I got several warnings from social services and kept going back to my old ways. I wasn't a good mother. I failed to get my daughter to nursery, my house was always a mess and I always had people round, drinking. Last May (2017) I took an overdose whilst drunk when my daughter was in my sole care. I got rushed to hospital and my daughters father said enough was enough and him and social services put my daughter in his care. This was never a legal agreement and there was a written agreement to say when I had sorted myself out that my daughter would be put back into my care when her father and social services were satisfied I had changed for good. I started doing everything I could to make these changes. I stopped drinking and went onto antibuse (medication that you can't drink on and if you drink you would be severely ill), I moved house to a different town away from everyone and got a job in my new town. In October last year just as things were going well a court case began on my daughters father as he was suspected of causing an unexplained injury to his girlfriends son. To cut things short this March he was found guilty. When the court case began last september I said I wanted my daughter to be placed with my parents while the court case went on. The judge agreed and she was placed with them temporarily. In March at the final hearing the judge decided on an SGO to my parents as he said I hadn't had enough time to prove I had been stable (I'd been stable for 7 months at this point). I had unsupervised contact with my daughter all through the court case and 2 weeks after the court case I started having overnights. I have her overnight once a fortnight and the other week I have her unsupervised for 5 hours. I have always said I want to go back to try revoke the order I'm just looking for some advice.
I've been alcohol free for a year now
I've completed CBT
I've completed relapse prevention
I've been on an IVA for 3 months now for my debts (so I no longer have debts as I am in the IVA which lasts 4 years)
I've nearly completed work with foundation (for domestic violence)
I start a degree in psychology in october as I want to train to be an alcohol and drug worker to help people in similar situations to myself.
I've been with my partner for just over 2 years and we have lived together for 5 months now.
I am still in full time employment and so is my partner.
I had low confidence due to not losing my baby weight. Now I am fit and healthy and back to a normal weight.
I am currently doing my pass plus so I can get a car to be able to hopefully see my daughter more.

I never got on very well with my parents. During the court case they said they wanted my daughter back with me but if in the case she couldn't THEN they would want an SGO. A week before the final court date they decided they didn't want her with me anymore and wanted the SGO so they basically turned their back on me. They will not agree to getting the SGO revoked so I know it will be a LOT harder. I just want my daughter home with me as I have changed my life completely. I am hoping to come off my medication next month to be able to prove I will not go back to drink whilst I'm not on medication. I was just wanting some advice please on how long is best to wait. If I can get any help? and if there is anything else I should do etc...
Thank you

**** edited by Suzie to protect confidentiality.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2153
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Help revoking an SGO

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Fri Aug 17, 2018 5:26 pm

Dear Lr1991

Welcome to the parents’ discussion forum.

My name is Suzie, online adviser at Family Rights Group. I see from your post that you have had a difficult time growing up and fell into hard times which subsequently led to your daughter being removed from your care.

It must have been hard for you to accept that you could not look after your daughter safely so you made the decision that your parents were the best people to look after her during the court proceedings.

Congratulations that you have been able to turn your life around and address the problems you were facing. You have done well and hopefully you will be able to continue your recovery and maintain it in the longer term.

A special guardianship order was made to your parents only in March so you would not be able to return to court to seek a discharge of that order until 6 months have passed. You will need the permission of the court to do so. At the moment it appears that you are having a good level of contact with your daughter so her bond with you remains strong.

Should you make an application to the court, you will have to show that you have made significant changes to your life and the concerns that led to your daughter being removed from your care are no longer there. You will need to provide evidence to the court to substantiate the changes you say you say you have made.

Please see our advice sheet Special Guardianship: what does it mean for birth parents? which give more information about your situation.

Your parents may challenge your application to discharge the special guardianship order on the basis that their granddaughter is better off in their but just as before the court will be considering your daughter’s welfare as the most important thing.

As your application would be a private law matter, if you do not have a solicitor representing you, then you can telephone Child Law Advice pm 0300 330 5480 for advice and assistance.

I hope you will find this helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

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