Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

ScaredToBear
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Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2018 1:39 am

Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby ScaredToBear » Sat Jul 14, 2018 1:44 am

Yeah we have been complying. The social worker told me I should see my son every day, but I can no longer do that because she moved back to another country because of the black cloud above my head. I told her to go back to her dad's to get my son away from the black cloud. It was a mistake and I wish we found a home for her to live in here in xxxxx. Because now she's being told I can't see my son. Another country's services have never seen me or even assessed me. I can't fight because I'm struggling to cope at the moment and nobody will tell me what's going on. Another country said they can't tell me anything, and xxxxx said she didn't tell my girlfriend I can't see my son. My girlfriend was living with my brother, but because of a big fall out in the family, I told her she should go another country. They told her she had to leave anyway and i won't allow my son go up into a hostile. I was doing assessments in xxxxxx, but xxxxxxx has closed the case and handed details to another country. I don't think he's on any plan, because they said on the phone that IF he gets referred. He must be referred? xxxxxx sent the details straight to them. I do know that my brothers boyfriend told them I control my girlfriend, which is complete lies and my girlfriend confirmed it as nonsense. Long story short, I've basically lost my son because I was the victim of a crime (has nothing to do with my trial offenses). It feels unfair, I can't sleep, im completely broken. I've lost my dog (got put down), my family (my mum stands by me but she's also almost out of fight), my girlfriend and son. Sureley the world can't be so cruel? I must have something to help me fight? I'm living in constant anxiety, loneliness, paranoia and more. Also, there has been no updates with the police case. Please don't judge me or give judgemental replies because I'm out of energy. I'm a good person and would never harm kids. I've just made stupid mistakes because of my stupid mental health. I see my counsellor weekly and she said she believes me. I also got assessed by the hospitals mental health team and they said I'm stable. I suffer with bad social anxiety, but because of my rubbish past, people think differently of me. Thanks.
Last edited by Suzie, FRG Adviser on Mon Jul 16, 2018 11:48 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Kami2018
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Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby Kami2018 » Sat Jul 14, 2018 3:09 pm

You should seek a solicitor if xxxxx children's services say that u can see your son u should be able too and if xxxxxxx have been made aware of your partner and child being in xxxxxx they should have also been made aware that u can see your son I would phone them till they make some sense if they don't listen I'd seek legal advice
Last edited by Suzie, FRG Adviser on Mon Jul 16, 2018 11:47 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Edited to protect anonymity

ScaredToBear
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2018 1:39 am

Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby ScaredToBear » Sat Jul 14, 2018 5:44 pm

Kami2018 wrote:You should seek a solicitor if xxxxxx children's services say that u can see your son u should be able too and if xxxxxxx have been made aware of your partner and child being in xxxxxxx they should have also been made aware that u can see your son I would phone them till they make some sense if they don't listen I'd seek legal advice



Rang nearly every solicitor and none of them really want to get involved because it is complicated. Most say another country has different laws, so to ring a solicitors up in another country. The solicitors in another country say they can't give me anything because they can't discuss it over the phone. Also, children services just tell me they can't discuss anything with me over the phone too.
Last edited by Suzie, FRG Adviser on Mon Jul 16, 2018 11:50 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Kami2018
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Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby Kami2018 » Sun Jul 15, 2018 3:09 pm

I wish I knew how to advise you but I'm totally stuck on this one but there must be something someone can do out there never give up

ScaredToBear
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2018 1:39 am

Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby ScaredToBear » Tue Jul 17, 2018 2:24 am

Kami2018 wrote:I wish I knew how to advise you but I'm totally stuck on this one but there must be something someone can do out there never give up


Thanks. Vulture services in ****** won't tell me anything. I can't exactly travel to there because they'll just tell me to f off.
Last edited by Suzie, FRG Adviser on Tue Jul 17, 2018 2:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Foreigner
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Joined: Tue Apr 18, 2017 3:14 pm

Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby Foreigner » Tue Jul 17, 2018 10:26 pm

It will probably cost crazy amount of money but why don’t you try an international law solicitor? Someone who knows the laws in either country and could offer advice?

ScaredToBear
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2018 1:39 am

Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby ScaredToBear » Wed Jul 18, 2018 4:56 am

Foreigner wrote:It will probably cost crazy amount of money but why don’t you try an international law solicitor? Someone who knows the laws in either country and could offer advice?


I can't afford anything. The thing that bothers me the most is I waited 10 years to have a baby and all I wanted to do was be the best I could and watch his first walk, hear his first words and so on. But I will miss all that now. I wish dads had more support. I wish even more she would come back here, find a home to live separately and then fight children services together. That wont be happening though because 'she loves me', but is clearly scared and doesn't seem interested in me anymore. The black cloud above me swallowed her up.

ScaredToBear
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2018 1:39 am

Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby ScaredToBear » Sat Jul 21, 2018 3:39 am

Just an update. I spoke with the lucyfoundation who advised me to talk to stopitnow. I spent like 2 hours talking to this nice lady who have me a lot of useful advice. After I stopped my binge drink, I got back on track and felt like I had super human strength. The motivation and changes were just on fire. My confidence and everything was back. I went on a 4 mile walk, got home, ate pizza and felt good. Then in a matter of seconds, something happened to me. I went from smiles to nothing pretty instant.. I felt crushed, I felt like I was choking, I felt my world came crashing down with every mental problem hitting me at full power. I couldn't breathe and had to go straight to bed. The world felt unreal, but I still had mental stability. I just cried a lot and realised how selfish people are.. How stupid they can be to think I can be normal with being on trial, losing my dog, half my family, my girlfriend and son, as well as already having severe social anxiety. People like my 'girlfriend' who just gives a **** about getting her belongings back so she can hide in the hills only caring about her self, rather than me and my son. Then there's my mum who just constantly nags at me. I don't know what is going on.. I thought I was immune from breakdowns and attacks. I don't even know if I'll be fighting for my son in the future. You can fight and die of heart attack at the end of your impossible fight with vulture services, due to lack of team work from my future ex girlfriend. Or you can take it on the chin and walk away. I don't know... I'm in a dark place.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Re: Any advice please? I'm living in hell.

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Jul 30, 2018 3:36 pm

Dear ScaredToBear

Thank you for your updating post.

I was pleased to see that you had a very good experience and felt supported speaking to Lucy Faithfull Foundation and the Stop it now service. It must have been so helpful for you to feel so much better after your conversations.

Unfortunately, your mood changed very quickly and you now feel under that cloud you have mentioned in your posts. It is really important that you try to get help from your GP and/or mental health services so you are able to access the support you need.
Have you been in contact with Mind, you may want to telephone them on 0300 123 3393 for additional support and for a referral to your local service.

You have already been advised about the situation with your son following his mother’s move. I hope you have been able to get some advice from the service to which you were referred previously.

I am including a couple of links here to support line which you might find helpful in respect of anxiety and depression

I hope you will be able to get the advice and support you need regarding your son and your health.

Best wishes

Suzie


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