Moving away with my children

mrl
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2018 1:47 pm

Moving away with my children

Postby mrl » Wed Jan 10, 2018 4:30 pm

I currently live with my partner and i'm the main carer of my 7 and 9 year old male children (from another woman), and have been constantly for the last 6+ months.
The mother of my boys is an alcoholic and has failed rehab 4 times, and because of this and her constant drinking the boys are on a Child Protection Plan, and can only see their mother when she is being supervised by her mother (their grandmother).
For the last year or so my boys mother and her family have made mine and my partners life hell with lots of threats to kill us, verbal abuse, lies, my house and car have been graffiti'd, my car smashed up and my current partner has even been physically attacked by my boys mother on two occasions....all incidents of note have been reported to the police....everything is on record but no convictions.
My boys mother still continues to drink and still turns up drunk to the school, and with her family, continue to try and make mine and my partners life hell.
My current partner has had enough with the whole situation and has said she is deciding now if she wants me to leave the house (she is the only person on the tenancy). I have no friends or family in the area and i live in fear of what may happen next to me, my house or car and my only choice would be to take the boys up north where my mother, father and the rest of my family live, they would be more than happy to help me with the boys and also financially.
The social services have no concerns with me or my care of the children.
There are no legal orders in place for the boys.
A social services worker has indicated that I’m well within my rights to move up north and they think that the case would be transferred to the local social services, and because there are no issues with me or me looking after the boys they think the protection plan would be removed.
Just wanted to seek a second opinion: Should i be made homeless or split from my partner, am i well within my rights to take the boys up North to live? None of my relatives have any issues with drugs, alcohol or the law.

Kind Regards,

User avatar
Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2088
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Moving away with my children

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Mon Jan 15, 2018 6:12 pm

Dear mrl

Thank you for your post and welcome to the Board.

I am sorry to hear that you are having a difficult time at the moment and that you may need to move in order to safeguard your sons from harm from their mother and her wider family.

You say that your sons live with you and that there are no concerns regarding their care but that if you move North, your current Children’s Services Department will advise the new local authority of your move, this is quite normal. In my opinion, may I suggest that you apply for a Child Arrangements Order? It is likely that the application would be at your expense but you may not need to engage a solicitor to assist you in court. Our advice sheet will give you more information about how to do this. Here are some other websites that may be helpful:

Child Law Advice

Advice Now

Legal Aid

Gingerbread


With regard to your partner, her security and the security of your household in general, a non-molestation order against the mother of your children may useful and might ‘fix’ or ease the problem and enable you to stay together.

I hope this information is useful.

Best wishes

Suzie

mrl
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2018 1:47 pm

Re: Moving away with my children

Postby mrl » Mon Jan 15, 2018 10:09 pm

Hi Suzie,

Thanks for the reply.

So just to confirm.....I'm well within my rights to take the children?

You mentioned the child arrangements order.....am I to consider this once I've moved?

I would be happy initially to give my address to the social services....but not the ex....as I'd fear we'd get the same level of abuse and possibly criminal damage and graffiti....would this be considered acceptable?

Kind Regards,
mrl

User avatar
Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2088
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Moving away with my children

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jan 24, 2018 1:06 pm

Hi Mrl,

Do you have legal parental responsibility for your children? Have a look at our advice sheet about parental responsibility .

If you do have legal parental responsibility, you can take the children to a different part of England and Wales without needing the consent of mum or a court order. However, you should be mindful about the contact that your children do have with mum and whether a break in contact is in their best long term interests. There is also a presumption that both parents are involved in the upbringing of your children. Such action may force mum to seek urgent orders. That is why I suggested that you seek a child arrangement’s order now rather than then wait for mum to seek an urgent order from the court at a later date where your move up north would be scrutinised.

In respect of any court application in the family court, you can ask for your address to remain confidential although the court may not agree.
Private law children act applications are not within our remit so we are not able to give detailed advice about your options. Instead contact the organisations that I mentioned in my first post to you.

I just wish to confirm that when children are on child protection plans then if you decide to move, it is very important that you let children’s services know your new address so that the plan can be transferred and to avoid you being in breach of the plan.

Best wishes,

Suzie


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