Need advice, please.

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Joined: Sat Nov 18, 2017 6:00 pm

Need advice, please.

Post by haken102 » Mon Nov 20, 2017 10:42 pm

My situation right now:

1. My son, ** came home from school and he was fine, i picked him up all normal. I was cooking and he was playing with his younger sibblings in the living room play area.
2. After i finish doing the prep for dinner, i went to check up on them when i noticed a red mark on his face. The mark stretch from under his eyes, down his cheeks and stop at around his nose.
3. I questioned him about where and how he got the mark, he was surprise at the question and said what mark? Then he went back to play time.
4. My husband arrive home from work and immediately noticed the mark on [son's] face. He spoke to me about it and we both confront him about the mark. [Son] said he did not know what caused it and he said it does not hurt.
5. The next morning, my husband wash [son's] face, to get him ready for school. [Son] still said it doesnt hurt. My husband drop him off at school and waved good bye.

Now the problems starts

6. At 1:30 in the afternoon, i received a call from Social Services, telling me to go to school immediately.
7. I arrived at the school and met 2 Social Workers along with teachers and police officers.
8. They are suspicious about the nature of the mark on [son's] face. They took all 3 kids and me to Hospital.
9. I was interviewed, doctor check up and more interviews with police, NHS doctors and SW.
10. I was very adamant that I never hit my kids, at all. But the doctor said that he will put this down as a non accidental injury. Police were also very vague, they send us home without any information, no letters, no notice. Just: "Hand us the kids voluntarily, we will call you tomorrow. If you dont hand them over tonight, we will take them away one way or another"
11. They decided to keep the kids under police protection for 72 hours. We went home after.

A few days later.

12. After various interviews over the course of two days. I attended court today.
13. I found out from my solicitors that my son told them that [son's] was being hit me. This was his interviewed on the day.
14. His second interview with the police, he told them both me and my husband hit him.
15. Police said his interviews were very vague and does not fit properly.
16. My daughter, ** did not reply to the police at all.

After court.

17. After court, our solicitors advice us that we will be able to see the kids tomorrow, at an arranged time.
18. The kids are still under foster care after 4 days.
19. We have aunties and close friends listed under potential people that our kids could live with. We would rather have our family or close friends in charge of the kids than foster care :(

Thank you for taking your time to read. Please please send me any advice. I can't sleep, can't eat. My husband started smoking again. We need all the help we can. We would really appreciate any help you can provide.

Edited by Suzie in accordance with our rules to maintain confidentiality

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Need advice, please.

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Nov 22, 2017 5:27 pm

Dear Haken102

Welcome to the Parents’ Discussion Board and thank you for your post.

My name is Suzie, online adviser, at Family Rights Group. I can see from your post that you are having a difficult time because of children’s services involvement with your family. It must be frustrating for you that your son has been injured but you have no explanation.

Unfortunately, as your son has alleged that both you and his father has hit him so he will be believed unless there is some other acceptable explanation. The hospital has decided that the injury was non-accidental suggesting it was caused deliberately. This will be a cause of concern for children’s services and a safeguarding issue which has led them to take action. You do not say in your post how old your son is but I assume that he is old enough to be able to explain what happened to him whether by accident or not.

It appears the school made a referral to children’s services who in turn attended the school with the police so your son could be taken into police protection. Children’s services cannot legally remove your child without your consent or a court order but the police can for 72 hours as you mentioned in your post. The social worker could have asked you to give consent under s.20 of the Children Act 1989 to enable them to accommodate your son. If you did not agree to this then the police can, as they did remove for 72 hours.

Children’s services would have to obtain a court order at the end of the 72 hours or get your agreement to keep your son in foster care.

At the court hearing did your solicitor or you put forward the family members who would be able o care for your children? Normally children’s services should consider parent, family member and friends before placing with stranger foster carers. It is not clear from your post why family members were not considered. I suggest you ask your solicitor to request on your behalf that family member(s) are assessed to care for your children. Please see our advice sheet regarding children being looked after by family and friends in an emergency.

Has children’s services provided a care plan for the children’s placement and are you having regular contact? Please see our advice sheet about the duties that children’s services has when a child is in the care system.

I am also including here a copy of our advice sheet relating to ... edings.pdf care proceedings[/b to give you more details of how the court process works.

The final decision about your children will be made by a judge after all assessments and evidence has been considered at a final hearing. Before you get to this stage, I strongly recommend that you work with children’s services effectively so that you will get the best outcome for your children.

If it has not already been suggested, I think you should ask to have a family group conference so that family and friends can meet to decide how best they can support the family. Please see our advice sheet about this here

Should you wish to speak to an adviser, please telephone our free, confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday (except Bank Holidays)

I hope this is helpful

Best wishes


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