Please help
Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 12:43 pm
First time poster here ladies, in a terrible position just now and need advice on what to do. I am currently in a relationship with a man who has a kid from a previous relationship, we have been together 6 years now and everything was going well and we were planning on starting our own family but I have now been asked to adopt a family members 2 year old son due to them no longer been able to care for him.
I have already been caring for him for the past 6 weeks which was meant to be a temporary basis while his mum sorted her problems but has failed to do so, now they want me to keep him.
I don't know what to do, they have told me that I would be supported in all ways including benefit payments of roughly £200 per week allowing me to cut down my job to care for him. Problem is I'm worried more about things like treating him compared to my own child when I have one and him ruining my experience of having my first child.
I know I sound the most selfish person ever and yes one minute I want to keep him because I know I love him and can give him a good life but next minute I want to give him up because I can see him ruining my life. There is no other family that could take him so it's me or proper adoption. I don't know what to do, I just feel so trapped. I know he would go to a good home but he is family and I do love him.
My husband thinks we should keep him but he already has a child and I don't think the whole first child experience and bringing them home will ever mean the same to a man as it does us ladies.
I don't know what to do. Please help!
I have already been caring for him for the past 6 weeks which was meant to be a temporary basis while his mum sorted her problems but has failed to do so, now they want me to keep him.
I don't know what to do, they have told me that I would be supported in all ways including benefit payments of roughly £200 per week allowing me to cut down my job to care for him. Problem is I'm worried more about things like treating him compared to my own child when I have one and him ruining my experience of having my first child.
I know I sound the most selfish person ever and yes one minute I want to keep him because I know I love him and can give him a good life but next minute I want to give him up because I can see him ruining my life. There is no other family that could take him so it's me or proper adoption. I don't know what to do, I just feel so trapped. I know he would go to a good home but he is family and I do love him.
My husband thinks we should keep him but he already has a child and I don't think the whole first child experience and bringing them home will ever mean the same to a man as it does us ladies.
I don't know what to do. Please help!