Help

[Ukjeff27]

Right.. deep breath as this is a long story..

We have two daughters aged sixteen and seventeen, and twin sons aged ten.
The twin boys at aged around five were unfortunately diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder.
The boys also have or had extreme separation anxiety disorder, this prevented them from attending school without mum present.
This went on until the health professionals became involved, initiated by us, the parents.
They were seen by health professionals for a whille and eventually social services became involved
They were put under child protection and remained in our care.
They were then two years ago seen by a child psychologist Dr Ritchie who recommended they be removed from our care for a year to break the separation.
This thankfully was not acted on by the LA due to the boys improvement and increasing part time school attendance.
Unfortunately six months ago there was a blip and one boy felt he could no longer work with his teaching assistant and the school refused to change her.
Eventually the school relented and changed the TA and slowly but surely the boys returned to school and one is back on afternoons.
The LA decided two weeks ago to apply for an interim care order and this was NOT granted due to the out of date assessment etc
And last night the LA informed us that at today's planning meeting they would be appealing this decision.
I'm due there today at the family court and am terrified they have the right to this appeal.
The three to four months timescale before the final hearing would've given us time to get new assessments on the boys condition and a parental assessment.
We feel enforced separation would bring the boys immense psychological harm and feel this is not the way forward.
Any advice given would be greatly appreciated.

[Minnie]

Hi

My daughter has an attachment disorder and she has been separated from me for the last 7 months. She has just been returned to her father under a full care order. She is remains separated from me and could do from the rest of her childhood. The emotional damage caused to her has been horrendous,her behaviour has spiralled out of control,the local authority have blamed me for this. The psychologist recommended the girls returned to me and the LA and guardian recommended their father. He has little to do with them for 4 years. The final hearing was 2 weeks ago,I would fight for your boys. I fought for my girls right up until final day. I was told by the social workers that there was nothing wrong with my daughter and she went on to be diagnosed by the psychologist with 3 behavioural conditions. I feel she will be diagnosed with more when camhs become involved and the ed psychologist completes her assessment.
Good luck,hope it goes well

[Ukjeff27]

Well, what a roller coaster of a day, the appeal was not granted, so the local authority has escalated this to the high Court.
Final care proceedings are now set for the end of November barring any appeal.
Social services have refused a supervision order and have instead opted for us to sign a contract allowing access.
We feel Social Services should be using this time to keep us together as a family rather than using this time to beef up their evidence against us.

[Ukjeff27]

Thank you for your reply Minnie...keep fighting.

[Minnie]

Your last sentence is exactly how I feel,rather than tear families apart,they should keep them together.

[Har1Her1]

Hello,

There seems to be an inherent problems in CSC and other agencies with respect to the way they respond to families where children have special needs/challenging behaviour. A survey into parent/carers' experiences with CSC when a child has autism is available on the members' forum of the PDA Society www.pdasociety.org.uk. It is small scale, but the results suggest that there is a dire need for professionals in CSC to receive meaningful autism specific training; that parents are often unaware they can have a Carer's Assessment and support; that the criteria for accessing respite is set far too high; that there seems to be a culture of 'blame' (or a focus on parental function) and a disregard for the complexities of managing the behaviours of children and young people with behaviour that challenges and that families are often left to battle in extremely challenging circumstances until a crisis arises and then heavy-handed interventions are instigated.

I am so sorry this is happening to you. There are far too many families that are being torn apart because professionals 'blame' parents for their children's complex needs. It seems that we have not moved on in any significant sense, from the days of Kanner and Bettleheim who suggested that autism was caused by faulty parenting and the children could be cured by placing them with warm and loving foster parents.

Later this week, I will face the second Child Protection Conference in a year. I suppose in a way there is less likelihood that my children will be subjected (eventually) to care orders because they are 15 and 17 and have very challenging behaviour. They are taking a different route with my eldest: one which involves an arrest on dubious grounds; an unnecessary forensic assessment and the possibility of a custodial sentence. Police involvement arose through social services panicking - because they do not know how to respond to he communications of a young man with autism and mental ill health.

I want to respect social services and I can understand that hey have a very difficult job to do. However, I think there needs to be a much more specialised team who can work effectively with families who have children with challenging behaviour.

[Minnie]

To everyone

I'm glad there are people in the same position as me,I have been told I lack insight into the professionals working with me. This is the only reason I don't have my girls and this makes them at risk of emotional/psychological harm in my care. I have questioned and not always agreed with what my social worker has said ,if I had towed the line with him. I would probably have my girls. My social worker's behaviour towards me became personal. Every other professional I have worked with,no problems,this was acknowledged in court

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear UKjeff27

Welcome to the Family Rights Group Parents’ Discussion Forum and thank you for your post.

My name is Suzie, online adviser, at Family Rights Group.

I am sorry that you are having such a worrying and difficult time because of children services’ (new name for children services) involvement with your family.

It appears that you have had children services involvement with your family for some time now. From your post it appears that the concerns relate to your boys’ separation disorder and how it affected their attendance at school. Were there any other concerns that led children services to consider that the children were at risk of significant harm which required child protection enquiries and the subsequent child protection plans being put in place? Usually, if parents work with the child protection plan which is in place, children services would not usually seek a court order to share parental responsibility. Are there other issues that are of concern to children services regarding the children? The children’s diagnosis with autism should have meant them being assessed as children in need and appropriate support offered to them and you as parents.

As you are now in care proceedings, I think your solicitor will be able to advise you as to the best way to challenge the case being put by children services to have a care order. This seems to be happening as you have been able to successfully oppose an interim care order and the appeal from children services has not been upheld. Children services, you say, are seeking the appeal the decision further so you will need to wait and see how this works out. In the meantime, I suggest that you continue to work with your legal team who are best placed to advise you on the details of the case. Your solicitor will no doubt have advised you in relation to appeals and the fact that either side can lodge appeal where there are grounds to do so.

Regarding the period between now and the final hearing in November, I advise you to work with and fully cooperate with children services in respect of any assessments to be carried out. Children services have to show with appropriate evidence that the threshold for a care order is satisfied and the court will not make a final care order unless the threshold is met. Our advice sheet relating to care proceedings is here for your further information.

The time now is for you to show that you are working to ensure that your children can safely remain in your care. This means working as much as you can with children services and other professionals involved with your children. Does the children’s guardian support children services regarding what is best for the children? Please make sure that you adhere to written agreement because failure to do so could lead to children services saying that you are unable to work with professionals to safeguard your children.

As a parent you will want your children to remain in your care but it will be for the court, on the evidence, to make the final decision regarding the children’s welfare and how best this can be achieved to ensure they are brought up in a safe and stable environment. This should include the children having appropriate support to meet their individual needs. The children's welfare will be the court's paramount consideration when making its final decision.

Should you wish to speak to an adviser, please telephone our free confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open Monday to Friday from 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m.

I hope you find this of help.

Best wishes

Suzie