Two beautiful girls placed under sgo due to my mental healt

[i_love_my_girls]

Hi I have two beautiful girls that have been placed under sgo due to me asking sw for support with my ongoing mental health (now wishing I just struggled quietly) the reason I asked sw for help was because I was getting nowhere with CMHT/psychology services and thought their support/letter would help me get the help needed. The sw went for an interim care order placing my girls with paternal gran. At court it was clear they had no concern for my parenting but my mental health had deteriorated since my girls went to grans and the judge ordered 6-12 with mental health services before I can revoke the sgo. 2year later and many referals I am still getting nowhere with mental health team as they just reject any refural. Stating that there is no cure for emotionally unstable personality disorder and they don't do DBT within their service. Just some one to talk to would of been better than nothing. My GP is the only support I have but he's leaving in two weeks and will find it hard to trust and talk openly to another GP. My GP doesn't know what to do anymore as he can only make the refurals and that's going nowhere, so we both at the end of our teathers... I don't want to give up with cmht as I feel as though I am giving on my girls and I really need them home as I can care for them better than their gran as they have no boundaries and little ones eczema is at its worst due to dusty house and lack of hygiene ...... I suppose my question is, how can I get the help that is order by the court if the services refuse to even acknowledge me....Any advice will be very appreciated.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear I_love_ my_ girls

My name is Suzie, one of FRG’s online advisers. Welcome to the parents’ discussion board.

I am sorry to hear that your two girls have been placed under a special guardianship order because what you feel amounts to a lack of support offered to you in respect of your mental health issues.

You may find it helpful to look through our SGO advice sheet for parents who are going through the same process. Whilst there is no guarantee of success, you may find some helpful tips about what you can do to attempt to get the SG overturned and also about the level of support you may be entitled to.

For instance, it may be possible to find out if your child was not assessed as ‘Looked After’ before the SGO was in place. If they were not, then you could be offered practical help i.e. counselling, referrals to local agencies specifically for you.

The Local Authority have the power to assess your need for support but do not have to. If support is agreed they should draw up a plan and you should be given 28 days to respond to this report.

You can ask for a copy of the Local threshold document from the social worker as this should clearly outline their procedure of how they would work with you and families in a similar situation in your area.

It must be frustrating to hear that once the DBT referral was made, the Community Mental Health Team (CMHT) were not able to offer assistance due to the fact they do not offer that type of therapy in their practice.

Were they able to provide suggestions about how you may be able to access the recommended support, or were you just signposted back to your GP to refer you elsewhere?

In respect to the placement have you tried to raise your concerns directly with the special guardian. If this proves too difficult, and assuming that the Local Authority are no longer involved, you could escalate this by attempting mediation as a way to work through your relationship issues.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes

Suzie

[i_love_my_girls]

Hi Suzie thank you very much for the information provided. I will read through the SGO. As for support via social services. I got refurred to families in care, when I met the very nice lady. She had traveled by bus from the other end of town, and at the same time this lady was battling cancer and having to travle to meet me , witch made me feel awful as I was leaving and didn't make another appointment!

LA are still involved, I have raised the concerns to the SW and her response was that she herself notices a lack of bounderies in both girls and also that the youngest seem to be around a lot of adult conversations. They are working on it apparently but to be honest I don't think their bothered.
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I have also had firm words (a nice as possible, not to insult her) with their gran about bathing every night and moisterising both their skin, but she just agrees weather she likes it or not but when she get back home I might as well of been talking to a brick wall. Like today she picked girls up telling my oldest she was getting a bath and her hair washed as its not been washed since saturday when i bathed them

The refural to CMHT wasnt for the DBT, it was for support for me and support and advice for my doctor too. They have had numerous refurals from different Services and either refused or seen me 3sessions and discharged me. This last refural took ages to get a response after phone to follow it up, they finally wrote diagnosed me with emotionally unstable personality disorder, stated there is no treatments but to try mood stabilisers and also try awareness of DBT corse and to find the information online, when I looked online they are out of town and 10oclock start. This is extremely difficult for me as I suffur with anxiety and can't use busses without getting hot flushes,rapid heartbeat and sickness. so i very rarely leaving the estate i live on unless it in walkin distance and i couldnt possably walk 15 mile befor 10 in the morning.

Thank you for your help and time!!!