Advice needed please

[Joo]

Hi all
I wonder if anyone could help me.
Quick background....
Son was born 1999 (16 end of December) I was with mother for 12 years, we never married and split when son was 4. I have had regular contact with him since. Pay my child support etc etc
5 years ago I moved 350 miles from my son but continue to see him I pick him up and he stays with me every school holidays. If there is an issue I will go help him mum sort it out for example she phoned me a few moths back and said he wouldn't go to school. I jumped in my car drove the 700 mile round trip but I didn't care as he went to school that day all be it a little late. Basically just letting you know I'm still VERY involved with my son.

Last Thursday I received a phone call from my exs mother. Informing me that the previous Saturday Social Services (or what ever they are called these days) had taken my son because my ex was neglecting/abusing him. ( I had noticed him smelling and mentioned it to ex) apparently he has been "signed over" to an Aunt. Sons mum also moved there too as her house was deemed unfit for human habitation. I know for a fact she emotionally blackmails him as she has done it on the phone to him while he's been with us.

I called Social Services straight way and they said this was the case. That son was being very neglected and they had been involved with her for a few months with no improvement. Ex told them I was out of the picture!
They are also looking into the fact he has so many illnesses and is always at the hospital. Again they seemed shocked when we told them he was fine whilst with us. I have wanted to get my son out of there or a while but I know how his mum works and he's a good kid and never want to "betray" her. Her Mother also informed me that she is "not right in the head" and they are trying to get her sectioned ( can you even still do that?) I knew things were bad but not this bad

I told them I would like my son to come to me as he is always happy and well cared for here and the social worker mumbled something about wanting to keep him in the same school. This hardly matters as he gets bullied and his attendance if only 22% anyway so it's not as if he attends that school anyway. I also told them about my concerns about where he had been place as I know both the aunts sons take drugs and burgle homes. and they say they are not living there. No because they are both in prison at the moment for burgling my sons home!
I even had to have a police check (WTF did I do wrong?) so he can visit this upcoming holiday.

There was a meeting (no idea what for) on Friday and someone was supposed to call me back to let me know what happened. So far nobody has.
I have looked into schools and can get him in the one my partner works at. They will help him settle quickly so he can continue his GCSE year.

At the end of the day They have basically said she can't have him and I am willing and able to take over but it's like i'm just a bystander in my sons life.. Why do I have to ask social services for my son? Why does he not automatically come to me? There is ZERO reason why he cannot be here getting the care needs right now. They just want seem to want to hum and ahh and not really give me an answer.
Any advice on my rights or what I can do next would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Joo,

I am sorry to hear that your 15 year old son was removed from his home by children services and placed with an aunt. You say mum has moved into that home as well.

Do you know whether your son is considered to be a “looked after child”? ie in the care system.

If he is, look at our advice sheet about duties to children in the care system .


I note that you are dad but it is not clear whether you have the legal parental responsibility. Look at our advice sheet about parental responsibility .


If you do have parental responsibility, you have the option of removing your son from his aunt’s home. Although I would not recommend doing this without first consulting with children services and doing this in a planned way to minimize any upset to your son.

However, when your son is 16-in the next few months –only he can decide whether or not to leave accommodation.

You advised children services that he could come and live with you but they do not seem keen to assess you. However, when children come into the care system, they should first of all consider placing with parents, second with connected persons (friends and family) before foster care.

You should email the social worker (copy in the manager) and ask that you are assessed as soon as possible and for your son to move to your care.
Also ask them to advise you about what type of meeting took place and why you were not invited to this. Ask for the outcome of the meeting and minutes.

You should also ask for the name and contact details of the independent reviewing officer-who is the person who will manage your sons care plan.
I hope this helps. If you have any questions please post back. Let us know how it goes.

Best wishes,

Suzie

[Joo]

Hi Suzie thank you for you reply.

From what I can gather from his social worker at the moment he seems to have been voluntarily placed with the Aunt but this would quickly change if mum were to try and take him back. Social services didn't even consider placing him with me as they were more or less told I didn't exist!

I don't have parental rights as son was born in 1999 and we never married.

Social worker has advised me to go the legal route as "the longer he is around mum the more damage she will do" Protective services have spoken to son and they have said he is already being coached on what to say " its' like he's reading from a script" they say. But yet they leave him there?!
I don't know if it's because I don't have parental rights or because (as someone suggested) he's 16 in 2 months so will not be their problem.

I have a meeting with a solicitor Friday AM to find out what I can do next. I just want y boy safe and happy.