ADVICE NEEDED ASAP!!

[lilem219x]

Hi All. I need some advice. My eldest son was sadly adopted 2 years ago due to DV while i was pregnant. Last year i gave birth to my second son lets call him Luke* He has the same father as my eldest. he was put on the CPR (Child Protection Register) when i was pregnant and was taken of December when he was 5 months old. He remained in my care and was never put in care. I was aloud to keep him due to the fact i wasnt having contact with his father and we were not in a relationship and were not planning on getting into one. A few months back i slept with my chldrens father again and am now pregnant. I would like to know what will happen now. I obviously know that childrens services will get involved because of the past but i would like to know if there is a chance that Luke* will be taken from me if i continue with the pregnancy. Me and Lukes* dad have not had ongoing contact was just a drunken situtaion. I know longer have a social worker and havent had since Luke* was taken of the CPR. I need some serious advice and FAST. Please give me some advice.
Many Thanks

[justiceisaright]

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[justiceisaright]

mmm

[lilem219x]

I don't have contact with him. Was a drunken mistake on a night out. Not like it was planned. I'm not sure I want to lie to children's services. I lied with my eldest and he ended up being adopted. With my second I was honed and truthful and I was able to keep him.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear lilem219x

Welcome to Family Rights Group Parents’ Discussion Forum.

My name is Suzie and I am an Adviser at Family Rights Group.

I am sorry that you are feeling worried and distressed about the fact that you are pregnant by children’s father and concerned what Children Services response is likely to be due to historical issues relating to him.

It is great that you were able to work well with Children Services to the extent that they were satisfied your son could remain in your care without being on a child protection plan. Children Services are likely to be concerned about your further involvement with the children’s father but it is important that if you decide to continue with your pregnancy that you inform children services. You should be open and honest with them about what happened.

As far as your son being removed from you this will not just happen as Children Services are not able to remove your child from you without your consent or a court order. The only circumstances in which a child can be removed would be by the police under what is known as police protection, this will only happen if the child is at immediate risk of harm. The period of the removal is 72 hours and if the child is not returned then Children Services would need your consent or a court order to keep the child in foster care.

Having explained the process of how a child can be removed, I do not think Children Services will make any decision until they have had an opportunity to speak with you to clarify your situation. They will want to be sure that there is no likelihood of you continuing a relationship with your children’s father because of his previous behaviour. Children Services will want to be able to trust you regarding your former partner.
You have not said in your post how you came to meet with your partner so that you were involved in a ‘drunken’ encounter with him. Children Services will be concerned about this and whether you are meeting him secretly. If Children Services believe you are involved with the children’s father they may decide to carry out child protection enquiries in relation to your son and your unborn baby if you decide to continue your pregnancy. Our advice sheet relating to child protection procedures will give your more information.

I see that you have had responses from ‘justiceisaright’ and my advice as you have clearly indicated in your subsequent is not to lie to Children Services because if you do and it comes to light later, this would not help your situation at all. Even if you said you did not know who the father is, if children services did not believe you it would be possible to find out by a DNA test because the children would be full siblings. You have already experienced what happens when you lie and do not cooperate with Children Services, so know that this is really not an option.
Our interactive pages on our website will give you further information about your particular situation. You can also access our frequently asked questions here .

If you decide to continue with your pregnancy you should inform Children Services sooner rather than later. This will show that you want to be open and honest with them. There is no social worker for your son at present because the case would have been closed when he was removed from the child protection plan. I suggest you contact Children Services and speak with the social worker who was dealing with your case or his or her Team Manager about your situation.

Children Services will need to carry out an assessment before deciding that you are unable to safely care for your son. However, I think if you are open and honest with them it might not come to that, although they may want you to agree to sever ties with your children's father. Is there any arrangement of his to have contact with his son at present? Do you have a support network of family and friends who would be there for you, your son and the baby if you decide to continue with the pregnancy?

You really will need to speak to Children Services about your situation even if you do not carrying on with your pregnancy as if they find out you are in contact with the father this could be a cause for concern as well.

I hope you find this information helpful but if you wish to speak to an Adviser, please telephone our free advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open Monday to Friday from 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m.

Best wishes,

Suzie

[lilem219x]

Hi Suzie,
Thanks for your reply. The father does has contact but not what you would say consistent.
The drunken incident was a night out with friends and I have not spoken to him since.