Updated with the most amazing news!!

[alfie1606]

As of today an application has gone into court to discharge the care order on my partners 7 year old son.

It has been a long and hard process to get to this point but here we are...at the bottom of another large hill!

My partners son was taken into care in 2012 due to domestic violence, substance misuse (drug abuse on mothers side and alcohol on fathers side) and neglect. When I met him in 2013, he had already started to make some massive changes to his life and continues to work hard at being a good man. He does not drink to excess, has never been abusive or violent towards me, he works hard and respects both me and my son. We have a fantastic life, but there is always been a piece missing - his son!

My partner has proactively sought help for all his issues, attended course after course, group after group, fully engaged with everything he has taken part in, he has moved away from old associates and basically started life all over again. I am so proud of him. He is an amazing step father to my son. Last year children's services got involved in our lives due to their concerns with my partners past, following a very intense 6 month assessment they found no problems or concerns and reported everything was positive and my partner was classified as 'low risk'. This was the first dealings I had with Children's services in my 9 years as a mum, and I have to say it was a very unsettling time for all of us! Despite the glowing report we have had from children's services, they remain reluctant to consider a rehabilitation plan for my partners son. So we find ourselves spending a fortune on solicitors and fighting the care plan ourselves!
Our solicitor tells us he has done everything he can to prove the concerns that were in place when the order was made are no longer relevant, our friends and family can see no reason why our application will not be successful, but who knows! We will continue to be positive and battle it out!! Please wish us luck. Promise to keep you all up dated. I would just love to be able to come back and give everyone some hope!

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear alfie1606

Well done to you and your partner for making the decision to apply to the court to discharge the care order relating to your partner’s son.

Your partner appears to have done all he can to deal with the issues on his part that led to his son being taken into and the social worker should give him credit for this. Has the social worker given any specific reasons as to why Children Services do not support your partner’s son returning to his care? There is just one point in your post that is unclear you say that he had a problem with alcohol in the past but he does not drink to excess. If he had a problem to the extent that his son could not remain in his care, and he has addressed this through an alcohol support service that he should probably not be drinking at all.

The concerns regarding your own son being around your partner do not seem to be there anymore. If they do not have any worries about your son it seems surprising that they think it is unsafe for his own son to live with him. I assume that your partner has been having regular contact with his son and this is going well. Please do read our advice sheet about reuniting children with their families which I hope will give you more information about what Children Services should do when a child’s parent or family want to have them return to the family.

As your partner is being represented in this application, his solicitor would have advised about whether it would or not to make the application based on his current circumstances and the historical concerns that led to son being removed. My advice is that you should remember that the court's paramount consideration is the child's welfare. The court will therefore be looking at whether it would be in the child's interests to be moved from his current placement to his father's care.

Does your partner’s son have any problems in respect of his behaviour or any special needs which might be of concern to Children Services why they do not agree to his return to his father’s care? A copy of our advice sheet about the duties Children Services have when a child is in care for your information.

Your solicitor will be able to put forward a good case to the court on your partner’s behalf but you should both remember and the court’s main concern will be his son’s welfare and whether it would be better for him to return to his father’s care.

I wish you both the very best of luck and hope that the court will take full account of the changes made on your partner’s part in addressing his issues.

Best wishes,

Suzie

[alfie1606]

Thank you for your reply. My partner has not had any information for children's services regarding why they do not support his application. He has asked for a rehabilitation plan and received no response! His son's social worker has not looked into any of the changes he has made or even read the report completed on my son. We have an ongoing complaint with out local authority regarding this lack of involvement. His son has no special needs or behavioural implications and all contact is very positive. My partners solicitor believes he has a very strong case. We are both however, full aware of the possible outcomes and also only wish what is best for his son. Regarding alcohol, binge drinking was one factor of many reason, he was however not consuming a chronic amount and was not dependant. My partner no longer binge drinks or gets drunk, he never drinks around children, only choosing to enjoy the odd pint with friends and family on a very irregular basis.

We remain positive xx

[alfie1606]

Just wanted to update you all, maybe this will help you keep some hope!
We had the initial hearing this week and it went as well as we could of hoped. The judge was very angry and upset with the local authority for failing to complete an assessment on my partner despite their knowledge of the massive changes he has made since the orders were made. The judge stated that if she was him she would not want the local authority to assess him now as they are clearly biased against him! As a result she has recommended we source an independent social worker to complete a full assessment. This will cost a substantial amount of money as it has to be funded privately but should be worth every penny. At least we will know that every thing has been done properly and whatever the outcome it will be based on all on the facts! So next stage is back to court in 6 weeks time to put in application for independent review. It's such a slow process which is frustrating but moving in the right direction. All we have ever asked is that before a decision is made someone took the time to look at us! Once again wish us luck! Good luck to everyone fighting their own battles. Never lose hope xxx

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear alfie1606

Thank you for sharing the news that the court had directed your partner to be assessed. What was the outcome of his assessment?

Whilst only one stage of what can often be a complex legal process, it may offer a glimmer of hope to other members of this forum.

Best Wishes

Suzie

[alfie1606]

since I last posted we have been on the craziest of rollercoaster rides!
The judge ordered that a parenting and viability assessment be completed on both my partner and I. This was completed over the summer and resulted in an extremely positive report. The independent social worker could find no areas of concerns. As a result of this the Local authority realised they had to look more closely at our application, the guardian strongly supported it and the child's mother remained opposed...that was until we went to court yesterday.....whilst in the court building, mum explained her new position..she had some concerns but on the whole now supported the application. Consequently, the Local Authority u-turned and also supported the application!!! All parties are now in agreement that reunification will happen!!!! The judge agreed and therefore My partners son is definitely coming to live with us. We are now in a period of consultation whilst all parties agree the rehabilitation plan. The plan is likely to run over 12-15 weeks. All being well we can expect him to move in full time by Easter.

I don't expect reunification to run completely smoothly, nor do I expect it to be easy, however everyone is on board, everyone is positive and with that attitude we will be able to support each other and most importantly my partners son (and my own son!)

I cannot express how happy we all are, my son is beaming from ear to ear at the prospect of sharing his life with my partners son! My partner and I are just in shock!! We were ready for another battle in court yesterday and it didn't come!

I hope you can all take some hope from this...I have learnt so many lessons along the way, and continue to learn, most importantly I have learnt never to take no for an answer, challenge everything, push for explanations to decisions and never give up!!

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear alfie1606

Thank you very much for your updating post. It is really fantastic to hear of good outcomes for families.

It is wonderful news that your partner’s son will be returning to his care and your family unit will be complete in a few months from now.

I am sure that other posters on the forum will be able to take hope from this. It shows that if parents are able to make significant changes in their lives it is possible, not easy, to have a child reunited with the family.

I wish you all the very best and hope there will be many years of happy family life for you all.

Best wishes

Suzie

[alfie1606]

After a long and careful reunification plan, my partners son, finally moved in with us in July. We then had the final court hearing in August and at last the care order was discharged!! It has been a long battle and we have had to fight all the way to prove ourselves. We have tackled delays, lies and intrusion by the local authority but it has been worth it. We have funded the case ourselves and paid for an independent report when the local authority refused to assess us..we have proved them wrong!

There were times we wondered if we were doing the right thing. The local authority continually told us he was very happy with the foster carer and would struggle with the change. We worked with a fantastic therapist who assured us he wanted to come home and that although loving and caring, the foster carer was actually unable to offer him everything he needed and was infact stifling his growth and maturity. Hearing our boy tell us that he was so happy to be back with his dad in a 'real family' helped us to accept we were doing what was for the best for him and not just for us. In the time he has been spent with us as a family and since his move, the local authority has now recognised how much he has moved forward and more importantly how happy he is. With the final ruling we were given the change to finally move on as a family and put the mistakes my partner has made in the past. My partner is over the moon to have to opportunity to be the dad he needs to be.

I have learnt a massive amount throughout this process so here is some advice -

1.Never Give Up
2.Keep evidence of everything you do
3.Be proactive - don't wait for the local authority to ask you to do something to prove the changes!
4.Keep copies of all core group/lac reviews/reports - check them and makes sure they are accurate
5.Never be frightened to question anything and ask for evidence (in one report to the courts a local authority social worker stated my partner had hit his son in the past. This was a lie, when challenged they told us they got mixed up???!!!)
6.Be honest about everything and take responsibility for your actions

Good Luck to everyone still fighting xx

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi Alfie,

Thank you for coming back and sharing your good news as well as your helpful list of good advice.
I think a lot of parents will find this very helpful.

It is fantastic news!

Suzie

[Saraheve]

Hi congratulations on your success in the case. One question did you employ a independent social worker. Thanks