Seeing a child in care once they turn 18

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Joined: Sun Nov 26, 2017 11:03 am

Seeing a child in care once they turn 18

Post by Woogle » Mon Nov 27, 2017 7:14 pm

I am hoping you can advise me on a matter that I cannot find relevant info on by search engines.

Around 2004 my child was placed in foster care and I haven’t seen him since. As you can imagine, this has place a huge emotional toll on me over the years.

Although I still believe it should never have happened, and that the social services at the time acted unfairly, what’s done is done as they say.

Andrew (my son) turns 18 this month and I would very much like to have contact with him, but I do not know how to get the process started, or if it is even possible.

Is there any guidance you can give me, or any relevant information on the internet to help me?

Thank you very much for any advice you can offer.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Seeing a child in care once they turn 18

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Nov 29, 2017 4:16 pm

Dear Woggle

Welcome to the parents discussion board.

My name is Suzie, online adviser at Family Rights Group. I am so sorry to see that your son was placed in long term foster for all those years but you had no contact with him.

As your son is turning 18 and will no longer be subject to a care order, the decision will be his as to whether he wishes to have contact with you.

You have not given any details of why you have not had any involvement in your son’s life over the last 13 years. As a looked after child you were entitled to have contact (unless it was not in his interests for you to do so), also children’s services (new name for social services) should have kept you informed about your son.

I think all you could do now is to get in touch with the local authority in whose care your son was placed to find out if his social worker will let him know that you wish to have contact with him. It might be helpful if you were to write a card or letter to him which the social worker could give to him. It might be difficult for him to re-establish a relationship with you if you have played no role at all in his life. Did you send him cards for birthdays and Christmas?

If there were specific reasons why you could not see your son, it may be that he was given an explanation whilst in foster care.
You may find our advice sheets on the duties children’s services have when a child is in the care system and support for young people leaving the care system.

As I have stated above, it will be your son’s decision whether he wishes to have contact with you.

Should you wish to speak to an adviser, you can telephone our free confidential advice line on 0808 8011 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday (except Bank Holidays).

I hope you find this helpful.

Best wishes


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