was in adoption naw bk in foster

[Kitty]

hi there my son was put whit an adopted familly but they did not feel they was bonding whit him and he was not bonding whit them eany way they was not copping whit him and naw he is bk in foster cear whit is origanal foster cares but they ar still looking at him staying on the adoption regiaster and they said evan tho he is bk in foster i carnt hv my contact bk incase he gets another family so i can only hv letter box evan tho i was having contact til he was adopetd

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi Kitty,

Welcome back to the Parents Forum.

I am sorry to hear that the placement with the adoptive family broke down. It must be very confusing for your son to have to change carers again.

Contact

When there is a placement order, the law says that parents do not have a “right “to contact. But, if it is in the best interests of the child contact should take place.

Children services have offered you letterbox contact only. This might be because they are worried about the effect of him coming back into care. They will want him to settle with new carers as soon as he can. If he sees other adults (including parents) it might be more difficult and confusing for him.

Would you have a case to argue that it is in his “best interests” to see you again?
When did you last see him? How often were you seeing him? What did the care plan say about contact?

Ask children services to explain, in writing, why they have made the decision to offer letterbox contact only. If you didn't agree you could challenge by way of complaint.

You could speak to your solicitor as well.

When is the letterbox contact happening? Can you get any help with writing a letter or card?

For specialist help for parents about adoption you could contact After Adoption .


I hope this helps but please post back if you have any questions.

Best wishes,

Suzie

[Kitty]

hi there my son is naw bk in foster whit the old cares that he was whit when i was having ccontact but the soacial worker said that i was only still aloud letter box contac i last saw my son befor he got addopted i was seeing him every week then it went down to once a month but they are still on about finding him another family to adoped him but what happes if they same ting happens agin

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Kitty,

It is very distressing and unsettling to think your son was settling with prospective adopters-which would have been his permanent home- but then he came back into foster care.
At least, he is back with his old foster carers.

You are worried that if he is placed with new adopters, they won’t cope and he might be moved again.
That is an understandable worry.


You could ask for a meeting with the social worker to let her know your worries and see what she can do.
Ask your sons social worker:
• What happened?
• Is your sons going to be assessed to see why he did not settle?
• Ask her what help and support is being given to your son? The law says they should give him support, if he needs it.
• Will new adopters know about the difficulties and be offered support to prevent a further breakdown.


You as Mum might also benefit from help and support.

The Birth ties service at After Adoption, help parents whose children are being adopted. See my earlier post.

Children services, must also provide you with a key worker to help with the adoption process and counselling and information about the adoption process as well. Has this support been offered to you?

I hope this helps but please post back if you have any questions.

Best wishes,

Suzie